Why do men try to virgin shame women? Especially ADULT women?

Question

When I was in high-school a jerk kept virgin shaming me. I would ignore him because obviously he has nothing going on with his life, but it ticked me off a bit.

I was 17-19. Now I'm almost 20 and this guy was trying to brag about me being a virgin and liking him. He actually got ugly over the years... I've been ignoring him since like Feb. of this year because I can't have stupid rumors going around about me.

I never understood the point of trying to virgin shame anyone, especially adult women.

Maybe a girl is more easily manipulated in her early teens/late teens. However, when the girl enters her 20s, it's better to just save your breathe.

fluxofwondering08 · Accepted Answer

Honestly the truth is that people who have nothing going on for themselves/want to cause trouble or are just overall jerks will find something to cause problems. I don't know exactly why but I guess its some kind of ego/insecurity issue.

There's shame if you're a virgin/prefer to save yourself for marriage or whatever but on the flip side you also get shamed if you're not a virgin/engage in sex casually.

Just be yourself and who cares what they think. If you want to have sex then go ahead, if you want to not have sex thats fine too. As long as you are living according to what you want/being true to yourself that counts.

Also, these guys maybe trying to get into your pants. Don't feel pressure if you do not want to at all.

(Note: I actually never witness virgin shaming while in high school so I never even know this was a thing until now)

Secret6620 · Accepted Answer

Omg I was Virgin shamed in high school. It was horrible. They said I was too fat and ugly to get laid. So I ended up losing it to my best friend at 16. I wish I would have waited until marriage though. I mean he made it special but we were both kids. 🖤

SjE78 · Accepted Answer

I've seen a couple of immature idiots and players do it, they tend to shame them and bully them into getting into bed with them, but those who do are a small number in comparison tbh and honestly not worth the worry or stress, I know it isn't right what those types do, but they win if their victims take the bait
... however i have also seen some women do it too, and they are mainly the jealous ones as they made a choice when they did and lost theirs, maybe regretting things as a result... so they shame some virgins in order to bully them into making the same mistake or project their feelings of regret upon them

AndyOh · Accepted Answer

Because they are idiots and just want to try and take your virginity.

Farawlaa · Answer

There’s nothing to be ashamed of sis, keep your head held high. 💅🏼

Logorithim · Answer

I have never seen GUYS do it to girls, but if they do, its to get in her pants

jacquesvol · Answer

I never did that

codycccccccccc · Answer

Because late virginity is accosisted with being religious and of course being religious is just wrong

Chester_Cheeto · Answer

Ehhhhh, it's kinda expected for older wemen to be virgins

IloveFood702 · Answer

As a woman you get shamed regardless of what you have or haven’t done. I’m serious. It’s crazy, you’ll be judged no matter what

genericname85 · Answer

Cause they wanna get laid.

poneglyphs · Answer

I thought it was the opposite sex that get virgin shamed a lot more? From my experience more girls have bail on me or ghosted me because I was a virgin. Also, it doesn't help that I'm already too old to be a virgin. ;-:

DonCachondo · Answer

Paternal uncertainty due to biology + the historical beginning of generational wealth transfer led to a long tradition of male suspicion regarding female mate choice. Providing for a child that you didn't know wasn't your own and letting him (yes, only 'him') inherit your property was what most property-owning men feared most. Logically, it followed that a supposed virgin bride would be of utmost value because her child would be yours, guaranteed!

So why with modern-day paternity testing is this still an issue? Tradition. Some people just don't bother to update their belief systems with respect to their ever-chinging environment. Instead, they DEFAULT to attempting to control others because it makes them feel just a little more secure. But to be fair to the more reasonable men who obsess about virginity, there are some countries that ban paternity testing without consent of the mother, so the question is still open for them :o

Blue_moonlight · Answer

I never seen such.

Valnac · Answer

I would never do that. That is so immature.

Ben228 · Answer

No idea. I personally dislike it because I'm a virgin as well.

Why do men try to virgin shame women? Especially ADULT women?

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