Embarrassed about my lack of experience?

Please no creeps saying 'I prefer innocent inexperienced women' or whatever I don't fuck with you.

Anyway, I'm 20, in college and quite inexperienced. This is taking a toll on me because it makes me feel insecure and kind of 'left out'. Don't know how to explain but I feel like I should've done more things by now, I feel childish compared to other people's experience.

I've kissed about 50 people but I've only ever had sex with one guy, who I'm currently with but in a rocky 'relationship'. He's more experienced which makes me insecure although he says I have no reason to be insecure. But I don't know it's just embarrassing to me that I've only ever been with him.

Tips or words of advice? I don't want to feel like this anymore and I can't talk to friends about it because it embarrasses me...
Updates:
I don’t think you guys get it. In my social circle i am very inexperienced anyway. But thanks

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm 20.
    I'm currently with my partner, been with her for nearly a year.
    She's the only person I've had sex with, arguably my first "real" girlfriend.
    She's also the second girl I've ever kissed, although I don't really count the first. (I didn't kiss back, she got fed up with me calling her 'frigid' and kissed me outta nowhere. I don't really count it.)

    Apart from the fact that my partner calls me "sex god" at least compared to her exes, I don't feel embarrassed about it. It doesn't concern me in the least. I enjoy my time with my other half very much and if she ends up being the only person I've had been intimate with then I'll still die happy.
    Why does the number of people you've fucked matter? I'd argue it matters more how much fun you have and who you're fucking.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You don't have to be embarrassed, not everyone has sex with more than one person, just because you didn't "play the field" doesn't mean you are inexperienced, it just means sex to you is special, don't be pressured by society saying what is experienced. If you are not happy with the sex you are getting now, you could always talk to your boyfriend about trying something different with him.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 11

  • It doesn't matter. I've slept with a number of women. But only one of those women mattered. Also it was with her that I've done the most adventurous things sexually. If you decided to just have a lot of anonymous sex, whatever. If you want to do more adventurous stuff, look into it and find a willing partner. Or alternatively you could just be happy just the way you are. There is nothing wrong with how you're living your life.

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  • I think you are way over thinking what it means to have 'experience'. You have a boyfriend and I assume are having sex, so that is experience. Compared to others, sure you are a bit behind, but so what.
    It sounds to me that your current relationship probably is coming to an end, or you are tired of it, and you want some new experiences, including a new boyfriend and sexual experiences as well.
    At your age, this is the time to experiment, grow, and learn. Be smart and selective. Good luck.

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  • You are fine. Think of it this way. No matter how experienced you think you are, there will always be people who are more experienced than you. There will always be new things. So take it for what it is and embrace it

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  • "Ive kissed about 50 people"

    https://imgur.com/gallery/ZYtKNfv

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  • 50 people? I know it's just kissing, but Jesus Christ! If it's any consolation, you're not exactly what I would consider "inexperienced"...

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  • Reddit. com has all sort of topics people talk about. It is where i research and get the most tips from.

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    • Thanks! I'm kinda scared of Reddit since all I ever hear about it is incels and Elliot Rodger fans but I will give it a try.

  • He doesn't need to know your experience or lack of to be honest. Just don't tell him.

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  • Change your thinking. Problem solved

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  • It’s normal lol

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  • You’ve kissed more people than -almost- anyone I know.

    Fucking one person only at age 20 is not particularly inexperienced.

    I think you have a biased idea of how much experience many people - not just those hooking upnthe most - have.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Maybe he wants you to be comfortable and he doesn't want you to think those things that make you insecure since he's experienced. It's normal, in the future I'm sure you will be experienced like him.

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  • Are you happy with him?

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    • We fight a lot. I guess I'd say we tolerate each other. But neither of us wants to break up so I don't know what to answer lol. He keeps reassuring me about sex, says I'm the best he's ever been with (don't know if I even believe that but ok) but I don't know, I still don't like being the inexperienced one.

    • Show All
    • Don't know if it would help with my insecurity. Maybe? Or is it all in my head?

    • Listen. If you're unhappy with him, break up with him and play the field. Otherwise, try to forget your insecurity and be happy with what you have.

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