Guys, is it best for me to stay a virgin?

[Anonymous]

I decided this about a year ago due to how my body looks. Before you lie and say “Most guys don’t care”, “You’ll find the right guy”, etc, let me explain. I know how men think. The more flawless a girl looks, the better. I understand men are visual, they like nice bodies. I’m not mad at men for being attracted to women who are near flawless (the majority are!), they can’t help what they’re attracted to! Below is everything wrong with me.

- My shoulders are wider than my hips, which lets be honest, it makes it look like you’re having sex with a man.
- My boobs are saggy and on the larger side. There’s about 10 light and long stretch marks on each one. My nipples are low instead of being in the middle of the breast.
- I don’t have a flat stomach. Enough said.
- I have a dark birthmark line that is directly on the center of my belly. It’s around 5-6 inches long.
- I have large love handles that bulge no matter how much exercise I do. They make it look like I have no butt or hips. I’m literally shaped like Shrek.
- I have strawberry skin on my legs and breasts.
- I have brown skin and my vagina, inner thighs and inner butt is pretty much black.
- I have dozens of stretch marks on my body that are on my breasts, upper arms, sides, back, butt and inner thighs. They aren’t cute and aesthetic ones you see on most women.
- I have multiple dark small scars on my arms, legs and butt.

Gross right? It would be selfish of me to show a guy my body, knowing he would be turned off and easily choose someone physically better. It reaches the point where it’s inconsiderate. If I was a guy and saw myself, I’d walk out and run for the hills lol. I’ve watched professional and amateur porn, and it’s crazy how perfect these women look. I don’t want anyone to think I’m doing this for compliments or sympathy. You can seriously tell me I’m gross and not show my body to anyone, and I’d respect you for helping me to justify why I made the right decision. I’ve never gotten input on it.

[Losalt]

Seriously, the last thing you should be worrying about is if showing yourself to a guy is "inconsiderate"... -_-
Ok, I get it, you're not a supermodel, fine.
And yeah, you might not be the first pick for a lot of guys.
But seriously, looks is more of an advertising plate then what's actually making relationships work or driving interest.

It's not going to be easy for you to find a boyfriend but you're not as bad as *you* think...
Because thing is, the majority of the flaws girls see is with themselvses are things that no one else would see unless you actually *point it out* to them.

What's probably going to happen is that a lot of guys will probably look at other girls first because those girls look great.
Then things for whatever reason don't work out with those other girls and if you stay a part of their social life you can get to know them and might very well end up becomming the girlfriend of one of them.
And once you have a boyfriend you're no longer at a dissadvantage.

You know what they say about "love makes you blind"?
It's true.
When you care about someone they genuinly look better.
So smile, be a positive influence on their lives, enjoy living your own life without making sex etc a huge thing you think about.
And before you know it you'll actually get a guy who *genuinly* think you look pretty nice.
Oh, he might still have sexual fantasies about some super model or some such, but it's *you* he'll love, and to him with an OD of love flowing through his blood you'll look pretty nice and you'll probably both enjoy the sex with time.

[robske]

So I’m gonna do exactly what you told me not to

There is a guy out there

Now with that out of the way, you lay claim that no man would be attracted to you?
Yet why would he not
Yeah men are mainly visual creatures
But I’d give my left nut for a woman who’d actually care enough to make things work out between us

Looks are nice but they fade and tbh I’m not a looker myself so there’s that, i won’t bore you with my list of shortcomings

If you feel like you don’t deserve such things, then that is okay, in the sense that it’s your choice, one with which I’d strongly disagree.
But don’t say it’s to protect men, there are other things at play here and I think I understand those things.

[sally421]

If the guy really likes you, he won't be turned off. I also have a lot of stretch marks and since I have a D cup , let's be honest my breasts are not like in the magazines or the fake ones. Gravity happens. I've been with little more than 10 guys in my life and none of them said anything about those things. Plus I've worked 3 years on the beach where all of my "flaws"were visible and the guys were still attracted to me. Your body has nothing to do with your virginity. If you like to save yourself for "the one", okay do it, but don't do it just because you're ashamed of your body. None of us is perfect. Just own it.

[windknowsmyname]

Your going write this out instead of showing a picture, your selfish. Lol.

Guys hate when stomach is like layers of jelly rolls. And stretch marks are okay. Saggy boobs are okay well. Just dont be in the over weight department and your good.

[Canuck37]

You should stay a virgin until you find the right guy. Don't lose your virginity just for the sake of losing it.

But the irony of women focusing so much on making themselves look better is that men will sleep with nearly anything that has a vagina. You list all these flaws, and yet the men's list is one item long:

- She has a vagina and is offering it to me.

That's it. To be fair, another list item would be "she doesn't have an STD;" and also "she's not crazy." You'll note that none of these things are things you mentioned as potential reasons a guy wouldn't like you.

Therefore, you're fine. Again, don't lose your virginity just to lose it--your virginity actually makes you more attractive to many men, and you should lose it to a guy who is meaningful to you. But you should be aware that a guy is more likely to be offended that you won't trust him enough to look at your body, as opposed to finding you not attractive enough for him.

[Syrian_survivor]

Gold 👏👏

[Berethor]

You claim to had watched amateur porn and yet you not encountered other women with saggy boobs? hell you can even directly search for it, and the same can be said brown colors, but it's something that you can find in professional porn as well, so you can already take three things from your list.

[Berethor]

I mean "two things from your list".

[benny78654]

I'll be hones this is a stupid question. I feel like you are fishing for complements. Realisticly I have been in numerous relationships with girls just for their personality. Don't be silly.

[Asker]

Why would I fish for compliments when there are multiple gross things wrong with me? That’s seriously stupid.

[passinby]

Aren't you being a little hard on yourself? Even if you are the physically ugliest person in the world there is a match out there that will not even notice those things that you mention. Your strongest trait is that you are a realist and accept yourself. That says it all right there; you would probably be one of the most compatible women around. I know I would like that attitude. So yes hang onto your virginity as long as you can or find that guy.

[oldguyincanada]

I do not think women rate themselves very well. My young friend does not think she is attractive and I think she is stunning.

There is a good chance you are being too hard on yourself.

Consider older men. The definition of beauty tends to expand with age.

[NovissimumVirorum]

Don’t talk about yourself that way! I’m pretty sure your exaggerating about your looks, not all guys lust after model types. First off stop watching porn as even the amateur stuff is from people confident enough to show off their bodies and is a really small sampling size of the population. Your attitude towards yourself is really sad and I suggest you seek help for your poor body image issues.

[Revolver_]

Yeah

[Russwill]

Can't judge with no pictures