Is it stupid or childish that a guy stopped contacting a lady just because she told him she needed more time to get used to sex with him?

[Anonymous]

Both are in their mid 40´s and they alreayd had sex twice some months before. Let me point out they were not a couple or in a serious relationship or even dating often, they were just... friends. The guy did have sex before (before they met each other) but the lady was not experienced, in fact she lost her virginity wit this guy. The guy im sure was aware the lack of experience the lady had when they first had sex as like one year before she lost it with him, she told him about it and he told her "I dont mind". They know each other for 5 yrs!! and in some way they had the hots for each other since they first met for the way they exchange texts in those 5 years and in other dates they both had (when they did nto have sex yet).

But it seemed the guy was a bit impatient with the lady as he was more impulsive in his urges to have sex but the lady was not like that, especially when she lack of sex experience. The lady was not that bold, enthiuastic enough or impulsive as this sex stuff was new for her so it is natural she may be nervous, she had fear, she was not a pro either, while the guy im sure did have sex before so he did know what he wanted. They had sex twice but it was not like the best sex ever mostly for her in both occasion. The 1st time it was when she lost her virginity and she bled, and the guy was even surprised she did as he told her "With the ladies I was before they did not bled".

Every women is different anyway and each body reacts differently. Also the lady got jumpy and uneasy the first time as well when he wanted to fukc her. The guy did not enjoy it that much becuse being jumpy he could nto enjoy sex well. For her it was also uncomfortable as she try to do her best with him. The second time they had sex it was a bad day for her, or bad luck she got her period and she was not expecting it. So the guy did nto enjoy fuck her with her period on, but also the lady did not like it either she felt uncomfortable as well. So there was not enjoyment.

[Berethor]

The lady was acting stupid or childish when she didn't responded to the guy for 3 weeks, the lady decided to play hard to get after the guy has already fucked her 2 times, and it's stupid, and the lady keep being jumpy in PIV, even after she already had PIV with the guy 2 times, and even despite the fact that the lady is already over her 40s, and it's childish. The lady is in denial about being the guy's booty call, the lady saying that the guy who has fucked her a 2 times already is just friend, the lady didn't responded to the guy for 3 weeks so he would not think that she is easy, but the lady and the guy are not couple or in a serious relationship or even dating often, meaning that the lady was fairly easy anyway, basically the lady is the guy's booty call, but she is not good at it. Yes the guy might be very patient, but why should the guy be patient? the guy is not looking for a serious relationship, the guy only wanted casual relationship with the lady, and the lady has known that beforehand, the guy did not like drama, and the lady is making a lot of drama, by still being jumpy and by not responding to the guy for 3 weeks, their relationship is based mostly on sex, even if the lady is in denial about that, and the sex that the guy has with the lady is lacking in both quality and quantity, so why should the guy stay with the lady? especially considering that the guy is experienced, so he knows that there is a lot of mature ladies out there who would not waste his time for 3 weeks and act jumpy during sex.

Looks like the lady has missed her chance, the guy has given that lady another change after the very poor sex that the guy had with the lady last time, and told her that he want to fuck her even though his interest was becoming very low, and the lady let the guy interest to get lower over 3 weeks, until the guy has completely lost interest in the lady, instead of meeting with the guy as soon as possible. The guy has truly lost interest, the lady is just playing games and acting immature, the lady want to be intimate with the guy and yet she wasted the guy's time for a 3 weeks, and now the lady is upset that the guy has lost interest, also the lady's reply was not good enough to raise the guy interest after 3 weeks in which the guy's interest was getting lower. The lady should write the reply much sooner, and the reply should has been much more sexual or apologetic, the lady at the very least should had write that she sorry for still being jumpy and that she would try to be less jumpy next time or the lady should had write that she want the guy to fuck her a third time, and that she want to meet the guy soon.

[Berethor]

I mean "yes the guy might not be very patient, but why should the guy be patient? the guy is not looking for a serious relationship, the guy only wanted casual relationship with the lady".

[OmegaX01]

Only thing I can see here is the delayed response might have been to him a sign that she wasn't interested in him in a romantic way. 3 weeks without any communication to a guy is pretty much "I'm done with you and I don't really want to deal with you." Couple that with the not wanting to talk about it for several weeks more from the sound of it makes it hard for the guy to figure out what is going on especially if you have been friends for over 5 years.

If I don't hear from someone I'm trying to be intimate with after 3 days without knowing they are dealing with something where they can't really talk then I figure they aren't all that interested in having a relationship and I pack up and move on.

[Asker]

He eas never looking for a romantic relationship with her in the first place anyway. He just wanted the fun with her

[Asker]

Like i said she did respond sure but 3cweeks later she did not wanted to sound desesperate when they were not even a couple anyway and also he treated her like he had to be his beck and call in other previoys time like she was some toy. Or an easy lady even if she is in her. mid 40 but like i said everything related to sex wss still new to her the reason she told him that and she thought she had to get used to ve with him. so each time she coukd enjoy it more what is wro g about that?

[OmegaX01]

The whole point is never just stop communicating with someone for almost a month and expect them to be in the same place mentally they were when you stopped talking to them. If their situations were reversed the guy would be the one who made things worse by not talking to her sooner. But the fact of the matter in this case is the woman made the mistake of cutting off communication and now is trying to make the guy out to be the one being callus of her feelings.

[Asker]

The guy i firgot to post ghosted her before for like 5 months at that time she did not spoke to him and then all of a sudden he triwd to reach hwr like nothing happened so she thought she did the same and 3 weeks were nothing in comparing to his ghostong first before

[Asker]

They were never a couple or had a relationship

[Asker]

I beleive the guy simply got upset with her not for the period of time she took her to respond 3 weeks but he stopped contacting her for the only reason he could not got away with it that he wanted to fuck her On His time when he wanted and the way He wanted plus the fact the lady was jumpy even if they had sex before. But he assume the lady may had improved her sex after only 2 times with him. So he did not want the lady told him that she had to get used to it to enjoy it more. Being with him. Because everything was new to her the reason she was jumpy. I beleive that is the reason he ghosted her again

[Asker]

That she acted like a girl instead of a woman i mean the lady did not have much experience she had to keep learning and for that she had to get use to it to enjoy it each time like she told him.

[Berethor]

Looks like doing the same was a very bad move on the lady's part, men and women are different, the guy is dominant and don't like rebellious ladies, plus his interest was already low.

[Anonymous]

Hey, both of you are in your 40s. How can you not be comfortable having sex?

[Asker]

Read further. The lady was a virgin until she had sex with him in her mid 40´s- Evertyhign was new to her at her age, cause she lack of men experience she never had sex when she was younger so it is natural everything was new to her.

[Asker]

The guy as a guy he is was not a virgin im sure so for him it was like a day in the park but not for her. Men adn women react differently to all of this and also the lady was not that bold or impulsive

[Opinion Owner]

That's kind of sad.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, I think delaying your reply to him was a mistake, but also he realized there wasn't going to be easy sex, so he lost interest.

[Asker]

Yes she eas no whore for him. to have easy sex but she was new to all. of that the reason she told him that and also she had to get used to it to enjoy it each time. What was wrong about that?

[Opinion Owner]

Nothing really, but he might have had an expectation of easy sex.

[Berethor]

Yes the guy expect easy sex, that why the guy don't want to be in a serious relationship.

[AustinMan]

Do you want sympathy, which is okay, or the real truth from another ol' horn dog?

[cheapshotbob]

yeah it was stupid of him, if he would have tried a littler harder maybe more could have came of it but him no contacting the girl means he is ready to move on and she needs to find a guy who will understand you better that guy sounds like he was not really into someone he could not relate to.

[Asker]

Even if they were not in a relationship or or a couple eitehr they were just friends?

[cheapshotbob]

if they were friends and he just stopped talking to her all together yeah that is dumb of him because there was more there before the relationship he needs to remember that

[Asker]

Indeed before all the sex stuff we alreayd knew each other for 5 years. We even went out on normal 2 dates without sex, wwe both enjoy the dates but he always wanted to have sex with me since the beginning I just stall him for quite sometime as I was new to all of this, I was nervous and not really ready for that step yet, even if it was a bit boredome to him to wait that long for me to decide to have sex with him especially if we alreayd jknew each otehr and we were not practically strangers.

[seansin]

No I don't think so if she's being honest and everything maybe he's too big maybe she needs to make herself be no more towards him I don't know what the situation is all the way there's always different opinions about it but no somebody asked for time no big deal that gives you more time to hang out and get to know each other out in public to cool things like concerts and dinners and movies

[slatyb]

Sorry, the 40+ year-old virgin is the immature one. He decided that they were not compatible and ended it. That’s the way it goes. She’s not his child. He doesn’t owe her infinite patience. Presumably he moved on to date an adult.

[Asker]

The virgin was the lady but the she did lost it with him after the first time there was a, second time with the description i mention3dcabove. So why is the ladys fault? She 2as new to all of that she was not a expert and you even can have the perfect s3x in hust 2 time. Some ppeople even takes like 5 times to get it right. Thwre was going to be a 3rd time but the guy assume she already had some more expertise in the 3rd time

[slatyb]

Ino fault is needed to end a relationship. He moved on. Time for her to do the same.

[Berethor]

Their relationship was lacking in both quality and quantity, that's why he moved on.

[COMMODOREII]

It could be immature but then the experience for both sides were not good.

[Sabretooth]

take it as a hint.