Sounds more like forced marriage than arranged one since arranged marriages doesn't need to be forced. Even if that person had a good personality, I wouldn't like it if I wasn't attracted and any forced sex would be rape. It really depends though what you mean with average.If you mean average in common and not as in ugly it wouldn't be that bad. There's many average looking women out there who's both feminine, slim, not too tall, with a good set of straight white teeth, long hair and so on, yet are average and not particular pretty. But not ugly either. If a woman like that behaves nicely, smells good and takes care of herself it's not too bad. Especially not if she looks only like an average woman and not like she could be in my family or had any of my family's strong characteristics. They're not necessarily unpleasant itself, but I've my reasons to not like it.If it was an average looking man I would have much less tolerance, report him to the police for rape and run away. Some average women can be really sweet, while it would be only unpleasant and uncomfortable if it was a man regardless of how friendly he was. Average and below men tends to be completely off, while women are of the fairer sex and have more to offer naturally before it turns completely off.If the person was overweight, deformed or very old regardless of gender, then they would be reported to the police for rape immediately anyway. I'm a very visual person, so I can be easily disgusted by slightest thing. Maybe that's the reason I did well when trying design, since people thought I cared enough about aesthetics.
I actually know a lady who is from a culture where they have pre-arranged marriages. Her parents arranged for her to marry a guy much older, and he is the son of their friends. She didn't say if they had sex on their wedding night or not but I kind of doubt it. She said she woke up in the middle of the night after hearing some noise downstairs. She asked her new husband, "What is that sound". He replied, "That is my parents moving in". She is a very unhappy person. She makes good money and doesn't need him for support in any way. She does NOTHING with him and rarely even mentions him. She works overtime and has a full time job and part time jobs. I think just to stay away from home.
Why did her parents make her marry him?
They were all still new to the US, and they just assumed that is the way it is done. I doubt she even questioned it way back then. Imagine, the in-laws "moving in" on their wedding night... Geeschhhh...
I'd feel like total shit and would want to run away. Especially the "arranged marriage" part. I'm not marrying someone I don't like at all. And having sex with someone I was forced to marry is even more traumatizing.I'd run away and change my name before that marriage happens lol
I wouldn’t want to be married in the first place so regardless of how attractive they are (or not), I’d be pretty pissed off. Also, sex is completely off the table so they better not have high expectations.
In the societies of forced marriages, marital rape isn't considered a crime. So the man could force you :/
Well I’m not going to slap a smile on my face and spread my legs just because everyone else tells me so.If it has to get ugly, I can get ugly.
Have an opinion?
It's all about chemistry. If there's none initially, then sex isn't really a good idea. In many arranged marriages, the chemistry grow over time. In your culture, is it traditional for the wife to submit to her husband?
Personally, I would make the best of it and in doing a loving act, I would embody the love that I have to provide. I like average-looking women and if I were poised in an alternate reality then I would hope to have the courage and wisdom to see how I could best live with all parties.After all, this would imply that I actually have a living family that supports and looks to me for leadership into the future. That's a completely foreign life for me.
This is probably the response I most relate to - make do with the situation and give it your best shot! I'd consider myself average-looking so being with an average-looking girl would hardly be a curse, providing we are relatively compatible.Obviously it's not a situation anyone wants to be put in!
The term "average looking" is rather vague. For me, the main issue would be getting forced into marriage with someone I didn't want to marry. If it was arranged for me to have sex with an average-looking woman, I'd be happy to oblige. But marriage?
Of course women vote negatively another example of hypergamy and the ruined dating game not a surprise they can't accept something average.
Most men have no idea how strongly women have an aversion to sex with someone whom they find unattractive
It's not just that he's average-looking by the way. Most women wouldn't even be comfortable having sex with a hot guy they just met
Yes they do their high sex drive tells them to ignore it ever heard of prostitutes? You honestly think men want to pay for a hole thats been used more then a public restroom? I had to lose my virginity to one and hated it but i got it out of my system so don't even come at me with that.
Dating sites also proved that to be a lie as well.
"Most men have no idea how strongly women have an aversion to sex with someone whom they find unattractive"and yet the number of women dating men 20, 30, 40 years their senior remains to shock and awe.
@demonics my dad was 30 years older than my mom, & by the way he was broke, so it wasn't about money.My mom often talks about how attractive and handsome my dad was. I think he was average-looking.At least for a woman, if you fall in love with someone because of their personality, they become physically attractive to you.
Women can't stare at someone personality so when you mother said he was attractive he simply must of caught her eye.
Thats called an anecdote sweetie. In the arena of argumentation you might as well have said 'my shirt is green.'
Traumatized. Don't like the idea of arranged marriage. Wanna marry someone I'm in love with.
Why does being average affect the sex? I'd be more pissed off that someone thought they could force me into an arranged marriage.
Unless they are way worse looking than me and I feel I've been ripped off, I'd probably feel fine. There are advantages to searching for the perfect mate, but it usually ends in misery LOL and arranged marriages generally work out well with lot's of healthy kids, so I'd probably be fine with it tbh, save me a lot of time looking and being anxious
If there's no chemistry between us I would ask her if she wanted to run away with me, so we both could decide what to do with our lives later.Realistically, if it's a cultural thing, we grew up with this in mind and we would just... automatically accept it as the next step.
Extremely negatively (traumatized, etc) but only because I’d have to marry and sleep with someone I don’t know, don’t trust, and don’t love. Not because they’re average-looking, I couldn’t care less about that.
I rather kiss this oneLiberty or death!
If I were raised in a culture that had arranged marriages, I probably would be more focused on my wifely duties than being sexually attracted to my partner. As it is... that'd basically be rape in my mind aka extremely traumatizing for me.
It’s tragic I don’t know them to have an intimate connection. I’m not bothered by them being average looking. I’m assuming I’m virgin if this is an arranged marriage. So I’d likely be nervous and worried about pain
i voted very positively. Sex with an average looking person is better than no sex.
However they look, I don't see myself having sex with some Stranger. Maybe after knowing them to a certain emotional level... but it will take time. So, I'll feel negative either way.
i would feel violated regardless if he’s a greek god or not. its my choice to marry and sleep with who i want.
The whole idea of an arranged marriage is that both parties, the bride and the groom, agree to it. This sounds a lot more like a forced marriage, where you don't seem to have a choice, by the way your putting it. And in a lot of places that's not legal.
Average is better than some things I have had sex with so you know, I’m not against it. Just as long as I love them. If I feel “meh” about it, then we can rock-paper-scissors for it.
Was it a marriage that joined two warring nations and saved thousands of lives. No? Then I would not consent to an arranged marraige.
I am going all the way and not pulling out. Babies will be made with my average wife
Nope. My parents would never do that. Even their marriage was a love marriage. In our family We are free to choose our life partners.
If you were only 12 years old you would probably feel pretty scared.
I'm not allowing an arranged marriage to happen. I'm running off.
As long as there is no fault divorce/no loss of assets it sounds like fun to most guys. A fun night in Vegas.Next week it’s divorce time
In most arranged marriages, people aren't allowed to get divorced
If you don’t want to be married to someone then how they look is the least of your problems
I don't really care much about how she looks. What matters is how we connect.I don't think I can marry a stranger, so I wouldn't have sex. I'd just go off to sleep.
Being a man, I can not think of any way I could be forced into an arranged marriage.From what I have been told by a few people I know that had arranged marriages, most had a period to get to know the person they where to marry and the ones that did not meet their spouse until a few days before the wedding.They in either case, where not really expected to consummate the marriage the night of the wedding. Now I do not know if this is the case of all cultures where arranged marriages still occur, but it would seem to me that a period of adjustment would be given before the marriage was consummated.
I'd say, Mixed. It'd all depend not just on her looks, but her personality! What would truly matter is Does SHE like me?
I voted Neutral although I could not ever begin to enter a marriage unless I was in love with the woman.
Damn I meant to click extremely negative/ traumatized.
What did you click instead?
Negative, but still I’d be super uncomfortable.
I think I, and most guys, are satisfied with average. I imagine most girls however are not.
They are if you have money.
All healthy straight men who aren't elderly want to have sex with a woman.
The VAST MAJORITY of people are average looking. Only idiots refuse to realize that.
I would never be in an arranged marriage! That's what they do in third world countries!
Back in the medieval days when that was common I'd deal with it. Today? To hell with that.
I'd hit it, but only like, two times. Three would be too much
Negative, but I would try to build a better relationship with her over time. Also, I’m okay with average looks.
Why be in an arranged marriage to begin with if there so chemistry between you two in the first place and she don’t make you happy or what you want.
I accepted the cultural tradition of arranged marriage. I understood that the purposes of it were to keep wealth in the hands of those who already possessed it and the belief, comical as it proved to be, that our bloodlines were somehow superior to commoners. Example: The humourous Prince Charles. I accepted agreed to my ordinary looking, royal blood wife and was obligated by the culture to give her offspring to carry our bloodlines forward. I would not expect much in the line of recreational sex from her because the Vatican's post-Biblical theologies, including the celebacy of Priests, starting in the 1100s, severely restricted the appetite of high born women for sex beyond procreation. But that was OK. The culture also accepted that I could have romantic and sexual dalliances without condition, because the entirely patriarchal world view accepted that I would not soil my wife's virtue but could seek comfort among the courtisans circulating around the Manor.
So without all the fancy talk, you are saying you are shallow and a cheater. Niiiiiicceeee!
@anametouse No, I am noI am saying that there is no fixed view from one culture to the next.
The world really did exist prior to 1997 and sorted things out differently.
Yea. Good thing we don't stone people anymore
Also 1996, you were close
@anametouse Close enough.
@anametouse n "Good thing we don't stone people anymore."But they did not have to worry about #metoo. Good when men unconditionally ran things, yes?
Nobody is dead from #metooI'd say that's progress
Fuck that i would say no im not fuck u mom & dad I aont doin it & i wouldn't do it
I'd be okay with it. There actually IS a selection process when it comes to finding someone for an arranged marriage.
did you vote?
And voting has to do with what, exactly?
On the poll
I would be relieved to have sex after how long it's been but I would quickly divorce as I don't want to be forced
Divorce is usually prohibited in cultures with forced marriages
I would flee the country
I feel like it’s time to throw some Barry White on and do it!
I dont think I would have erection at all. I would lose it
Im below average in appearance so if they want sex during thw honeymoon ill happily dissappoint them quicker
Even if it was a good looking person I’d feel like shit and probably wouldn’t do it 🤷♀️
I would enjoy the sex and if its arranged, I'd learn to love the girl I'm married to and having sex with.
Id feel optimistic. Well its a new possibility. I feel its not necessary to have sex on the first night.
I would be happy to get the shag, not so happy about being married
Being Forced to get married would traumatize me, I'd be put in prison before the night is up.
I’d run away before the wedding I’m not cattle to trade for.
Hell no! I never wished to marry. Now I have to worry about someone else!
Honestly, I would be very confused because how the hell did I get myself into this? Also, I would first like to know her and how she feels about this whole damn thing. If we can both agree on a divorce because it's not what we both want. I will be honest with her that once the honeymoon is over, Im out of this marriage and we can both still be friends (most times, the lady wouldn't want to be in a similar situation too). Depending on how traditional or open she is, I wouldn't mind having protected sex with her as long as we both agree that it's platonic and enjoy the rest of the 'honeymoon' as friends with benefits lol
Well it would be better than never having sex or getting to be a father.
We're not sure average looking person can have non average Dick size or Tight pussy
The whole experience seems like a downward rollercoaster, especially since you are forced into it!
Unless his forcing you id say just go into bed and sleep
if she is super horny and turns me on.. I have no problem with it
"Required"? Like, is someone standing over you?
@Ellie-V The spouse might force you because it's their "right" (I know it's so wrong)
I feel like I’m being raped
Why not enjoy it?
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