I jerk off thinking about my crush that rejected me. Is it immoral? Will this make me harder to let go or forget about her?

lunchonly
Hi Im from Singapore I have been rejected my by crush for pass a year , she was my college mate , she used to like me but later on, I got rejected because i was too slow to get her , she got bored with me , basically is when she have feelings to me , I wasn't ready, when I started to have real feelings to her , she ran away.

I feel a BIG regret of not loving her enough, so we have been quiet for months then slowly became friends again, but not normal friends, as in the way she talk or react to my friends are much openly , like playing and different compare to me, sometimes we dont even talk for a week , sometimes she hates me for no reason , its like a wave. on and off. Unless we have fun like drinking or a trip then we will talk more

I like her is that , im the only one in college find her attractive, I dont know why, she is a out going person who goes drinking with friends often , like socailing, energetic person , hyperactive person, strong independant and girl that is quite open on wearing clothes sometimes And thats why recently i have been jerking off thinking about her because i know i can't get her, of course i didn't download her picture and do it. Just thinking with while watching other porn. So she is a hyperactive person and more hyperactive when she's a bit drunk , she likes to wear those girl's short pants so sometimes i will accidentally saw her panties when she move her legs and her butt cheeks , thats turn me on and sometimes the t-shirt she wears i can see her bra she's wearing. But not always , she's a quite strong independant so she's quite a protective kind of person not always wearing sexy outfit , she's still a virgin thou and haven't been through a relationship before. just lost her first kiss

So is it a guilty pleasure jerking off thinking about her? or immoral because a lot of my friends told me that she wasn't into me anymore and asked me to let go , so i dont know will this cause me harder to forget about her? and is this lust or love?
I jerk off thinking about my crush that rejected me. Is it immoral? Will this make me harder to let go or forget about her?
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