Which is worse: an escort? Or a woman who just gets involved with men for their money?

[ManOnFire]

I got to thinking about this recently. A lot of women out there look down on escorts and men who go to them and they think it's pathetic - and I myself am not a fan of it - but when you really think about it, what is the difference between an escort and an every day woman who really just wants to use guys for their money/resources, or who actually say they want a "sugardaddy"? To me the every day woman who's looking for money is not really a lot different than the escort except that the every day woman is generally slimy and deceitful about it. The escort makes it no secret that she does what she does for money.

But what do you think?

[seansin]

I mean I'm being honest and you girls could be mad at me for this one and escorts a lot cheaper than a woman that's taking your money all the time at least you only see them once a week boom it's done these women want cards they want houses they want you no credit cards they want and most men are married that are doing this half of me you don't even see there on the internet f****** fishing you I'll tell you this after being married for 20 years I never realize how much the world changed until after my second wife left and how people are and how needy they are on the sites now nobody can go to Taco Bell anymore you got to get GrubHub or you can't go to Home Depot you got to get it on Amazon you know how much they're making people lazy all these big company to just going to make us fat so we can't take the intake off wash it away and we're going to have to bow down to him look at how politics got people hate each other on each side now Republicans used to be able to speak in college not no more not without getting a right going nobody's allowed to say what they want unless there is more powerful than the other person or have more people my grandpa said something 1990 probably around when Bill Clinton came into office well this is about as good as it's going to get it ain't going to get no better here I'm glad my life was good I hope you guys leave finishers good

[roland77]

I had one of these gold-diggers. 250 EUR gone, forever. I came over it and continued the search. And 250 isn't really much.

[LightEnd]

The thing about an escort is she's not gonna call you later saying she's having your baby, she's not going to sit around your house, complain and get fat, she's not going to bitch at you, she's not going to keep you from your hobbies and friends. she's not going to take your assets and children if she decides to take her life a different direction.

And you know exactly what to expect from her. You never know what to expect from an every day woman. Is she going to monkey branch? Is she settling for you? Is she pretending until she gets the ring? You just dont know and there are no protections for men in marriage and divorce. It's all about protecting women who are supposedly equal to us and capable of everything a man can do. It is really very confusing to say the least.

[LightEnd]

Not to mention. She makes sure she is pleasant company when she is with you. Which is all we really want. Pleasant company

[ManOnFire]

"Pleasant company" - I like the way you put that.

[LightEnd]

I think that's what women forget. When they are trying to catch you they are always smiling, accommodating and pleasant. After she locks you down it's like a whole different person comes out, at least in my experience.

[Anime27]

Everyone’s saying they’re the same thing... they’re not. 1) you have to book an escort who generally has a pay rate. YOU are the one who is allowing her to be involved in your life by hiring and paying her. It’s a business transaction. Where as “an everyday woman” is using a mans feelings and emotional attachment to her to get what she wants. A woman who is with a man for money generally doesn’t love the person but will put out sex etc to ensure the charade keeps going in order to keep getting what she wants. The only person who is bad in this situation is the “everyday woman” as she’s kiniving, manipulating and just plain selfish but the escort is just doing her job.

[ManOnFire]

Exactly.

[roland77]

Exactly that happened to me with one. I could expose her here right now, but that is against law (real name) and her family name is rare.

[ariadneR]

I think the everyday woman is worse.
With the escort both parties know what they are getting involved with.
Funny thing is, with the women that use men, they're the same ones that cry foul when they're on the receiving end.
As my mum says "do so, dont like so"

[ManOnFire]

I wanna meet your mom❤️

[bellapizza]

And men use women for sex

[ariadneR]

@manonfire She'd like you

[roland77]

@bellapizza Same with woman, not only us. And beside, I'm not using my girlfriend for sex, it is natural for us being a heterosexual couple (both) to make love one day.

[Justacatlady]

I think a woman who dated a person based on their financial ability to support her is awful.

[howlinsilently]

The second one as is not aware of her actions

[BrownBratzDoll]

Ure branwashed and dumb lol

[BrownBratzDoll]

That makes u smart not dumb

[BrownBratzDoll]

Or awful

[howlinsilently]

Why thankyou,... I think. Just to clarify. I mrant in essence that to mean that while the hooker is laying down clear terms- money for sex. This definition is not as clear with many relationships i have witnessed where the love is only there when the purse is filled to satifaction

[BrownBratzDoll]

@howlinsilenty and whats wrong with that? Some of us women pussy can only get wet for men who provide for us and cherish us. Not all women are a bottomless pit with no boundaries or standards for their pussies.

[howlinsilently]

Nothing as long as it is clear between the two, i have no problems at all. I lost over mill to a junkie years ago and as i was in depression i sort of knew what was going on and asked her but was denied, i felt bad that i was allowing this to go on because i needed her company, she needed my money for smak, wjat i didn't need was to be charged, with the burglaries she did and the stolen stuff in my car boot. Too much time for no crime. Lol. I learnt then to not accept nothing less than the actions matching the words. Xx

[Love2Jackit]

The difference is with an escort u know what 2 expect. When a woman who uses a man for his money. He doesn't know he's being lied 2. Worse he may think he's in love. No the knowing thier is no love 2 be had. Another big difference is u know not have feelings or compassion for an escort. Where as a woman thats using u. U may have compassion for cause u don't realize u r being used. That's the problem in 2 day world. 2 many women think they have the right 2 use a man.

[Bee-Hatch]

It's the same thing in different terms.

[Rocky_Jocky57]

What's the difference? aren't they both after the same thing?

[MrNameless]

the difference is you know what you're getting yourself into with the escort.. when the other option just plays with your emotions and wastes your time and money

[worldscolide]

The difference is, with one, sex is guaranteed, with the other it is not..

[roland77]

@worldscolide Yes, that is also a real thing. ;-) If the prostitutes for example, allows anal, no guarantee that your girlfriend will allow it. Please don't get me wrong, anal sex is very emotional to a woman and it is a very large trust thing, too.

[CharlieBadger]

Neither of them is bad in my opinion.

[roland77]

If you can spare millions of EUR/USD?

[CharlieBadger]

@roland77 No idea what you are asking or your point.

[roland77]

"Neither of them is bad in my opinion." - This implies that those "gold-diggers" (one partner only out for money for the other partner) are better than escorts, where the rates are known.

[CharlieBadger]

@roland77 There is no implication to that at all. I'm not even sure how you could infer that from my statement considering my statement draws a specific equivalent between the two and states that in my opinion I don't find either to be bad.

[Sayitagain]

I’d generally say the latter. However there are variables not considered here that could be important. Is the girl who dates someone for money “findomming” the guy? If so, then his enjoyment and consent to such exploitation makes it’s totally fine. The escort however, I fail to see what is “bad” about that to begin with. It’s not an easy nor safe profession for the greater majority I’d guess, but in terms of morality I don’t see anything inherently wrong with it per se.

[roland77]

We all have desire and lust, even those who deny it to themselves and/or partners. Humans are no robots (and even those can develop some sense of emotions, general AI of course).

[englisc]

That's like asking which is worse? Stepping in dog shit or cow shit?

[Anoniemus]

Women aren’t like that everyday. But the men know that they’re with an escort.

[OlderAndWiser]

I think that gold diggers and sugar babies are simply whores in sheep's clothing.

[ManOnFire]

That is pretty much the same way I envision it as you describe, yes.

[SarahsSummer]

which is worse? aren't they the same thing? I mean both the guy and the girl are getting exactly what they want out of the "relationship"

[ManOnFire]

Most men who are with women only interested in money are not really getting good sex out of that "relationship."

[SarahsSummer]

then why are they in that "relationship"? And aren't the escorts only in it for the money?

[ManOnFire]

You have a lot of men who just settle to be in a relationship because they think it'll be hard to find someone else. Escorts are in it for the money but are honest about what they're providing and what they're expecting. Slimy every day women just using a guy for money are not gonna tell him that.

[SarahsSummer]

Ok. Let’s dissect your assertions. “You have a lot of men who just settle to be in a relationship because they think it'll be hard to find someone else.” those men, wouldn’t really care whether she’s escort or gold digger because he is “settling” either way. Unless the guy is a complete dunce, he wouldn’t continue to pay for a gold digger if she didn’t provide at least the illusion of being a girlfriend and from what I know of escorts Their job is to provide the illusion of a girlfriend “experience”. So whether she sends him a bill to stick around or she sticks around because he’s paying her bills, he gets the same experience. If there is a difference, it would be in that mans mind to decide and largely depend on his intelligence.

[ManOnFire]

You aren't dissecting a single thing. "those men, wouldn’t really care whether she’s escort or gold digger because he is “settling” either way." - That isn't making a lot of sense, seeing as men would never for an escort even if/when they go to one. They go to one because they want to, not because they have to. "Unless the guy is a complete dunce, he wouldn’t continue to pay for a gold digger if she didn’t provide at least the illusion of being a girlfriend and from what I know of escorts Their job is to provide the illusion of a girlfriend “experience”." - They're paying for them a lot of times because they're trapped in the mindset of not wanting to lose them, and even have some hope that she will eventually love him for who he is. Not all escorts do GFE, and will even have that unchecked on their list of services on their web pages. For those kinds of escorts they're making it clear that they're not interested in pretending and simply want to give sex for money. You have some more learning about escorts you should do.

[SarahsSummer]

I’ll pass. Either way the women are capitalizing on a mans need. If you have an issue with either of these women, spend your time educating the men.

[ManOnFire]

That's not a good comeback, as I clearly show that the every day woman is the one we should take issue with, not the escort. Blaming men is any easy answer, instead of actually educating women not to exploit a guy just for his resources.

[SarahsSummer]

Why do you need to take issue with either type of women? You are either an intelligent and confident enough man to not choose neither or you aren't. It takes two to tango.

[ManOnFire]

So does this same logic apply to women who take issue with men who use them for sex? Or are they somehow exempt? She is either intelligent or confident enough not to choose them, right? Especially if she later on realizes that he's just using her but she keeps him around anyway? Does it take two to tango for her too?

[SarahsSummer]

Of course, Every adult can be responsible for their own actions. I never advocate being in any relationship where you aren't getting your needs met and yet some stay anyway. That's on them. While I may try to help or educate someone, I won't judge them.

[roland77]

@SarahsSummer Also to you, please don't misunderstand it. A prostitute/escort woman is hired for money for her services the customer agrees with (not demands, that is a basis to throw him/her out, yes, also "her"). While all-day woman (read: not being a prostitute/escort/porn star) being into gold-digging (what he means) is by far more worse as she abuses his emotions and feelings for her into gaining money from him. Sure sex is poor because she isn't after that or only uses it for making him soft (not weak) in heart.

[SarahsSummer]

@roland77 just like assholes, everybody has their own opinion. I didn’t ask to see either. from you.

[roland77]

I respect other opinions, if they are well formed. Just like "males give better blowjobs than women" from a gay is not right and I surely oppose it as I got great blowjobs from women. But that is a little OT. As I said: A prostitute is hired for her services and payed at her rates, she accepts. My friend got discounts from one as a returning customer, her choice. While a gold-digger does not have known rates, it is unknown until he/she starts grabbing money from their partner.

[Mellontikos]

The Escort is a business transaction. You know exactly what you are paying for and you get what you paid for.

[Robbey]

Dishonesty is typically worse.

[SydneySentinel]

The User is worse.

[SydneySentinel]

With an escort, both parties know they're getting involved with.

[ManOnFire]

Exactly.

[Mickey9999]

Not exactly true. Since men are outright paying for services that both parties agree upon, men look at them as property or less than... hence why so many are assaulted on a regular basis. If it were only about paid sex, more women would probably use it as a career choice rather than be forced into it. Also look at the whole sex trade... it’s about young girls and women... don’t hear a lot about men getting abducted although I’m sure it happens but women are a higher commodity in that world. So your user still has the best end of it because deceitful or not, she most often gets what she wants without repercussions

[ManOnFire]

@Mickey9999 "Since men are outright paying for services that both parties agree upon, men look at them as property or less than... hence why so many are assaulted on a regular basis." - No, men look at them for exactly what these women put themselves out there for: providing sexual service. Also, the escorts/hookers who are assaulted generally are those dispatched by pimps and are often on drugs. Independent escorts with zero violent experiences are not uncommon. "If it were only about paid sex, more women would probably use it as a career choice rather than be forced into it." - In the United States the majority of escorts are not forced into it, and many of them do make it a career with legit websites. Here in the Washington D. C. region it is actually a thing. "So your user still has the best end of it because deceitful or not, she most often gets what she wants without repercussions" - Which is what makes her worse than an actual escort.

[Mickey9999]

I wasn’t arguing and i still stand behind my comments although I’m sure there’s truth to your points, there’s truth to mine also. My point was to not idealize the escort/prostitution option just because the user is deceitful. It’s not all fun and glory for the escorts.

[ManOnFire]

@Mickey9999 It isn't about idealizing them. It's about taking the time to actually think and compare the situations. For you as a woman your explanation seems sound, to me as a man who can be exposed to both kinds of women, there's a choice to make that can be very clear cut.

[Mickey9999]

Very true that men are exposed to both. It’s easy to get off exact subject but as a woman with my opinion I don’t see the issue as clear cut because as men deal with that issue, women deal with being used for their bodies which is tied into the escort bit of your question. While your decision is an I better of paying for sex directly or risking paying indirectly by dating someone that may only want me for my money. Women ask themselves just as often is this man interested in me or does he just want sex? If Sex occurs and i get impregnated, will he stay or run. Same questions have been going on since the human race began existence unfortunately and it won’t end because there will always be those users (males or females). And as we age and gain more personal wealth, both sexes ask those questions of being used for their financial fortunes no matter how shallow or deep the checkbook is.

[ManOnFire]

@Mickey9999 There is a difference between an escort willfully providing her body to be used for sex, and a woman who just gets used by a guy for sex. While I do think it's terrible for a woman to be used by a slimy guy for sex, to be honest I can't take it that seriously because a lot of women especially today are playing with men just for sex themselves. And pride themselves on how easy it is to get it. Women hate it if men think of them as being easy, when in truth women are the ones who think of men as being easy way more than we think it about them. Also, any time a woman wants to go out and get laid most people just say she can and that it will be easy enough for her. If a man is trying to go out and just get sex, most people just think of him as being desperate and horny. So at the end of the day it's kind of hard for me to really take it all that seriously when women are actually having the nerve to try to talk about how awful it is to be used for sex.

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 It's so weird to me that when two people have sex and one demands payment from the other, feminists think the person demanding payment is the one being used.

[Mickey9999]

@4mazing I think that’s more of a liberal view. The assumption that all people requesting money for sex are forced into the position with it not being a choice. Frankly don’t we all pay for it? I was the bread winner in my 20+ year marriage.

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Respect for that, but you're hardly representative. I think men have it worse. As a man, you really need to have your shit together to get a date. As a woman, you just have to freshen up. Actually, you don't even really need to freshen up. I just marvel at how easy it is for women to obtain intimacy, financial support, shelter, a friendly ear, a shoulder to cry on, etc. etc. etc. All based on the fact that they have a vagina. Meanwhile men are literally dying homeless or jumping in front of trains. Where I live, over 80% of suicides are men. I know so many good guys who are just terminally single. They have no hope. Women just don't find them attractive enough. I also know an attractive guy who has had sex with hundreds of women. The distribution is just way more skewed than it is for women. So unless you're in that select group of guys, it just sucks.

[Mickey9999]

@4mazing okay so maybe I’m the odd woman out so to speak but I’m not judging women against men nor am I trying to get sympathy for my gender as a whole. I feel for those men. But i also find myself asking how high of standards they also had. Most discussions on here are of great bodies and acceptable faces. I think there is a maturity level in most people that click at different stages of life or even different ages that tell you there’s more importance than the face and body. We all have our ideals in our heads but if that’s all we accept, we miss out on some fabulous people. With that said, even I myself having been the breadwinner most likely wouldn’t do it again. It was not a happy marriage on my part having to become basically his mother due to heath and drug problems. Iiterally would have preferred to have been taken care of a bit rather than the bread maker and the decision maker. It would have been nice to contribute to the household finances rather than have all the pressure on solely me for decades. I sympathize with men because I hate waking to an alarm and having to go to work every day. But for as many men as you say are terminally single there’s just as many women in the same situation. The ones that get picked over for their prettier friends. The ones that are too bitch looking or don’t wear makeup the list goes on and on. I’m still not saying one is better off than the other I’m Just trying to point out that both sides have their problems and the same lost hope. If people stopped looking for their ideal looking person and started looking for their compatible one, perhaps more would have hope and options.

[Mickey9999]

@mazing I’d actually like to mention a few things on what you just said but have to run because I think you have made a very valid point with the assumed ease of support due to having a vagina

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Again, I admire what you did and appreciate your reasonableness. And agree that it's better to "satisfice" than to "maximize" when looking for a partner. You're probably partly right with the standards thing too. I used to think women had it worse than men, then I started thinking it was 50/50. But what changed it for me was witnessing women dating. Just witnessing my female friends, who are by no means stunners - one is actually quite a butch lesbian/bisexual. But she got hit on out of the blue by a professional soccer player. My other friend looks. . . ordinary. She doesn't really have much going on in her life, and in my opinion she's kinda immature. But she showed me her Tinder. She has dozens of guys with model looks messaging her. It's just nuts. And that's just always the story. You know, in the past, because of my insecurity, and out of a misunderstood sense of pity, I would sometimes go talk to girls I felt sorry for, because they seemed shy or left out at a party or in town. But every single time it either turned out they had a boyfriend, or they were just generally not very interested in someone trying to be friendly to them. It's just been my experience in life that women can get whatever they need socially, whenever they want it, because there will always be guys willing to provide it. And if that fails, they have girlfriends. And if that fails, they have family. And if that fails they have colleagues. Women just don't seem out of place asking for help. Whereas guys... Forget about it. We're privileged, remember? Privileged enough to have no one to turn to.

[Mickey9999]

@mazing. Privilege? Don’t you think it has more to do with society’s standard that men have to be “real” men and hide their feelings and not cry, etc? I personally think that’s a completely different subject but I understand. Back to the current issue, I have to say I have some doubts on the Tinder friend... in my experience over the past couple of years, the guys I’ve gone out with have reported that the majority of the women they’ve met online utilized fake pictures or pictures from twenty years ago so I’m thinking how real are the pictures of those Tinder guys.

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 The demand for men who don't show emotions and are "tough" comes primarily from women, I would say. Most men I know can actually be much more vulnerable than it might appear amongst themselves. Whereas women sometimes react with outright disgust if as a man, you show weakness in front of them. I have had several women simply stop talking to me because I made the mistake of opening up to them. At the same time, most of the women I have met online are looking for a "masculine" man. They often explicitly want a tall, strong man with tattoos, but also a fancy career and nice suits.

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Regarding my friend's Tinder, she has actually met up with several of these men. So although people probably do fake and fudge stuff in their profiles, I also think that because the demand for sex is so much more urgent among men, men are less picky, and thus women end up "sharing" a minority of the most attractive men, while other men are left out entirely (hypergamy).

[ManOnFire]

@4mazing I will agree with that 1,000%. Women are actually the main tramplers of male vulnerability and feelings, and think any guy who shows a little softness is not a good partner for a relationship and even less so for sex.

[4mazing]

Thanks man.

[Mickey9999]

Well I suppose I’m far from a representative of the female population as are the women I associate with. I have no problem with a man being emotional or vulnerable. I welcome it and I raised my son to feel free to express himself and was probably tougher on my daughter to tighten up on her emotions. My husband was a master manipulator with his tears throughout our marriage but I didn’t recognize it until after his death in therapy. Anyone say narcissistic? My goal in life was always to leave this world a better place than I found it but I do worry that my daughter will never marry and my son will marry the first woman he falls for... but neither would take advantage of anyone deceitfully. In fact My son and boss and i were just talking about the metoo movement and the sex trade which alive and well on our reservation unfortunately... even then I warned my son I would castrate him if he ever acted as a sexual predator. All I can say there are still decent and even good women out there just as there are decent and good men... even with my marriage I haven’t lost hope in that...

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Yeah, you are right, and sorry for the negative generalizations about women. Have met great women too. So you're Native American?

[Mickey9999]

No applies necessary... just different opinions. Yes I am. Ojibwe

[Mickey9999]

Damn spellcheck. No APOLOGIES

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Thank you. Wow. I am kind of fascinated with Native American culture.

[Mickey9999]

Nice. Believe it or not we still get asked if we live in teepees. Smh.

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Wow. It's tragic that Native Americans have been decimated and marginalized to the extent they have, though. From abroad, it still seems as if that gets swept under the rug.

[Mickey9999]

Well said because it’s very true unfortunately. But we struggle at times and carryon. It seems people are either like you, or don’t know we exist other than their grade school history books which are wrong, or they think we are dirty, stupid, and drunk. I didn’t see it growing up off the Rez, people just assumed I was Latino or Asian. However moving back to the Rez for the past almost thirty years, I’ve witnessed and heard the prejudices. So I’m usually particularly careful not to generalize or be prejudice myself.

[Mickey9999]

Treat others as you want to be treated right?

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Sensible approach, and I am sorry.

[Mickey9999]

Nothing to be sorry about. Not your fault. Just ignorance and I’m above it.

[4mazing]

@Mickey9999 Okay

[Hannah_98]

Probably the latter. At least escorts are honest about it.

[DaMack999]

Agreed

[roland77]

Yes, they are very honest as they have to. Or otherwise they run into some customer's wish (e. g. not being into BDSM but the customer is) what they surely don't like.

[WhiteShoulder]

A lot of sugar babies want to be upgraded to trophy girlfriends. No one really wants to feel like they're just using someone else for their money.

[ManOnFire]

I can't upgrade that kind of girl.

[WhiteShoulder]

A lot of guys feel that way

[ManOnFire]

And we're right to feel that way.

[roland77]

@ManOnFire I don't like gold-digging humans, any sexes or genders. They are greedy at heart.

[roland77]

@WhiteShoulder Of course I feel like being gold-digged for when she is clearly after my money like one did in my past: 250 EUR gone for nothing, just because she was desperate in money. Now she is finally out of my life and I have an other girlfriend who is not after my money (she never asked for it while the first one DID). So again, of course we have a right to feel being abused for money only when does it.

[WhiteShoulder]

@roland77 you did the right thing, assuming that’s the whole story. You shouldn’t let someone use you that way.

[roland77]

Yes, almost the full story. I met her on streets and offered her my phone to make a "call" but she declined and asked for money. Next "date" was in an open (not shady, I'm not going there) back alley and she asked for more again, let me pay all. Yes, she was broke but I should have quicker come to realization that she is the gold-digger type.

[WhiteShoulder]

@roland77 you had a date in a back alley?

[roland77]

Yes, sounds strange! It was at daylight and we sit down there and talked because she was afraid of her current husband would find her. I recommended her not to cheat but at least was willing to listen to what she had to say about him, a (for her) bad fetish in color foot nails while she wants children.

[roland77]

I don't know what to make up from it, I found it wrong all from the start and honestly, I'm happy that I am no longer with her!

[WhiteShoulder]

@roland77 it sounds like you did the right thing not getting with her

[roland77]

@WhiteShoulder Yes, true. Thank you for seeing it this way. :-) Greed has poisoned our all hearts. :-/

[roland77]

So now I understand your opinion, you don't mean it pro money-taking, you mean it against.

[WhiteShoulder]

@roland77 it’s not something I would even consider doing now that I’m older and more mature.

[roland77]

@WhiteShoulder And I don't like to listen to those people who think women are after money only. I still believe in true love.

[Dongtai]

They’re literally the same thing

[arabgoddess]

Escorts are not using men for their money, they're offering services for men to purchase so it's the guys choice to how much he wana spend. So the other option is worse!

[wankiam]

an escort situation is clear from the start but gold diggers are con artists though refering to them as everyday women suggest you met a lot more than me in my life

[Taylor_C]

Most men don't have to worry about this, as they don't even have any money.

[Miristheiss]

Oh, I see all those billionaires, millionaire, 6 figure income earners are women? I did not know. I thought mostly guys invented stuff and started most companies. I was wrong.

[Taylor_C]

@Miristheiss So you're saying the average guy is a billionaire? LMAO

[tiajoka]

Lol heat comment right here

[tiajoka]

Best*

[roland77]

Still you can be bankrupted by a gold-digging person. Some people, even poor, have credit cards.

[R4vedave]

A woman who just gets involved for money.

An escort is upfront, and there's no deceit.