Is it wrong to lie to my boyfriend about being on birth control so that I can have a baby?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes.
    It is rape. Or, rather, the reverse of it is.
    In many places, it is considered legally rape for a man and a woman to have consensual sex, with the agreement that he will wear a condom, only for him to remove the condom (stealthing) or sabotage the condom (poking holes in it).

    If it is rape when a man agrees to birth control, and then lies to the woman in an attempt to get her pregnant, than morally, even if not legally, the reverse is true, and a woman, morally, if not legally, has committed rape by committing essentially the same deception.

    The difference is, if a man does that to a woman, she can abort. If a woman does that to a man, he has no say, and is legally obligated to financially support the resulting child for the next 18 years.

    Pretty dick move. If you want a kid, maybe you should just talk to him about it.

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    • It's... not rape. That's ridiculous. Sexual matters that are wrong are not automatically rape just because they're sexual. What we can agree on is that she's a moron.

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    • The law is wrong then, morally, as it sometimes unfortunately is. I'd love to see the revised code you're referring to, whichever state it's in.

    • @Anon-ymous1 Doesn't matter now, anyways. Her account went inactive. Slight chance she closed it. More likely that it was a fake account, and GaG shut it down.

Most Helpful Girl

  • It’s wrong on so many levels!! The guy is trusting you to be responsible by being on birth control and to not lie to him. You wanting to have a baby is one thing (although it is actually selfish and irresponsible of you to try to become pregnant now as I could pretty much guarantee that you are not in a stable position to have a child). You trying to trap the guy by inadvertently ensuring he makes you pregnant is disgraceful! He should have an opinion as to if and when he wants to have children. It is not your decision to make for the both of you. Your desire to have a child now is evidence of you being a selfish person who is incapable (at the moment) to put another person before yourself. I’m being honest when I say that you should be ashamed of yourself for even contemplating duping your boyfriend! Should you lie to him, don’t expect your relationship to last because he’s not wanting to be with someone who blatantly lies to him, tricks him and is selfish! I sincerely hope you don’t lie to him and try to get pregnant. Fair enough you may want a baby but a baby becomes a child and a child needs lifelong support! You have plenty of time to have a baby so why not spend this time bettering yourself so that when you do eventually have a baby, you’d be able to provide the best for your baby and its future.

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What Guys Said 48

  • If you turn it around and a guy breaks the condom on purpose and makes a girl pregnant, is it wrong?

    Of course it's wrong, it's even considered illegal in many countries. You are putting the guy in a situation he maybe doesn't want and even if you want to raise it alone you will take the fathers money.

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  • Yes its very inappropriate. Also very unfair to the child. This kid would be born into a messy situation. If you want to have a baby, great, be prepared to raise it on your own. Also is the boyfriend father material? Is that level of dishonesty the kind of behavior you want your child to emulate?

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  • Absolutely wrong. Why do you even need to ask? It's a massive betrayal of trust and not the way to start a life long bond between you.
    Do not do this. Please for his sake and the possible child's, it's not the way to do it. If you want a child, you can talk to him, see how he feels or move on and find another way. To deceive him that way would be a terrible thing

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  • Yes, it's wrong. I can't even think of a reason why this would be justified. A baby is a responsibility, and if your boyfriend isn't ready for that responsibility and you lie to him about being on birth control to have a baby, and he finds out you lied to him. It's not going to end up well. You're still young wait until he's ready.

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  • That is extremely unethical. If you want to raise a baby alone then you can have yourself artificially inseminated with donated sperm. I'm really glad I'm not him.

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  • Yes, it's deception and also forces him into a situation where he will be responsible for something that he didn't agree too. As another way to look at it, is it wrong for a guy to intentionally slip a condom to get her pregnant, of course. In fact the second scenario has been construed as rape. As she never consented to unprotected sex, why is it okay to mislead him into thinking that he is having protected sex when he is not?

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  • Very Wrong!
    That is setting him up and lying to him. Where is the trust? How would you feel if he lied to you? Or started sleeping around and lied to you?
    Not a good way to start a family. Do it the right way. If he is not interested then find a guy who wants to marry and have a family, you are still young enough to do it right.

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  • Yeah probably. I mean I get it and I feel you, but that's quite the bomb to drop on a guy. It's also a betrayal of trust that may be hard to get back.

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  • This is why men should always wear condoms that they know haven't been tampered with until they want a baby.

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  • Wow...

    If you're prepared that he'll leave once he finds out that you're pregnant...

    I would walk out very quickly if I felt I was being trapped... This is the highest order or cheating...

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  • Of course it's wrong. What would not be wrong is if you have a child through deception and that child grows up to hate your guts, for you would deserve it.

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  • Of course not, lying is a good thing. Everyone wishes they could be with someone who is dishonest

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  • Please say you are trolling.

    Because that is SO, SO, SO wrong.

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  • Yep. Pretty much the worst possible thing a person could do in that situation.

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  • It's rape, since he didn't consent to unprotected sex or its consequences.

    And for anyone wondering, stealthing is also rape.

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  • Really? You are really asking if this is "wrong"? You've got to be kidding me.

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  • It's wrong on so many levels.
    Not sure why this is even a question.. Did you lose some common sense?

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  • It will ruin your life, like it does for everyone else who tries this kind of thing.

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  • If I ran the world it would be legal for him to shoot you for it

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What Girls Said 12

  • Let me Give you Some, hun, Straight Lace Advice right off the Bat in Being a Master Here, Dear... It's not Right and you will End up Losing him in the End, Should he Not be a Steady Eddy about having a Joe or a Betty.
    Welcome to Gag Town and Best of Luck,. xx

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  • First of all, does he even want children? If the answer is no then he isn't consenting to any of this and can sort of (loosely) be considered sexual assault.

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  • Yes, it’s incredibly wrong! It’s incredibly selfish because you are ruining his life, even if he has nothing to do with the kid he still has to pay child support until it’s 18. And if you want to have a baby to make him stay with you, you’re in for a nasty wake up call because he won’t stay, and he will hate you. Not to mention this will totally fuck up the kid if you have one. If you’re that desperate for a baby go to a sperm bank.

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  • Yes. Dont you dare do that. You need to both be in agreeance when having a kid. I can not stress this enough do not in any circumstances trick him into doing that. Thats dirty

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  • Yes. It's wrong.
    I understand that you want a baby very much. But to the extent of lying to achieve that seems a little low. Talk to him and discuss about it. Don't lie

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  • Even if you don't plan on keeping your boyfriend around its still wrong, if you are asking this seriously then you aren't ready for a relationship at all

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  • IT IS SO WRONG. Do not lie to get him to knock you up!!! THAT IS SO WRONG!!!

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  • Yes that’s an awful thing to do!

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  • Yeah.

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  • Um its hugely wrong.

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  • Yes. I did it too. Lmao

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    • Not sure how that is funny. Disturbing is more the right feeling.

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    • The answerer has been a troll for a while now, this only proves it

    • Wow so much negativity. It was a poor answer on my part. Relax

  • Absolutely wrong.

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