Is this real trauma?

[Anonymous]

I've never really talked about it because I always feel like other people have things worse so me being upset is crazy and that its nothing really. Ever since I was a little kid my uncle would make me walk on his back and on his face and sometimes stand on his dick when we were alone. I was in elementary school and only new enough that I new that was supposed to hurt guys. He never took off his pants or anything. Would just make me stand on him. As I got older it would make me feel more and more uncomfortable. I started lashing out and I would kick him when he would have me step on him. He would have people step on him during family gatherings to "straighten out his back" as he would say. He would have me do it while others were around and when I'd lash out my aunt would yell at me. I never even knew why it made me so upset. He would have my mom do it sometimes and I would try and push her off and tear up.

As I got older he would pick me up from school sometimes and he would pull off to the side take off my shoes and socks and sniff my feet and rub them all over his face. He would sometimes even rub them on the outside of his pants.

The time he really scared me I was in high school and he came to fix my computer. He said I needed to step on him as thanks and he started to lick my feet and rub it all over his face. I asked what he was doing and he said cleaning them. I was so scared.

After that I distance myself from him as much as possible. In my head I feel like this was molestation but he never touched me or did anything under his pants so I've never felt confident in saying that. I feel that it is not really trauma and that I'm crazy because so many other people have had so much worse happen to them. I honestly get scared anytime anyone I dont trust goes near my feet.

[morecow]

If you would like to know if it's trauma a pretty easy litmus test is to ask yourself, "do I feel traumatized by this?"
Now if you're interested in an outside perspective on this, independent of your feelings, I would be completely fucking livid if I found out someone was doing anything like that to a friend or family member. That is your uncle, and it certainly sounds like he's into feet and was deriving sexual pleasure from it. That is not an acceptable way for a man to act towards any young girl, much less one related to him. If I knew you, I'd recommend telling your mother about that, as in the full story. I think you're very justified in having felt afraid. Having an adult make you do things for their own sexual pleasure is a very scary experience in general and I don't think anything you felt is strange or wrong. Also, just because "worse" has happened to someone else doesn't mean your situation is suddenly acceptable. Imagine if that's how the world worked- like you call the police after you get assaulted and they showed up and were like dude quit being a pussy someone got murdered like a day ago this isn't even that bad. That'd be madness.

[crmoore]

That is most definitely trauma and that is most definitely molestation. You have every right to call it either of those things. Sure, there may be some people who have had it worse than you, but you have likely had it worse than a majority of people. What he did was not okay by any means. Remember this: just because some people get murdered, doesn't mean someone who only got stabbed isn't a victim. Being stabbed is still terrible, regardless of other people having been murdered. I'm truly sorry to hear that you went through this and I wish you the absolute best of luck in overcoming it.

[Ken201]

Yes that is real bad trama. My cousin went to jail for making his daughter do that naked.

Is an nasty fetish and now his girl had a horrible honeymoon cause she freaked when her husband wanted to be romantic kissing her up her body as he got on the bed. She never told him her issue it killed thier marriage till after counciling they finally had sex.

[sheepdip]

Yup, trauma and molestation. Go to the police.

[Anonymous]

It certainly sounds like trauma to me, but I'm not a doctor. Everyone's experiences are unique to them. Just because someone else had something "worse" done to them, doesn't negate your experience. If you were affected that deeply, don't be afraid to talk to someone about it. A professional. It can help a lot.