How to overcome penis size insecurity so it does not affect my relationships or my mental health? (Story for context) Penile dysmorphic disorder?

Anonymous
Im a grower in penis size: very small when flaccid (soft) and average when hard, at best. This has always been my most crippling insecurity, especially when in a relationship. If I ever felt the girl said something about penis size in general, or made me feel even more insecure about my size somehow (directly or indirectly), I would find myself growing resentful towards her. And I would always feel way to embarrassed and emasculated by these insecure thoughts, so I never brought up how I felt about my size, as I felt I could never bounce back.

However, 2 months ago we were on the phone and she was asking me if I was satisfied with my body and if I would change anything. She went from body part to body part, and finally asked if I was satisfied with my penis. Mortified, I initially said I was satisfied and she seemed so eager about me sending her a picture of my penis and body and calling me boring for not wanting to. But eventually, I bring up the question again and say I'm actually not satisfied with my size... to which she replied,"why would you tell me that?" As if she was offended. But went with the flow and asked,"thinner, thicker? Shorter, longer?" And I just said bigger... to which she said "oh well I think every guy wants that. I've had bigger and it can hurt."

The topic has never come up again, and we've had lots of sexy talks over the phone and text since. However, this question and subject has been like poison for my mind. I still can't shake this off, and I find myself becoming very distant and resentful towards her sometimes, to where it actually affects her as well. Though she doesn't know the real reason behind it.

Lets be mature about this.
I am hoping other girls or guys can give some input on the subject. Maybe their own experiences, or similiar feelings felt in this manner, or advice on how to accept myself more and be ok with my size. Perhaps this is penile dysmorphic disorder?
How to overcome penis size insecurity so it does not affect my relationships or my mental health? (Story for context) Penile dysmorphic disorder?
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