Am I confused? Why is this happening?

[Anonymous]

So I believe that I am straight. I’m very much attracted to men and want to be married to a man one day. I’ve also have always been a hopeless romantic who fantasizes (EVERYDAY) about how I’ll meet him and how we’ll fall in love...
When I was younger, two of my neighbors (who were girls) used to kiss on my neck and suck on my nipples. But I think even they were too young to know what was happening so there was never oral sex or kissing on the mouth. That probably went on for a year.
Fast forward to my teen masturbating days... I couldn’t get wet to any type of porn that seemed super fake or dramatic and the only kind that would make me wet is lesbian porn (if at least one orgasm was genuine). Lesbian porn became my go-to category, and I’d fast forward through the kissing parts and just orgasm when they did. I think I watch it because it seems like their reactions are real and I’m trying to feel what they’re feeling (it’s hard to explain).
Also, I’ve only had sex like 20times in my life and a guy has never made me cum (could be because of my anxiety, idk). I’ve never been with a girl and the thought of kissing one and especially having oral sex, GROSSES me out! However, maybe twice a year I’ll randomly have a dream of me being with a girl and then I’ll wake up. It always weirds me out because I dont want to be with a female.
I want the dreams to stop but I’m wondering why they’re happening. could I be suppressing feelings? Or is this normal? Even typing this is making me uncomfortable because I really don’t want to be with a woman and I’m afraid that’s what people’s opinions will say. But... what do you guys think?

[lackconscience1116]

Oh Darlin'! You are completely normal. Nothing you wrote is evidence of you wanting to be with girls vs. guys. Most women would prefer to look at a naked chic vs a naked man. Statistically the majority of women who do watch porn find it arousing because they IDENTIFY with the woman, hence you cumming when she cums. Orgasming via just intercourse is a learned skill that more woman than you would have guessed haven't mastered. In a way... you have to teach yourself. Plenty of resources out there😊 Now all of that being said, what you need to do is relax!!! Don't fight yourself, don't judge, and don't panic. First of all, growing up (minus you're experience with your neighbors) I felt the same about all those things and became convinced I was a lesbian if not then bi. I tried out the girl on girl thing and it was sooo not for me, which shocked me. Obviously, some aspects were very enjoyable but other things not for me and something was missing 😂The thing is I would have wondered what I was missing since I was feeling so conflicted about it. I am not saying you have to go be with a girl to find out. Am I highly recommending it? Yes. Clears things right up. Most importantly, learn to be okay with yourself. If you prefer woman, no biggie.. literally not even close to what people are hatin' on these days. If it's a religious thing... well as respectful as I can be I'll say this... f*** that. I can't picture a God who would want someone to live in self loathing making themselves and everyone else miserable because their version of love doesn't jive with "man's religion". Just be you because life is too long for regrets and being alone. Good luck! 😃☺️😊

[nerms123]

I think you’re just like 1% gay and it’s nothing to worry about and completely normal. I mean you’re 99% straight.

[MrOracle]

I think it's likely that you're occasionally dreaming about women because you're used to watching lesbian porn, so you see a lot of women sexually, and your brain remembers. But I wouldn't put too much importance on that.

The real issue is your anxiety, and your apparent inability to open up with a guy and build some trust with him so that you can relax and let go and let yourself enjoy sex (and I don't just mean penetration, but everything). It seems clear to me that you long for that, but you are also afraid of it for some reason, and there's really no reason to be afraid. You're a woman now, and can make the decision to have sex when you want to, and it isn't wrong to do so - it's completely normal and natural.

What you need is a relationship where you can build trust with the guy, and you can be open with him about your anxiety and your desires and you can explore things together and give real, honest feedback to each other without worry or guilt and without being offended. That's true with anyone, by the way - you can't really have truly great sex until you can be fully open with your partner and let go of your worries and insecurities and just be in the moment and letting the pleasure wash over you and carry you away. That's what you need more than any of the other stuff.

[harvest]

I don't think you're a lesbian. You are just very emotional person. That kind of people tend to have problem reaching orgasms since they need emotional bond to actually feel something. Simple fucking isn't gonna cut it. That's why you have problem cumming watching "classic" porn.
Try watching more sensual and emotional porn, but with guys. There is a lot of them. Try it out. If you succeed with it, let me know :)

[Somethingwittty]

Okay look. Your sexuality is something you're just gonna have to experiment with. You won't know what you really like unless you try it. But you have time for this. So just try some stuff and try and have fun with things.

[boumka]

It's absolutely normal, your imagination is running this kind of dream nit necessarily because of any lust for women, looking for lesbians porn is more bout girl enjoying them selfs than a relationship.
Don't bother too munch with what make you exited, it's nearly impossible to change this consciously. Just enjoy what you want to enjoy, the more your at ease with your lust, the more you will understand it and enjoy it more. As for your relationship with mens, look for your own need and lusts in real life sex/relation and go with the flow of what you are. Going against yourself will only make you sad.

[MannySimms]

This will be exciting for you! Approach the possibilities slowly with people you trust. Find people that want to make YOU cum. You'll find out what floats your boat and stop wasting time.

So, things that happen in youth remain forever? Freud was right!

[FakeName123]

Porn industry has long figured out that men replace the male actor during the clip (thus plenty of PoV clips for men). Women on the other hand emphatise with the actress (es). That's also why written porn is much more successful among women.

So you are correct in your assumption. Same with your dreams. Essentially you are placing yourself into the position of the woman you are seeing and how she would feel and sorta recreate it.

[mrhappy69]

I sugest you try it whit a girl, after you have done it you will know if you like them or not

[Twalli]

Try it. If you just want to know what vh it's like there's no problem. Homosexuality is not an action but a sexual attraction.

[Cloudsofnevermore]

You just need a good man with his tongue... I am sure it will have good results.