Why do I get turned on by idea of my boyfriend being sexually attracted to other women?

I am very turned on by the thought of my partner finding someone else attractive and sexually desirable. However I would never do threesomes or open relationships. So that is what makes it complex. Just the thought that my partner finds someone else appealing gives me tingles. Yeah sure fantasizing is kinda hot of him with someone else but I would never actually do it. Why do I find this so hot? It almost gives me extra excitement if the woman is completely different or hotter than me. Is this like cuckholding? Reverse of it?

(I have shared some of this with my man but he is very tame & mild. He does not enjoy porn for example (religious beliefs) and he is not very noticing of the opposite gender). I am very happy and fulfilled in my relationship and love my boyfriend to the moon and back.

I am not bisexual and do not watch lesbian porn ever.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • It could be one of two things:
    - A mild form of the "cuck" fetish or even just a curiosity (mild because you don't actually want to do it); or
    - You subconsciously compare yourself to these women and feel a sense of pride, accomplishment, etc to think that he chose you over women you perceive to be "better" than you.

    But, I don't know you and I won't make assumptions; those just seem like the two most likely hypotheses.

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  • You mean, cuckqueaning?

    I have fantasized about cuckolding and cuckqueaning both!

    My fantasies about cuckqueaning=>

    I was also aroused by thinking how my wife would​ bring her friends home and I would tell her that I found her friend extremely sexy and hot and how she'll get her ready for me.

    But I found the idea of having sex with other women disgusting.

    Cuckqueaning is similar to a mother telling and talking about her child.

    It's about how (may be- "showing off") sexy your partner really is.
    And it's also about his lust a sexy girl (more sexier than you)..

    When women actually think and compare this secret fantasy to real life it's really disturbing.
    Also him wanting to have sex with other women can be a "trust breaker"

    Some men can take it as an opportunity. While some men can find it difficult bcoz we all have attachments with our real partner.

    I am a man who fantasized about cuckqueaning. And when I compared this with reality

    now, after fantasizing about cuckqueaning, my fantasies have changed in such a way that brings me mental peace.

    My new fantasies involving cuckqueaning=>

    I fantasized that she prepared her friend to have sex with me and left her alone with me in a room.

    "*#Then as soon as we were about to start having romance, she felt bad about it. She was surprised.
    She was shocked. She was surprised to know that I can actually do this.
    Then she came up to me saying that she don't want this to happen and she rightfully pulled me away from her friend"*#

    I fantasize that as soon as I start having romance with the other woman , my partner should rightfully pull me away and stop me from doing it because she (my partner) wants me only and only for herself.

    *"My partner wants me and can't tolerate that I would do such thing. She has rights over me."*

    That is what gives me pleasure.

    I can leave behind all the other girls in the world for my partner.
    This is what gives me pleasure. These feelings brings me "mental peace"

    I wouldn't like to tell about my cuckqueaning fantasies bcoz in real life I can't tolerate such acts.

    Alright! You have these fantasies just bcoz you want your partner to get his desires fulfilled.

    Girl, we should NEVER try everything that gives us sexual pleasure.

    See, it's not legitimate.

    I think , cuckqueaning was one of your secret/dark fantasies. I think you never had expected anything like that from your marriage.

    after

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    • Sexual desires are of two types -
      1) legitimate ones &
      2) illegitimate ones

      I had the mother son-incest fantasy
      It's categorised under illegitimate sexual desires. I used to get turned on by the idea.

      . But as the time passed, I got over those fantasies.

      I don't feel aroused by that idea anymore. I have not fantasized about that fantasy for nearly one year now.

      I wish I could get over with my cuckolding fantasy with my progressing age just like I got over with my mother son incest fantasy

      Just wait for the right time. you won't feel aroused by this fantasy anymore after some 10-12 years (may be).

      I hate my cuckolding fantasy. I had it naturally and I hate it.

      I think 40-50% men have cuckolding fantasy

Most Helpful Girl

  • So basically your boyfriend being a cheating POS makes you cum? I don't know what to tell you besides get some professional help for your condition.

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    • Where in her post did she ever say he cheats? In fact she actually says that he doesn't really pay attention to other women. How is he a "cheating POS" if he doesn't cheat?

    • Show All
    • How am I cheating on him in my mind? Are you... for real? Did you even read the question or...

    • Apparently not in entirety. Just enough to know that you are weird with your fantasies.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • It's a common fantasy, in your case it would be cuckqueening not cuckolding but there doesn't have to be a humilation aspect to it.

    I had an ex who was a bit like that and use to bring home chewtoys for me to play with. In that case I wouldn't have sex with them but we would play with them in a bdsm context together. She really enjoyed watching me play with other women.

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  • Simple

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  • That is normal. tell him find another girl. It would make your love hotter

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  • Perfectly normal and it seems like you have a conflict of kink with him. My current girlfriend is like yourself and it seems like she gets off by having the "You may have him for x amount of time, but he's all mine." power kick. It makes her aggressive as she takes action to "reclaim" me, as she calls it that. I can't complain and I'll never press her to join In since she's not bi and she doesn't want to ever change roles.

    Don't ever press the topic, but at the same time keep the line of communication open as it may vary well be a kink in which will never be explored with him.

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  • IMAO I think you've got "cuckquean" fantasies. But who are we to judge you

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  • Your a female cuck

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  • Me and my partner have experienced this experience

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  • Damn dunno but I would love to have a girlfriend and even wife like you becouse my current girlfriend just hates it when I get sexually arroused by women over the internet, and she caught me several times since sometimes she is not in the mood and goes to sleep and then randomly wakes up and I am in the middle of the act :(

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What Girls Said 1

  • Seems like a cuckquean

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