Attracted to my sister's boyfriend. And he's attracted to me. What do I do?

[Anonymous]

Ok so I have a big sister, she's eightteen and a senior in high school. And her boyfriend is the same age. Well I'm a freshman and fifteen.
So a little back story on me and my sister. She's gone to public school her whole life because she preferred it that way. Well I got bullied a lot in elementary so I my parents decided to send me to a private art school for my middle school experience. So I wasn't home much. Only summers, and me and my sister didn't get along. She hated that I couldn't take the bullying and thought of me as a cry baby and has disliked me since we where kids.
So fast forward to the beginning of this school year and my parents choice to try me back in public school. I've grown up more and have grown into my body and become more confident due to my looks (a fact my sister hates). She was always the pretty one. But now that I'm at school people see me and I've gotten asked out. And I've noticed after a few dates guys don't ask me out anymore. And I've learned my sister tells them I'm sleeping with other guys and why I didn't live at hime for years was because I had gotten an Std. So boys have stopped talking to me.
This is where her boyfriend comes in. He's been really sweet to me since we met and always tries finding time to hang out with me when he comes over (I don't have my sister to so I get lonely a lot). And we've added each other on Facebook and we talk a lot. And he's told me before he thinks i really beautiful and stuff like that. And has told me how his relationship with my sister is getting bad.
And a week ago we talked and I admitted he was literally the only guy or anyone at school who liked me. And he told me it was because since I met him he's been attracted to me. That I'm what he thought my sis was. A sweet and caring girl. And I'm very much into him as well. But I don't know what to do because he's her boyfriend and he plans on breaking up with her tomorrow because she's treating him so bad for talking to me. What do i do?

[Coolart123]

Before I state my opinion I want to clarify that I have never had been in a situation like this.

Now that that's out of the way let's start.

1st off your sister seems like a bitch (no offense) which means no matter what you do she'll be upset so doing anything purely for the reason to try to make her happy is a lost cause.

As for this guy your talking about he might seem nice or even be perfect okay but I'm definitely seeing red flags. Red flag #1 he's comparing you to your sister. Red flag #2 he talks to you either more than or about as much as your sister.

I think the big thing it comes down to though is whether a potential relationship with this boy or a potential relationship with you sister is more important to you.

[Player-angel]

You can't stop his feelings for you and you can't help she hates you, she obviously is not the kindest or honest person from what it sounds like, and in my opinion, go for it, I think she needs a taste of her own medicine, besides, what is she going to do? Stand up to her and tell the truth to other people if they second guess or doubt you, she doesn't have control over your life and you need to show her that. It is honestly your choice about the relationship part, but you seriously need to show her that your untouchable and that she has zero control over you.

[Paris13]

Even if they do Break up Tomorrow, There is no Guarantee Here, dear, that just because they Break up, they will Not... Make up, and it could Become, hun, a Full Circle Problem Pattern. Stay Clear, dear, for Now Somehow.
She is Blood and this is always Thicker than Wishy Water. Be a Friend to him, but do Not do anything that will cause a problem with your sis, and Feel it out and See what the Future Then, my Friend, might Bring.
Good Luck. xx

[Asker]

That's what I wanted to do. I don't understand why people are acting like I did this on purpose. I never meant to like him, And I never meant for him to like me back. It just happened. And I don't wanna hurt Her, but I do have real feelings for him. And people keep saying I'm a bitch or a horrible sister and I don't understand what I did so wrong

[Paris13]

I know you are Between a Hard and Heart plsce with both. However, you need to go slow here so take it slow and even if you do not let her know (If they break up anyways, see this First) just be a friend and make it your own business. xx

[Paris13]

Than you, Gag, for the Vote of Confidence, and hope asker, you will Listen to the Master Here, dear. xx

[AzureGirl]

Nothing. He's still with your sister. But I wouldn't jump to go out with him considering it'll drive a huge wedge between you and your sister.

[Asker]

He's breaking up with her tomorrow. I said that in the description. And my sister hates me regardless, so I really don't know what to do

[AzureGirl]

Saying and doing are two different things. Regardless, getting with him immediately after he breaks up with her isn't a good idea even without your sister issues

[Uziel_007]

Your sister doesn't sound very nice but that doesn't mean you get to steal her boyfriend.

I'd ignore his advances and maintain my distance if I were you.

It might not seem like so but always remember blood is thicker than water. In other words, sisters before misters.

[Asker]

I'm not stealing anyone. I told him I don't wanna be with him if he's with her. And as far as my sister has made it seem she doesn't view me as her little sister any more and apparently never did

[Uziel_007]

I'd maintain my distance if I were you. Even delete him from Facebook. However, that's what I'd do if I were you. You were basically asking us what you can do. I'm informing you of what I feel you shouldn't. Over here, inaction is your best move. Cut off all ties.

[snekbrek23]

What you need to do is let him break up with her, and then you need tell him you need space to deal with your sister. The only way this can work for you two is if you get your sisters blessing first. It may take some time, But if he really wants you, he will wait.

[Asker]

My sister would never give a blessing of me being with anyone. Let alone him. She's literally made ever guy leave me

[Wonderer89]

Nothing. Of all the people in the world, you choose to cultivate a relationship with your sisters boyfriend. Even if he breaks up with her; you getting together with him at any point over like the next 5 years will be seen as wrong.
She sounds like an asshole. But that doesn’t mean you had to stoop to her level

[Asker]

Considering I've tried dating lots of other boys as I said I find it rude you acted like I tried stealing him when I didn't

[Wonderer89]

It doesn’t have to be stealing, you have cultivated an inappropriate relationship with her boyfriend. That’s on you, you choose to spend time with him, you chose to have him on Facebook, and you chose to have deep and personal conversations with someone already in a relationship. It’s just 10x worse that you’re doing it with your sisters boyfriend. This is your behaviour, your choices. If you don’t like hearing that it makes you a bad person then perhaps don’t do it

[Asker]

It's called having a friend. I have every right to hang out and talk to who ever I wanted. And sweetie I'm not the one who asked him to tell me he's having problems with how she treats him. He's a big boy he chose to tell me. So don't make me out to seem like a bad sister because I developed feelings for someone who's been nice to me since all I've gotten since I've been home is my sister treating me like crap and calling me a little bitch everyday and telling everyone I'm a white with STDs

[Wonderer89]

But you are a bad sister. Just because she’s a shitty person and has done bad things doesn’t excuse you choosing to be a bad sister. Own your actions, don’t be weak

[Asker]

Considering I haven't done anything wrong sweetie I'm not a bad sister. Liking someone doesn't make you a bad person so don't even try it.

[Wonderer89]

You have a lot of growing up to do “sweetie”. Everyone is telling you the same thing. Just because you feel entitled doesn’t mean you’re right. Hopefully you grow up a little, but clearly you and your sister are cut from the same cloth

[Asker]

Clearly I haven't done anything with him. And so far don't plan on it unless I keep feeling like this and can find a way it won't cause any bad things. What I'm saying is I have a right to be happy. And my sister has done everything she can to stop me from having that. If wanting to be happy males me entitled as you so clearly seem to think then I don't care. Because I shouldn't have to be unhappy because she literally doesn't want me to have any friends let alone someone I like

[Wonderer89]

Sure. You should be happy with your sisters boyfriend lol ok. Cheating doesn’t mean sex. Cheating can be anything one needs to hide from their spouse including cultivating an emotional attachment with someone else. I get that you’re young and want to justify your crappy behaviour with scant definitions so you don’t seem like a bad person, but that’s not how life works. Your sister will continue to hate you, most likely spread even more rumours about you but this time it’s proven by your own actions. That’s your choice 😊 good luck with this life lesson

[FutureTrunks]

Don’t do nothing. There’s too many guys in this world to share one with your sister

[Asker]

It's not sharing. If he breaks up with her they're not together. He can do what he wants. It's not like she hasn't taken guys from me

[FutureTrunks]

Still that’s stupid. Sharing or not, there’s too many guys on this planet to be “stealing” from your sister

[Asker]

Considering it's not stealing. Stealing implies I made him leave her. I didn't do that

[kikikat95]

Family is more important than your 15 year old relationship with a boy.
Fix your relationship with your sister first tell her how you feel how she's been treating you that's so important to fix your relationship

[Robbey]

You don't do anything EVER.

[SapphireLilly]

Don't do anything with any of eachothers partners... Trust me even as the years go on people dont forget the hurt or betrayel of family or friends!! You will have no chance of ever getting closer to you're sister if you persue anyvkind of relationship with her Boyfriends!!!
Plenty of fish in the sea and at 15 you jave a long time yet to keep searching.. its not worth it!

[Asker]

I've tried dating lots of boys. All she does is make up stuff so they stop talking to me

[SapphireLilly]

I've got a brother 10 years older And his friends liked me back when i was 15 and still do , even tho we are opposite genders he was pissed at me if i even thought about it! Anything I've ever done he still brings up... so what im saying is family is forever unless its going to be permanent and worth causing drama forget it and move on.. Regardless of ur crush or lust feelings x protect yourself if anything from the drama

[Asker]

That's because his friend was twenty five and you a minor. That's disgusting on his friends part I'm fifteen nothing is weird about an eighteen year old and fifteen year old

[SapphireLilly]

you're sister shouldn't make up these things about you either and its obviously jelousy causing it... Will you're parents be upset also if you end up dating her ex? Its just not a nice thing that you are even discussing you're sister unkindly to her boyfriend when she is away the bitterness between u2 is Bad

[SapphireLilly]

Lol he had friends that were 18 19 20 so on

[Asker]

I don't say unkind things about her to him? Where did i even say that? He's the one who says she treats him poorly because he's nice to me. I try talking kindly of her to people because she is my sister and I do love her. But she treats me like crap. And it sucks because you guys are acting like I did something wrong. All I did was have feelings for someone because for once someone is actually being nice to Me, and cares aboit me. Something I don't get the privilege of having because of her.

[SapphireLilly]

Think by playing the victim everyone will jump on ur bandwagon and support you're affection 😂 unfortunately in this situation majority seem to agree its just unquestinable stay away feom you're sisters lovers... As should she yours!!! Or go ahead now take advantage of the situation it may not last longer that a month... but wait until you may be happily married 10 years from now she might not have forgotten you're betrayel and decide to return the favor 😙

[Asker]

Considering I'm not playing victom. I'm nearly stating how I'm treated your insult makes no sense

[TripleAce]

oh nooo... not worth it
let it go lol for now

[christinajames]

Go easy. Don't forget it can be a setup by your sister to humiliate you with proof of your mistake now with him.

[keyana]

I had the same thing but I wasn't attracted to him cuz he's older than me, when he comes over, he stares at me when she's not looking.. To me I would not date my sister's guys... I let him feel me up once but that was about it.

[sideboobbob]

It would be smart to stay out of this altogether, messing with a sibling at this age tends to leave big scars. If it was me, I'd treat it like a set up, be suspicious of everything , it makes you think of everything that could go wrong , and after awhile, you'll just lose interest , good luck

[TheUglyMonk]

Yuck.. That fella was treating you nice because he was attracted to you while he with your sister and now is looking to rock two sisters, now that's a trait in a man I'm sure no one wants; quality boyfriend *sarcasm*.

[Asker]

Considering he never did anything with me while with her he hasn't really done anything wrong. By the way if you weren't being rude your Bo Burnham picture would be a lot cooler

[TheUglyMonk]

I wasn't being rude, I was singing it now repeat stuff.
media.giphy.com/media/KWBfnMjc6mrja/giphy.gif

[Asker]

Damnit I wanna not like you but you using Bo against me is making me think you're funny

[TheUglyMonk]

Lmao I'm not trying to be funny nor trying to be rude, I know little about that guy so I can only judge him by what I know about him.

[Hazel31]

.. leave him... he want to use both of u

[BleepRawrsaurus_Rex]

Stop and read your question it’s your SISTERS boyfriend... have some dignity!

[Asker]

I have dignity. Liking someone doesn't mean I don't have dignity

[Tiffany_love_100]

Her sister treats the guy like shit wouldn't u so the same.

[Asker]

@Tiffany_love_100 no. I actually like him. Why would I treat him bad?

[Asker]

@Tiffany_love_100 sorry I thought it was her saying I'd treat him bad.

[BleepRawrsaurus_Rex]

@Tiffany_love_100 and @asker I’m assuming I’m talking to the same person. I would never even consider my siblings partners as someone I can have intimate relationships with. It’s morally wrong and it’s destructive. Do yourself a favor and grow up.

[Tiffany_love_100]

I meant u wouldn't wanna treat him like shit

[Asker]

@Tiffany_love_100 apparently we're the same person

[Tiffany_love_100]

Apparently 😂😂

[BleepRawrsaurus_Rex]

Yeah you seem emotionally unstable so I’m going to take that as a hard yes

[Asker]

Clearly you're just stupid. As I'm clearky not the other girl sweetie

[BleepRawrsaurus_Rex]

*clearly and oh okie

[Tiffany_love_100]

I. Have a boyfriend sorry I'm. Not emotionally unstable and u shouldn't judge someone on here they ask questions for help not to get judged

[Asker]

@Tiffany_love_100 I don't really care what she think. She's not me or anyone I care about so her opinion is nothing of relevance for me if she's just going to be rude

[BleepRawrsaurus_Rex]

@Tiffany_love_100 the question was posted because they wanted advice and that’s my advice

[BleepRawrsaurus_Rex]

If you don’t like the truth then don’t ask stupid questions.

[GrayWhi2]

I think you first need to fix up the problems your sister created for you then think about her boyfriend and by the way your sis is mean and having meanies ex is like invinting disaster.

[Asker]

I've been trying since I got home to fix my problems with her. No matter what I do i can't

[GrayWhi2]

As you said your sister left no guy for you and take my advise having her boyfriend even if they break up is not good for you... just be paitent and fix the problems

[Tiffany_love_100]

Your sister sounds like a bitch date him if u guys will be happy do it it's worth it.!

[Asker]

According to everyone else I'm the bitch sister for liking him

[Tiffany_love_100]

Wtf fuck all the people who say that get the guy if u like each other date no one will stop u

[Asker]

Thanks for being one of the only nice people

[mrshyness]

Fuck him

[chrisblade]

1. Stop telling ur sister about ur boyfriends or friends or anyone.
2. Tell them about ur sister before she does it again.
3. If a guy trusts ur sister more than u then he is not fit for u.
4. Lies can easily be proven. For ex. std can be proven using medical records. Lies are always fabricated superficially. Ask more questions about the lie and it will be caught.

In short become the big sister.

[Anonymous]

K, that's gross

[Anonymous]

He is a piece of shit for pursuing you in order to fulfill some idiotic porn scenario. He wants to use you and you will be a piece of shit as well if you allow that to happen

[Anonymous]

You leave it alone

[Anonymous]

Snap out of it. She's your sister. You don't do things like that to your sister. You go to extreme efforts to not do so. Efforts that you would never go to for anyone else except possibly your mother.