Is it possible to have a crush on someone without being sexually attracted to them?

Anonymous

I've been told by some people that this guy has a crush on me but I don't know him. I'm not attractive and there's nothing sexually appealing about me.

Without those things, can you really call it a crush?

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Most Helpful Guys

Miristheiss Master
+1 y
I knew a girl who was just adorable.
A bubbly, fun personality, so pretty, always smiling.
I loved to talk with her.
She was just so big.
I couldn't fully want her as a girlfriend type.
If she were just smaller than hell yeah.
She is married though, some guy likes her body too, she never got smaller. She is probably at least 200.
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Anonymous
+1 y
Carefully pushing anonymous button. There is one male screen actor that I have an unusual fixation on. I generally wish I was him and I will admit that if I were gay. he'd be at the top of the page. You might say that I have a non-sexual crush on him.
0 1 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  Who Is the actor
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Its as much his temperament as his image. He does what the hell he wants.
- Asker
  +1 y
  You didn't know his name? That's Matthew Mcconaughey
- Show All Show Less
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Yep. The Lincoln Lawyer., Mudd. When I grow up, I want to be him.
- Asker
  +1 y
  I just find it weird how you posted his picture instead of just saying his name lol
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Comes across a little like Paul Newman.
- Asker
  +1 y
  Okay...
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  I use graphics a lot when I post.

Most Helpful Girls

WonderingElf Xper 2
+1 y
Hey! You might not find yourself appealing, attractive or sexy but that doesn’t mean it’s true. As a saying goes “the beauty is in the eyes of the beholder”. Do you know why these people tell you he has a crush on you? Does he stare at you? Does he talk about you? What’s the deal?
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't know, I never asked but apparently he said something to them
- WonderingElf
  +1 y
  If you are curious or even interested why don’t you hang around with him? For example, go to those people he talks (and told you he likes you) and hang out with all of them. Maybe you’ll find out more!
- Asker
  +1 y
  I get what you're saying but I don't care that much lol, besides we don't work anywhere near other
Anonymous
+1 y
It’s very possible. You really like the person and their personality and you’re genuinely interested in becoming better acquainted with zero sexual desire. Sexual attraction stems from the physical. There is a such thing as being mentally attracted to someone
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  How is that different than liking someone as a friend?
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  If I like you as a friend that means I would never consider being in a relationship with you. As a Christian woman I am currently in a relationship with a man who I am attracted to, but have never once thought about having intercourse with him. Don’t get me wrong, we have feelings for one another but it stems from love, care, and our bond through Christ. If sex is important to you or you dwell on sexual desires then things such as the topic sexual attraction will be more prevalent to you.
- Asker
  +1 y
  How do people know when they're attracted to someone?
- Show All Show Less
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Well if we’re together then there’s definitely a degree of attraction. (People tend to give the word attraction a sexual connotation—so not the case here). Attraction means that you’re interested/like the other person... which should be enough to tell you how everything else will play out after marriage! 😊
- Asker
  +1 y
  But being interested/liking someone applies to different things. A person could just like someone as a friend
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  True. But, not in my case. 😊
- Asker
  +1 y
  But if the feeling your describing is the same, why are you more than friends with them?
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Because I am attracted to them.
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Are you attracted to your friends? No. You just like them and have a platonic relationship with them. If you meet someone and the two of you like each other and create feelings for one another or they have qualities that you want in a partner then you would consider dating or being in a relationship with this person.
- Asker
  +1 y
  All this just sounds confusing. I guess I'll just never understand what it means to be attracted to someone because if you take sex out if the equation, to me it just sounds like a friendship because I always thought that if you're attracted to someone, it means you desire to have sex with them (whether or not you would is a different story)

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What Girls & Guys Said

6 20

meesegoMoo Yoda
+1 y
Men can become sexually attracted after developing feelings. It can be as though you can do that sort of thing, even though it's not the primary goal.
0 1 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't understand how people can develop feelings for randoms that they don't even know
- meesegoMoo
  +1 y
  Does he know your laugh, or a speech you made? Has he seen the way you treat people? Or, maybe you're hotter than you realize.
- Asker
  +1 y
  He literally doesn't know anything about me and there's nothing hot about me
- Show All Show Less
- meesegoMoo
  +1 y
  Don't doubt what men can find hot! Some people have extremely specific and strange tastes. For almost any variation of any human body part, there exists a man who obsesses over it.
- Asker
  +1 y
  Maybe he's one of those people that's into ugly chicks that look like a man
- meesegoMoo
  +1 y
  He certainly isn't impressed by your confidence. Yoowwza! And women who look like skinny men have always done well. It bothers me, other people try not to see it, but that's how it is.
- Asker
  +1 y
  I guess he's one of those weirdos then
jennifer_bloom Master
+1 y
When I like somebody that is average looking or even very attractive - I have to fall in love with them or have deep emotions towards them before I will desire sexual contact with them.
0 1 0 0
cicchis0 Xper 6
+1 y
You don't get to decide if you're attractive or sexually appealing to another person or not. If he has a crush on you then he definitely likes something about you.
0 1 1 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  No clue what that could be
- Asker
  +1 y
  There's nothing to like
- cicchis0
  +1 y
  Apparently, this guy disagrees.
  Sounds like you have some self-esteem issues. This might help you recognise and overcome the negative thought patterns you are having - documentcloud.adobe.com/.../track
- Show All Show Less
- Asker
  +1 y
  I'm not even going to bother in clicking that. I don't have self esteem issues, I'm just realistic
- cicchis0
  +1 y
  I'm not going to keep arguing with you because you have already proven my point with your contradictory statements: A) There is nothing to like about me; B) Someone has a crush on me. Your own statements prove that your self-perception is unrealistically negative, i. e. you have self-esteem issues. If you want to understand the issue, the book is there.
- Asker
  +1 y
  It's not an issue. I'm pretty sure there are times when people become fascinated with a stranger for odd reasons, it usually has nothing to do with attraction
boombastik Xper 5
+1 y
How do you know that he doesn't find your qualities appealing. There is someone out there for everyone
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  I disagree
mrhappy69 Xper 5
+1 y
Yes, sexual and romantic feelings are separate. But this is probably just that he thinks that you are hot and/or have feelings for you. You obviosly have low self asteem, and you are probably way more atractive than you Think you are. And when you have feelings for someone they seem prettier/sexier to you. AND beuty IS in the eye of the beholder, after all.
0 1 0 0
Desconhecida Editor
+1 y
If he has a crush on you, he finds you attractive
0 1 0 0
moststrangestguy Xper 5
+1 y
Yep.. It's called love
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  What if they don't know you
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Then they need to make a list of all the things there feeling ans label it and slowly work though each emotion until the fully understand what there feeling and what they want then decide systematic if they want to go for this guy or not... Or you could be female and just do everything based on the moment and say one thing and do another and be hectic then complain to all your male friends and females friends cry for 3 weeks cry some more like big fat baby then get distracted by something totally different and go off there forgetting the guy ever existed you're choices
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  You might say you'll do option A be we both know you will do options B
- Show All Show Less
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Any other questions?
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't really know what option b means but option a makes sense
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Okay
- Asker
  +1 y
  There's no way they could have a crush on me.
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Have you asked them? Directly
- Asker
  +1 y
  No, we've only spoken once and he just asked me what time I get off work
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  I like him already, maybe get in contact with him Facebook ask for his number or something
- Asker
  +1 y
  Lol, why do you like him already? And why would I do that?
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  We'll sound like you're interested but of course you expect him to make the first move... Lets be real give him a reason to make the first move and he will
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  If i met a girl on the bus and we had a small connection i ain't gonna be asking her out.. If she said hey this is my number or my Facebook call me... Yeah its on am asking her out
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Guys are idoits girls are crazy. You have to tell us directly if you like us.. I mean direct as possible and sometimes we still won't get it,
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Into society going after a girl = 30 years in prison if you're ughly and girls are crazy picky so even 7/10 guys are getting no pussy
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  So the desire to ask you out is almost fucking 0 so if you don't. Show that your interest first or even a little guyz will just ignore you because there 100 others versions of you out there
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  There only 1 of him
- Asker
  +1 y
  Why would you think I was interested? I don't want him to make a move. It's not like I want anything to happen. I just don't get how he could possibly have a crush on me
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  You're probably a really good looking cute girl with a great personality but you seem more like an attention seeking girl.. He likes you..
- Asker
  +1 y
  I'm not good looking, don't have a good personality, and I'm not an attention seeker. That's why I asked if it's possible to have a crush without attraction because attraction can't be the reason but I always thought that was the main thing that made it a crush so that's why I asked
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  He may really really really like you as a friend and wants to start a relationship with you without the sex he might be asexual or looking to improve himself and wants someone there to bounce off
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Best advice i can give you is ask him directly
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Guys might be complex mysterious puzzles but if you aim for his brain aka his dick you control him.. If you want to know what his thinking just ask him open and honestly away works with guys for. Some reason girls hate open conversations
- Asker
  +1 y
  We don't work together or anywhere near each other so I'll probably drop it
- moststrangestguy
  +1 y
  Option B then lamfo jks don't worries
ManFriday Xper 4
+1 y
In short, YES
0 0 0 0
Daniiiii2 Xper 3
+1 y
Could be
0 0 0 0
MarkusCopeland Xper 3
+1 y
"I'm not attractive and there's nothing sexually appealing about me."

In your opinion. He clearly doesn't think the same way you do.
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  Well I don't know, people in the comments are saying that a person can have a crush without being sexually attracted
- MarkusCopeland
  +1 y
  Its incredibly unlikely if that's the case. I've certainly never heard of that before.
- Asker
  +1 y
  I guess it's still possible though
- Show All Show Less
- MarkusCopeland
  +1 y
  I think you're just downplaying yourself. You don't have to think you're attractive for other people to think you are.
- Asker
  +1 y
  That's just not realistic, it's probably some other reason
- MarkusCopeland
  +1 y
  Then I don't know what to say to you. Good luck.
robertKugler Xper 5
+1 y
No crush means sexual.. or the cusp of sexual... mm. Uhh na.. ya!
0 0 0 0
GreenGold1992 Master
+1 y
Isn't that just being asexual
0 1 1 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't understand how that's different from just liking someone as a friend
manofstyle Xper 4
+1 y
You can be attracted to the person they are even if you're not attracted to the body they have. It happens all the time, especially for women
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  They don't know anything about me though
- manofstyle
  +1 y
  Then that means he thinks you are more attractive than you think you are
- Asker
  +1 y
  He might be one of those people that likes ugly chicks
- Show All Show Less
- manofstyle
  +1 y
  It's more likely that you lack self-confidence
- Asker
  +1 y
  It's more likely that he's just into ugly chicks
- manofstyle
  +1 y
  If you want to know you can post a picture for men to share opinions
- Asker
  +1 y
  Post a picture so people can tell me something I already know, yeah... no thanks
SilverRain92 Yoda
+1 y
Yeah, it's possible :)
0 0 0 0
Mamamialetmego Xper 7
+1 y
Girl you don't understand men you think like a woman. We desire someone sexually even if we don't know her. We are visual. Women have to get to know the guy to have sexual feelings.
0 1 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  There's nothing sexually appealing about me so that can't be it
- Mamamialetmego
  +1 y
  How can you know?
- Asker
  +1 y
  I have eyes
- Show All Show Less
- Mamamialetmego
  +1 y
  You are not man.
- Mamamialetmego
  +1 y
  Are you obese?
- Mamamialetmego
  +1 y
  Send me picture i will tell you
- Asker
  +1 y
  I'm nowhere near fat and I don't need to be a man to know if I'm sexually appealing
- Mamamialetmego
  +1 y
  Pm me your pic or instagram photo i will tell you
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't need you to tell me something I already know
- Mamamialetmego
  +1 y
  Pff whatever then
khurrambarkat Xper 4
+1 y
Love and sex is very different path.
If he love you than may be he feels for you in positive ways. Give him a chance. And see what will happend
0 1 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  There's no way he could love me. He doesn't know anything about me
- khurrambarkat
  +1 y
  That's the reason i told you to give him time and you too spend some time with him
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't need to do that. I'm not looking for friends
- Show All Show Less
- khurrambarkat
  +1 y
  Than leave it. This is only your choice to decide which way you want to go. We all can only give you choices
Jltakk Explorer
+1 y
I have that. I really just want companionship.
0 0 0 0
Turk288 Xper 5
+1 y
Yess
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  So if they're not attracted to the person, how is it a crush?
- Turk288
  +1 y
  You can have a crush someone without having sexually attracted. Not every crush have to be sexuall
- Asker
  +1 y
  So how is that different from just wanting to be someone's friend?
- Show All Show Less
- Turk288
  +1 y
  Being a friend you dont feel anything. But on crush you feel different your acting changes. You constantly thinking about ur crush. Its just dont have to be sexually all the time
- Asker
  +1 y
  I don't understand how that's possible
- Turk288
  +1 y
  You can like or love someone with out thinking sex.
- Asker
  +1 y
  That just sounds like a friendship or familial love to me, not a crush
Synikal Xper 6
+1 y
Yea.. feeling like sex may diminish the image immediately or the attraction. You love the qualities or features they hold. Maybe both. But at the end of the day... fuck that shit😂
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  They don't know anything about me
- Synikal
  +1 y
  Doesn't matter. Those are qualities of a crush.
- Asker
  +1 y
  I guess this isn't a crush then and they just described it incorrectly
The_man_whol_aughs Xper 5
+1 y
Yea it's called gold digging and might soon end in infidelity
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