Does It Diminish A Man's Interest If I Say No Sex Before Marriage; But Agree To Handjobs and Blowjobs?

[Anonymous]

Does it diminish a man’s interest if I mention to him that I do not believe in sex before marriage? But is open to giving him blowjobs/hand jobs during the duration of our relations? I ask this because I’m a firm believer in no sex before marriage due to fears of unwanted pregnancies and just sharing that very intimate part of my life with someone in which I do not see a long term commitment or relationship with. Sex is very emotional and bonding to me therefore I only want to share that part of my life with someone who is willing to commit their life with mine. Anyhow I have been reflecting upon this and was wondering how much this will be seen as a deal breaker to any man that shows a potential interest in dating me? I’m currently a university student aspiring to be a lawyer in the future and I’m an introvert with a very small group of acquaintances. I’m still on a journey to finding myself and developing my identity but this is a part of my life whereas I have come to a decision on and would appreciate some input?

I’m 20 years old turning 21 later this year and I'm a virgin.

Thank you very much

[IwannaKnowAll]

Wouldn't be a deal breaker. You're still willing to please your significant other sexually. Admirable gesture. Most women, it seems, think giving a blow job is more intimate than intercourse, and is something a good amount of women don't like doing at all cause they think it's degrading and/or they don't feel comfortable doing it from lack of experience. Personally, I would be okay with that. If the relationship isn't going great enough for marriage, then that's a better way to ensure you don't get pregnant and that there isn't the huge emotional bond to having intercourse - intercourse is WAY more of a personal bond with two people, than just one pleasing the other and only the other.

[NeallyNeal]

it's definitely a deal breaker for me when i was in my 20's and now near 40... still is. But I'm happily married. Funny thing is my wife was a virgin also and didn't want to have sex before marriage. So we got married.. lol. 21 years later.. we are still together because her sexual urges was strong as mines and we did everything except intercourse and anal before marriage. We never did or will do anal.. not for us.. lol. You will have to show your future spouse that you do enjoy sex and you are not giving him a charity filled orgasm to keep him attached to you via hand jobs. All smart guys know that if you have a low to no sex drive... it will not get better after marriage.. lol.

[normalice]

yeah, but mostly it's because it shows that you aren't really interested in sex. I guess it depends on how the blowjobs go. If you seem seriously into it, then a guy might buy that you are sexually attracted to him but just have this strange moral qualm. But you'd have to show a near obsession with giving him blow jobs for a guy to believe it.

[SpurtLover]

I would respect your decision not to have full sex. And I am perfectly fine with you giving me blowjobs whenever I need to cum.

[pakistaniguy]

No you have to choose a side. Is religion behind this thought?

[Lucky2]

It depends on the type of guys you date. I think some would have an issue. How often would you be willing to give him a bj? Would you swallow? Lastly, you could add anal as a substitute to sex.

[imphenominal]

why blowjob? thats so nasty

[badwolfe]

I have never came from either. but I would appreciate the attention and effort you put into it

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend is the same way. If your SO really appreciated your wishes and cares about you, they'll be willing to wait, even if they don't want to. If not, they're not worth your time anyways