My new girlfriend hasn't had sex with me yet?

[Anonymous]

I going out with this nice girl for 2 months now, very nice, haha. When I've met her she looked like the most amazng innocent sweet women I've ever met, she really looked innocent.

Now i know from her past that she fucked 24 guys. Just to say, i am 3 years older and i had sex with 3 women in my entire life, and i mean sex like oral sex or petting included. So she had 8 times as many as me.

At first i was shocked. I didn't expected that such an innocent looking girl was so promiscuous. But hey, who am i to judge? I did many mistakes when i was a little kid so i shouldn't judge her for it, or so i thought.

Never judge a book by his cover, right?

Now i tried to overcome this pain in my chest.

But this doesn't really bpther me cause i know, she had many dicks inside her but i had sex about 100x times as often as she with my year long relationships.

But! We dont have sex. Why? Because she wants to wait before she is ready. What?

I know that 2 months before I've met her she hooked up with this guy from my work, he was a stranger for her. But I, her boyfriend has to wait? What the hell is this forva logic? Am i really that worse than all this assholes she fucked?

Why dont she want to have sex with me? She only says she isn't ready and wants to make it more special with me so that it works out. Ah very nice reason, but i want to hear such a reason only from girls who aren't promiscuous...

Sex with her won't be special or meaningful in the first place cause nothing that was easy available has any value. I likeher a lot as a person and i have big feelings for her and thats why i am with her. But sex? Is not special with her! Kissing also not, cuddling? Nope.

So physical intimacy is worthless with her and so i am sith her for emotional intimacy because not many got it from her.

But i dont want to be the poor guy who won't get sex with her and ends in a sexless marriage with her.

Should i wait or should i leave andfind someone for whom i am good enough to have sex with?

[WarsanN]

In my personal opinion. I think she sees you as a fresh start. Not like any of those guys that came before you.
And while you do not value it. I think she finds it special since she thinks you are. Which is probably why she desires to wait with you. Because she has developed emotions for you. Sex and emotions can be completely different and not connected. So she might be waiting Because she doesn't want you to be like the guys before.

However, I believe that just like most things. It is in your best interest to speak with her and have an open and non judgmental conversation on where this seems to be heading. So that both of you, know certainly if you wish to carry on. After all they do say communication is key.
Be straightforward and honest, without sonding condescending. As she might take it harshly if you do not word the message you wish to share, properly.

Her past is hers. You may not agree with how she is handeling your joined situation but it is her choice, how she wishes to act. Just as it is your if you wish to not move forward due to her padt and waiting. 🙂

[WarsanN]

Past*

[Asker]

But i dont feel this way. It feels for me more like i dont make her hot for sex like the other assholes from her youth did. I feel like i am not great enough to have sex with me but the others could get her easy. I feel like the poor guy she wants to settle down with after her slut phase. I feel like i am just her security guy and not the guy who makes her excited.

[WarsanN]

Talk to her. Only she holds the answer to your questions and uncertainty.

[azzntittiz]

Why do you bother if you think intimacy won't be special with her? You sound bitter and confused. Maybe she wanted a fresh start with you and really likes you, but you're mad cause you haven't got laid yet as the other r guys have.
I can't believe everyone is ignoring what you said about her not being special, after that many partners. That's actually not how intimacy works, and you do sound like you're headed for a sexless marriage, not with her, but with anyone.

[Asker]

Ahhh, how can the act she did with stranger be suddenly become special just because she likes me? This is nonsense, this doesn't make any sense. So, i am her new experiment. Now she wants to try it with a different way, suddenly, right? But no matter how i look at it it seems like she had her fun in her youth and now wants to settle down with this poor guy who unfortunately doesn't make her hot for sex like the assholes from her youth did.

[azzntittiz]

You're a bitter man that needs to leave that girl alone, you have problems. Go find someone else then and don't try to make it work with her.

[kaylaS91]

You should leave and... I guess head to your nearest brothel.
(or try to find a girl on Tinder with your opening line being to ask if she's slept with any more than 3 guys.)

[Asker]

Very nice advice, thanks. But unfortunaely i hate casual sex because i can only be intimate with people i at least like somehow and i am in a committed relationship with, so brothel doesn't work. Tinder, hmm, this might work but i think most girls would be creeped out if i write sth like that.

[kaylaS91]

true. I get what you mean by hating casual sex but unfortunately, you can't have you cake and eat it too. You can't demand that a girl have lived the life of nun with zero sex or fewer partners than yourself, then expect her to become super enthusiastic towards sex once she meets you. It's going to be a game of luck to find someone like that and be certain of it without coming off creepy af before you've already gotten emotionally invested.

[Asker]

Yeah but i wouldn't have problems being with my current girlfriend if she could at least show me that she is hot for me and wants sex with me like she did with strangers.

[kaylaS91]

'at least show me that she is hot for me and wants sex with me like she did with strangers.' ... and you know this how?

[Asker]

And i also dont demand a girl with less or no experiences in sex when i can't already find a girl who has the same values as me. But i hate it when stranger could get ig so easy with her but with me its different and i have to wait...

[kaylaS91]

how do you know these other guy she slept with were strangers? How do you know they got with her so 'easily'? Also, what makes you think you're in a position to dictate with whom she can sleep with, and what sort of qualifiers they have to pass in order to be 'eligible' to fuck her?

[Asker]

Somehow. I feel like the guy she settles down with after she had her fun. I really dont understand why she dont want to have sex with me.

[Asker]

How do i know this? Well, she told me that she did it and she didn't know them. Most were drunken hookups and such shit. I am not in a positio to dictate it but i still dont like it.

[kaylaS91]

oooh okay so you know she didn't know these guys prior to hooking up with them. Everything else is fictitious and nothing more than shit you made up to give you an argument of some sort.

[Anonymous]

Not sure if you're making this up, but if you are serious there's an important lesson for you in this. If sex is important to you never agree to be exclusive with a girl until AFTER you've started having sex. If she wants to wait, that's cool--just hold of on exclusivity and keep meeting and dating other girls until she's ready to take things to the next level.

[Asker]

Unfortunately i had casual sex. With my mentality i couldnt have sex with a women if i dont have these two things 1. Feelings and 2. Commitment and therefore i will only have sex once we are exclusive.

[Asker]

Unfortunately i hate casual sex*

[Opinion Owner]

Fair enough, but I'd still suggest you hold off on committing until you KNOW you're going to be having sex. So a good time to broach the "exclusivity" conversation is AFTER you've at least gotten each other off a few times. Perhaps do hand jobs and blow jobs first, then become exclusive and start having sex.

[Dude55]

It sounds like she's changing the way she's going about things and that she wants to get to know you before having sex with you. She may not be happy with her past and might've been used and dumped so by holding off it could show her you're not just in it for her body. Give it time man and don't give up just yet

[Asker]

Not happy by her past? Why did she did it with my coworker not so long ago? Oh so she suddenly wants to change her way? It seems more like i am the poor guy she settles down with after her slut phase.

[Poppykate]

I think that's a little weird... if someone declares that they are my boyfriend, then the knickers are coming down!

[Asker]

But its seems that she will only let the knickers down for strangers but for the person she likes and sees as her boyfriend she plays the role of the ah so innocent girl...

[Poppykate]

Hmm... 🤔 Well that's just stupid! Maybe because she doesn't see them as a long term thing? 🤷‍♀️

[tzdc21]

Do yourself a favor and walk away from her. This has red flag written all over it in all caps.

[Bandit74]

Well you aren't going to get any sympathy from girls about this so you probably would have been better off making this a guy only question.

Personally, I think you should just leave her. You can't make her want to sleep with you and this is obviously something that is going to continue to eat at you, especially since one of the guys she slept with is a colleague of yours.

[Bandit74]

As for why girls do this, I believe that in most cases the guy who she makes wait doesn't turn her on as much as the guys she slept with right away. I just dont believe a girl can have sex with some guys on the first date and then make other guys wait months and honestly say she felt the same ammount of sexual chemistry with both of them.

[Asker]

Seems so. Ahh, dear god, how could you let something like this happen to me, to me from all humans on this earth? Why do i find the girl who uses me for settling down after her slut phase? What have i done to deserve this? Was it because i wasn't an asshole who spend his youth fucking gals like my current girlfriend in my youth?

[Rudra93]

This is so crazy. 😂 Get away from her. You idiot. 😂

[Asker]

Seems like this would be the best but ya know, i really like her... its hard to just go away...

[Rudra93]

You have some self respect left or not?

[Asker]

I have but... i might leave her

[disgustingweebtrash]

Find another girl dude, she's a waste of time and makes no sense

[Anonymous]

wait

[Asker]

Why? Waiting for her because i am not so great as the stranger for her? Because i dont make her hot like others did?

[Anonymous]

Is your name peter

[Asker]

No, why?

[Anonymous]

LMAO this shit I'm only 16 lemme go 😂😂😂

[Asker]

You are young, so please dont end like this girl who sleeps with assholes immediatly but lets the guys she likes wait. Try to sleep immediatly with the guys you like but make the assholes wait months fof it.

[Opinion Owner]

nah even if I like the guy I'll see whether he's worth it or not , just because I like a guy doesn't mean I'll let him sleep with me whenever he says

[Asker]

Great attitude! I am proud of you 👍

[Opinion Owner]

u think u r insecure

[Opinion Owner]

i think *

[Asker]

Oh, What makes you think so?

[Opinion Owner]

cause u thought u don't make her hot like other assholes did if u didn't make her why would she waste her time with u? get out of your world and think a little about her

[Asker]

Her reasons? Maybe she tries not to look easy and more like a good girl infront of me? Maybe she is old now, her looks faded and she uses me as a security? Maybe all the guys she used to fuck rejected her because she is no girlfriend material and therefore she goes to guys like me?

[Opinion Owner]

then why r u with her

[Asker]

I wonder myself why i am even with a girl like that... but you know, you can't really choose the person you like... unfortunately.

[Opinion Owner]

then ask her talk to her danmit