Sexual Relationships
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My boyfriend said that it felt wrong to be having sex every time we see each other, but he initiates it 100% of the time. Can someone explain?

My boyfriend got a hotel new years eve because we were going to a new years party. I thought it was a special occasion so I wore lingerie for the first time. He got kind of upset after he took my clothes off and saw it saying that it felt wrong that we have so much sex and that I obviously expected it. But I've never expected it. Sure, I thought it was a possibility. It was the first time I even ever wore something that matches. But if he hadn't initiated anything I would've changed in the bathroom and hed of never seen it. I told him to stop and cuddle me and that not having sex was okay... The next morning he YET again initiated sex. I said no before AND after he stripped me. I felt so guilty for him feeling wrong the night before. But he wasn't having it and he had sex with me anyway... We've been together 2 months, known each other 7. Ever since we've gotten together, we do have sex every time. I understand it being a legit concern, and I've never initiated it a single time. I dont understand why im the one feeling wrong and guilty now, and what I should do.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • erm don't worry there's something wrong here, why would he fell guilty because he wants you that's ridiculous.

    if I'm being honest the only thing I can see happen here is he's planting a seed, a seed of doubt, because I don't think he sees it working long term, so when he decides he's gotten more than enough sex from you he may end it with you and use the too much sex thing as a reason, this is just a way to make it seem like it's your fault you guys split.

    this is just my opinion tbh sorry if it offends you.

    • I'm not offended. That's a possibility I didn't think of and I'll keep that in mind.. He's had sex with three girls, but he's never slept with the same girl twice. So sex is still new to him and I figured that played a part in it... Either way, he invited me in to talk to his family (Im the first girl he's ever brought home, and I've been around them a few times now) when I dropped him off and invited me to a trivia night the very next night. So I guess things are okay for the moment. I dont know what signs id be looking for if i was short term.

    • well you might possibly be the first gf? I'm getting a vibe your older than him? well I just can't see any other reason why he'd bring up having too much mutual sex is a problem especially since he's starting it, that's the only logically thing I can think off. well good luck I hope I'm wrong.

  • Stop worrying!!! Something about the hotel may have triggered a thought. It clearly isn't a significant concerned if you keep on doing it.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't really understand why he thinks it's wrong for you two to have sex frequently or expect it.

    If he had sex with you even after you said no, then that's rape.

    There are a lot of major issues going on here.

    • It wasn't "No, I don't want to have sex." It was "No, you said you felt wrong about having so much sex so I'm okay with waiting for awhile." Followed by "I don't understand why you didn't want to have sex, but now you do." I'm always asked for verbal consent and I finally said yes when I realized how much he wanted it in that moment.

    • Oh, I see. Okay, glad it wasn't a rape situation. But it sounds like he's messing with your mind, and your emotions. Have a serious talk with him, at a neutral time when you're not about to have sex. Ask him to explain WHY he feels concerned about the amount of sex you're having. He has every right to say no to sex, obviously, but it's not fair for him to give you emotional whiplash and make you feel guilty for no reason. I'd suggest having a major heart to heart and resolving this issue before you have sex with him again.

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 4

  • If both of you feel this is wrong but he warms you up and you go through with it then it's a question of whether or not you both really feel it's not wanted.

  • You are together for 2months so having seks is normal. The longer the relationship goes on the less seks you will have.. Maybe he is trying to keep it exciting for a longer time?

  • The penis has a mind of its own

  • You don't need to feel guilty

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Home >  Sexual Relationships  > My boyfriend said that it felt wrong to be having sex every time we see each other, but he initiates it 100% of the time. Can someone explain?