Did going to church, or to a religious school, when you were a teenager make you want to remain a virgin, or did it have the opposite effect?


Did going to church, or to a religious school, when you were a teenager make you want to remain a virgin, or did it have the opposite effect?
I am really curious about the extremes regarding this question as I have seen them both.

I have a girlfriend who's parents sent her to an all-girls christian school to keep her away from boys and sex and what ended up happening was completely the opposite of what they expected.

Since she was being kept away from boys it gave her more of a desire to want to be around boys and an insatiable curiosity about the sex that her parents so desperately didn't want her to know anything about.

And since many of the other girls were sent there for the same reason, and felt the same way she did about it, they told each other naughty stories about what they thought sex was about and what it was like when they "accidentally" saw their brother nude, and so on and so on... you know the drill.

Her basketball uniform was something you'd see on a model posing for a cover shot with the Sports Illustrated magazine as it had a super tight spandex short short with no skirt. I'm not kidding! Now , I'm not judging or complaining about it, I'm just saying that it wasn't something I was expecting at a christian girls school. Of course I live in the San Francisco Bay Area so I guess that explains it.
Then to add coal to the fire atop her parents ice block, and since she was constantly around a horde of other females with equal sexual curiosities and desires, she slowly gravitated toward lesbianism and eventually became immersed in it.

She told me some stories of things that happened at school or during sleepovers that I won't repeat here and other things that I personally know.

Then, of course, there are many other girls, that went to her school, that remained chaste until marriage with complete control over their thoughts and desires.

How did you make it through, or not, if you were also raised as a christian girl, or guy, growing up?
0 1

Most Helpful Girls

  • Promiscuous kids are promiscuous no matter where they go to school. Violent kids are violent. Good kids are good and bad kids are bad. Smart kids are smart and dumb kids are dumb. Religious schools and churches simply put more effort into curbing bad behaviour and rewarding good behaviour than public arenas. It doesn't prevent it and in certain people can exasperate the bad behaviour.

    I went to a religious school. It wasn't a crazy catholic school but it was a private school with a religious base. I'm pretty promiscuous compared to other girls and have sinful desires. But I for one believe the school taught me to respect people more and try to do the right thing for others even if I didn't buy into the entire idea of how God demands I live. Plus around me the public school kids are fuckin crazy and not at all a representation of the world average.

    • What an interesting perspective Ms DG, I like it, THANK YOU so much for sharing that!

  • It all depends on curiosity and intro/extrovertness. The less curious and more introverted girls shunned the thoughts of boys and sex and assumed that no one else thought of it because they weren't supposed to. The more curious and extroverted girls couldn't take no for an answer and couldn't shun the thoughts of boys and sex, and upon talking to others about the ideas, realized that there are others who are in the same boat. The first group ended up being the chaste-until-marriaage virgins, and the second lost their virginity before the end of grade school.

    • So true Ms Elizzie :)

Most Helpful Guys

  • I went to church and to a Christian school for a while - but it wasn't ever my thing (my parents insisted) and it certainly never slowed down my attraction to sex and women. Hell, I quickly learned that repressed religious girls were some of the most eager for sex and the most willing - as long as they could trust that you weren't going to let word get back to their parents/church folks.

    Moderation is healthy. The more extreme and overly-religious the parents, the more the kids rebelled. Several of the strictest parents had boys who went to jail over vandalism or theft, and girls who threw wild parties and gangbangs when their parents were away, or who married extremist men and are miserable in their marriages.

  • I believe that there will be some people who naturally want to abstain, and others who naturally want to indulge, and there is nothing anyone else can do to change that one way or another (including parents).

    I think the girl you spoke of would've still turned out the same way if she wasn't sent to the all girls school. I also think the chaste girls you briefly mentioned still would've been that way if they were in a co-ed school.

    It's nature, not nurture. Temperament, not environment.

    • Not sure that I agree with your opinion Mr SC but it's still a good well thought out one and I love that. Thank you!

    • No problem.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

12 21
  • I think it's a double edged sword. And the weilder is their parents.

    Somehow, like sand, the more the parents squeeze, the more they will become promiscuous.

    In the other hand, with proper education, then allow their kids to choose, they probably will choose to remain celibate.

  • My dad was a preacher it did make me think about my reputation more and not wanting to be seen as easy or slutty. Also not wanting to get pregnant and have my dad angry or disappointed in me. I felt like I always had to be perfect and couldn't make any mistakes because it would make my parents look bad. But it's not like I could do anything anyways because they were so strict.

    • Great answer Ms DC, thank you!

  • Yea it made me wanna wait til marriage. didn't happen but it made me feel more guilty for not waitin

  • didn't make me feel either which way, but i tell you, there were more teen pregnancies at the catholic private school than there were at the "druggies and smokers" public school. I went to the catholic school because it had a better rep, but at least the public school was honest about its students. Some smoked, some took illicit drugs, but so did the "bible bashers" (as we were so eloquently called by the other school) on top of some students using substances others were getting knocked up!

    Granted this only happened 3 times, but still. It didn't happen once at the public school.

    • Well, based on what my friend's experience was, that makes sense Ms Darcy :)

  • I lasted till my junior year. Then i fell prey to the likes of a very attractive blond named Lori G who was and still is an amazing girl

    • Did you marry her?

    • No. She didn't want marriage. She wasn't ready to settle down. I did marry my second girl i had slept with. We have a son together who makes me proud of him every day. His mom left and married another who thankfully she has stayed with to provide stability. To all her kids lives.

    • I do look forward to meeting a girl and marrying her. I'm not closed off to that happening again from my past experience.

  • I grew up in a church and went to a private Christian academy. I do not consider myself religious and haven’t since I was 16.
    While I want to just screw around, yes it is a desire of mine, I also respect my self.
    A lot of my school mates grew up to be extremely promiscuous and other have become chaste homemakers.
    It all comes down to human free will. Everyone gets urges but we all make our choices. We all eventually come to a time when we decide for ourselves what we believe is right and wrong regardless of what we’ve been told.

  • I don't remember ever wanting to stay a Virgin and I grew up very religious, I'm also pansexual so... lol

  • It did neither. Church just made me question others sexual behavior from a less judgmental place. The church will shame you for being what they think is a slut. So in my mind I tried to put myself in other people’s shoes.
    But that didn’t necessarily make me want to copy their same behavior. And I never really agreed with the reasons why one should keep their virginity (in the perspective of the church). I hope that makes sense 😬😅

  • I’m a preachers kid and it didn’t have any effect on me

    • So you mean, you think everything would have turned out the same for you whether you were christian or not?

    • Yes plus I’m not that religious even though I grew up in the Baptist church

  • You don't have to be in a christian school to keep youe virginity, in my opinion a girl shall stay virgin until marriage, for many reasons...

    If a man can control himself, he must also remain a virgin till marriage...

    But it's more of a girl thing to stay virgin... i'd marry only a virgin girl, cause her virginity is the ultimate gift to me on our honeymoon...

    I'll take good care of her, also it's a marvelous feeling to know that i was the 1st and the last...🙂

  • Church was against premarital sex but I marched to a different drummer.

  • I was raised as a christian but used to read a lot too so I quickly learned to form my independent opinions. So it had the opposite effect on me and I became very provocative about that in religious classes... the scandals that we hear about today reinforce my conviction that I was right: abstinence and the stupid association of sex/pleasure with guilt leads to perversity (not the good kind)

  • Yeah it did but I got distracted and gave it up

    • It did what?

    • Make me want to remain a virgin

    • Oh, OK, but then you didn't... lol. ... makes sense now :)

  • I’ve always respected my body and don’t give in my sexual desires. It wasn’t that much religion that taught me but I educated myself on sex and realized that I’m worth more than meaningless sex. That’s just my view and I try not to judge other girls who want to indulge in their desires but it crosses the line if they attempt to get with a taken guy. I know girls who are promiscuous and tried to get with taken guys and it infuriates me.

  • I had too many questions at age 9 about religion. Could not get a straight answer so I quit going to church. I dont know what would have happened.

  • It had the opposite effect because the church did - and still does make a lot of fuss about it.

  • Absolutely not ! LOL

  • The opposite.

  • Religions are dangerous specially that are anti feminism and said men are better than women and Women are their slaves.
    .
    They all are fake and lie.
    I sure that their weak and stupid God cannot to be the world's Creator and manager.
    .
    You're right and i agree with you.

  • Nope, I was jamming my face inbetween the bits of any girl who would let me. Lucky I did not actually get all that far with girls till I left school, or otherwise I would have mini me's running around everywhere.

    • OH MY! And in every tree too! ... lol

    • Yeah, we rubbed our genitals together, it felt great.

  • Show More (13)