Sexual Relationships
+1 y

I can’t imagine myself having sex?

So I’m 16 years old, and a lot of girls my age have already lost their virginity and I don’t really feel the pressure right now but I don’t want to leave it too late. The issue is, I just can’t imagine myself having sec.. I haven’t even kissed a boy or hooked up with anyone and I’m going through a stage where I’m kind of self conscious and haven’t had a relationship before. I’m not one of those nerds who isn’t interested in boys because I actually really am interested in boys but I am an awkward person sometimes and I feel that if I was to have sex, I wouldn’t know how to do anything and it would be terrible. I know I don’t need to have sex yet, but i would like to do it sooner rather than later, partly just so I can lose my virginity in order to take away some of the pressure. The only way I can even imagine kissing a boy is if I get really drunk and go to a night club and do it when I’m feeling more relaxed because I really don’t know how to do anything and it will put the boy off. So yeah, I’m 16 and I’ll be 17 in October and I’m embarrassed that I’m getting so old and haven’t even kissed anyone. I’m pretty insecure about my looks at the moment because I have bad skin too, so maybe I’m a late developer.. I don’t know. Help!
Updates:
+1 y
I’m 16 obviously not 6 haha
+1 y
Sex*
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • Well I think you already got some good advice here.

    There are still many many MANY years left for you before being a virgin is embarrassing or anything like that. Yeah some do it even at 12, but just as many lose their virginity at 25 without being nerds or prudes.

    Also if you haven't even kissed a guy, there is no need to skip a step (or 100) and jump into bed with someone. You can flirt with a guy in a club, and you don't have to kiss him. You can kiss him, and not have to take him home. Hell, you can sleep naked with a guy and not have any 'sex'. You could do a million sexual things, before getting into 'vanilla' (penis in vagina) sex.

    You haven't even kissed a guy, so the thought of having to act out a hookup as "it is supposed to be done" and leading up to porn-quality sex all while pretending you know what you are doing is stressing you out. So don't do that. Maybe there's a guy you ran away from because you were afraid he expected step #23, but you would had been fine with step #1.

    Maybe you need to have a connection with someone first. If you are close to someone, you can talk to him about your anxiety and take it slow. Society tells you that there are rules, but there are not.

    Do you think about sex, btw? You can't imagine doing it yourself yet, but you still don't want to be a virgin. Do you think about guys' bodies? Do you masturbate? If you go online and find a hot guy’s picture with his dick casting a huge shadow on his abs, how do you feel? 😜

    I think you are quite cute and most guys your age would hook up with you. Many of them would date you and would be happy to take their time. You're just lacking confidence.

    • P. S. First kiss at 16, and many more after that, but for various reasons didn't get a girl fully naked before 28. Being intimidated of sex was one of the reasons, so I know how it feels. And I think the pressure is higher for guys to be 'experienced'

  • Don't let the pressure of society dictate your sexuality or your actions. Even if you decide to be traditional. I have had many opportunities, but I have not had sex either because I am waiting till marriage. And I'm 31. When a girl is willing to honor her virginity and her body, and hold them until she loves a man enough to give them away and entrust them to him, that is very attractive.

    Girls who give their body away to anyone are a dime a dozen. The girl who is willing to save herself is rare and beautiful

    • Thanks for the MHO!

Most Helpful Girls

  • You’re fine. There’s an old saying that goes “ don’t put the cart before horse” which in this case simply means, dont focus on or think about sex before you’ve met someone special to share that with. itll come in due time. You’re not old. Just be friendly, social and choosy. You’ll meet someone you like, get your first kiss and eventually when you both feel it’s right, have sex. Don’t rush yourself to that point. 💟

  • Ok, at first when I saw “6”, I thought this was a troll question lol😂
    I’m 16 and I’ve never kissed anyone either so I can relate to feeling peer pressure about it. But I don’t want to rush into anything and regret it later. I’ve accepted mostly that I’m one of few who haven’t kissed anyone yet but sometimes it does get to me. At least you can spend your time doing more important things tho.

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What Girls & Guys Said

5 16

  • you're barely15 lol you're thniking about that already?

    • I’m 16

    • Most people my age have done stuff

    • well then. if you can't picture it then maybe you're not ready. or do you want to already?

  • So only nerd girls are not acting like sluts in the place where you living?

  • Please don't be pressured into doing it because others are into it, you probably don't no that they hate doing it but they tell you otherwise. Just keep it till you're mentally ready before you regret it

  • Don't worry so much. You have your whole life ahead of you for boys. There's no rush so wait until you are ready. Don't get with boys simply because you think that's what you should do at a certain age. That's a recipe for regret.

  • i think its very normal at your age but you will figure it all out in time but there is no rush. forget your peers. this is a personal journey

  • There's no rush. there's plenty of time.

  • just relax, you will get your chance to have sex and kiss a guy. If your worried try dating sites and finding a guy that you share mutual interest with

  • Two options:
    1. Late bloomer. You haven't gotten your hormones probably yet but will.
    2. You're asexual.

    Both circurmstances is nothing to fret over.

  • That's okay just do it when you feel the time is right and the person is right for you. It's better than being promiscuous

  • I'm a 25 year old virgin..

    Relax. Your okay. 😊

    • Do you feel pressured though? And do you have a reason why you haven’t done it yet

    • No I don't feel pressured. I have a reason. It's because when I was your age, kids were either having sex in a car or in their parents home and I didn't want it that way. Plus I want to wait until I meet that one girl who I'm absolutely crazy about. So I'm selective in a way. I'm just following my own timeline. I think you should too. Don't let anyone pressure you into having sex just because you feel it's something you should get out of the way. Go ny your own rules. Virginity is just as fine as not being one. Regardless of what some ignorant people might say.

    • Thank you so much That’s so reassuring to be honest :)

    • Show All

  • Go watch porn

  • Just wait, its not worth it, sex is way more than a physical act.

  • Be thankful you are avoiding the boys whilst they are children... it sounds like you are normal. things will happen for you

    • Trueeee I want a MAN not a boy

    • Well concentrate on becoming a person who has value and you will definitely attract a man.

    • Thank you so so much

    • Show All

  • I was 20, just take your time, don't rush into it 😊

  • You don't imagine that. It happens, someday, and that's it. And I told you're, you're a pretty lady, you're just a too young to care about that.
    I swear, I don't understand why teens are so eager to become adults... As if it was better.

  • You and only you will know when you are ready for sex... no need to feel pressured into anything that you aren't ready for

  • Dont do it then , wait until you feel comfortable

  • take it as advice from older brother.
    do not give it to anyone.. the only one who deserves it is ur future husband..
    tbh in western comunity people r pressing on girls and guys to lose it and they through jokes on him if he didn't... lol if u didn't lose it.. never lose it to any man..
    cuz all men want to ejac and take wht they want from u.. even me...

  • When you are ready, you will have a great time having sex. I cannot imagine not having sex.

  • Take your time there is no rush

  • Show More (1)

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