A mixture of all the advice below might help, but here's the deal. Women start colder than men and need more time to warm up. It sounds to me like you are trying to get the effect too early, before properly getting your body "ready" to cum. Here is what I suggest:
You have to reprogram yourself. First off you might be putting too much pressure on yourself to cum, and so the tension is having the opposite effect. A good exercise to learn to relax and associate relaxation with pleasure is to do the following.
Run your bath until you get the perfect "warm" temperature. You do this by holding the BACK of your hand under the water until the temperature makes your tummy feel warm. Then, curl up in the tub and position your clit right under the spout so the water tumbles down onto it. It will help if you have a beach ball or something to prop your head up with so you don't struggle with any water filling the tub. The key is to completely relax. Don't even try to masturbate at first, just think about how nice it feels.
After you get good and relaxed and that water feels DAMN good, start playing. Not grinding or rubbing, but just playing. the goal isn't to come the first time, the goal is to re-associate relaxation with building sexual feeling. Do that for a little while until maybe you do cum. If necessary, you can add the use of a waterproof vibrator.
Also a water jet in a hot tub will work just as well if that's easier to be discrete about. The other thing is once you do cum, DON'T STOP. you are reprogramming, and if you program to have one orgasm and stop, that's what you will do.
Once you finally cum, just relax and see if you body starts building for another. Then encourage it along. This is a good way for any girl to train for multiple orgasms FYI.
Once you feel like you are both relaxed and able to come more easily, have your boyfriend f*** you in the shower. The familiarity of the warm water will remind you that its time to cum. after a few of those quickly transition to the bed so you don't form a habit out of needing water to cum.
Good luck, this sounds like the most fun homework a person could get. haha!
See I had one of those massaging shower heads and that always worked. I'd find myself taking 10 showers in one day thanks to it lol but I can't find it and that was like one of the only things that could make me orgasm in less than 10 minutes. But I'll try to warm up first before I try to cum. And yeah sounds like the best hw ever lol.
I'm not a woman, so I probably won't be able to help you with the solo, but with a guy, I would probably say relax. You seem so focused on cumming that you don't even really enjoy it-- just relax, and don't stress about reaching an orgasm. Try talking to the guy more-- give him pointers on how he is eating you out, or how you want to be fingerbanged or f*cked. Not only will this make it more enjoyable (we listen to suggestions-- we are just as nervous), but it will take your mind off yourself. I guarantee if you relax, try some new maneuvers, and talk about it with your partner, you will orgasm faster-- and you'll enjoy it every time!
I found that "Intense" works.
I don't know why or how, but it works and it's amazing.
Might I also suggest a doc johnson clitoral vibrator?
Relax, don't get frustrated when you can't orgasm. Also, try different postitions, imagine sexy things.
Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions
What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Have him go down on you. Always works for my GF. And there are sensitizing creams.
is this during sex, or by yourself?
Both
Foreplay is important in my opinion. I find I finish (and I have a hard time finishing, I too have to have marathons more often than not for a single orgasm, but very often none at all) but when I have finished I was always horny to the point it was driving me insane. Sure I've been horny and had sex. But when my partner would tease me and make me work for it, I'd just be so ready for it, that when we start I really go for it. So personally that is what has worked for me.
Try using a vibrator! Some women just need a little more to break the ice.
Plus try not to put too much pressure on yourself- this may be adding to your problem.
During sex you need more foreplay, ask your boyfriend if he will use your vibe on you!
I think that's so sexy.
Good luck!
Have you tried to stick something in your butthole, like a finger?
No, not a joke, it really works for some girls.
Yeah it works when my boyfriend and I have sex but we've only done that once. It doesn't work when it's just me
Try using Liquid V, it makes you more sensitive in your clit area and can make you orgasm much faster, my girlfriend uses it and it works.
My girlfriend says to try fingering your ass at the same time as your clit or g spot (this works for her when she is on her own) and also to try a rabbit vibrator.
If you are talking about masturbation, use both hands: Drawing circles over the cl|t area with two flat fingers of your non dominant hand and rapid penetration around the pubic bone corner up to your g-spot with he dominant hand. Fast, not easy, does it.
Sex? Have him learn oral sex from this book: "She Comes First: "The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman" by Ian Kerner and bring you to a first orgasm that way. If he then hops on quickly and starts FKG with authority, you will come again and, possibly, again. This is not a voyeur response of talking about sex with a girl. This is the voice of personal experience.
Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
Most Helpful Guys