Instantly, once upon a time, I would have said sex. I would not have even been able to tell you what sexual compatibility was. I enjoyed sex and in a sense I need sex.
Not need in the sense of food or water. Rather, sex gives a man a sense of physical relief and masculine dominance and affirmation of our manhood. None too surprising that. After all, it was evolution made us to do - propagate the species, make babies and all that.
So I would not want to be without sex, for sure. However, when I met my girlfriend - now of 14 years and three children together - and I found a real sexual compatibility. There is nothing like it. All my animal instincts are satisfied - but there is also an intense sense of connection, of being wanted and loved.
It is really hard to describe. My girlfriend and I tend to a very primal sex. Not always, but more often than not. We are like two animals breeding in a field and you would not exactly say that sounds romantic.
That, though, is the odd part. When we have sex, it is all that we are. We are reduced to our most base and carnal selves. Nothing but instinct and no pretenses. Yet it becomes total sharing. We are naked right down to the emotional level and it is like the whole universe shrinks down to just the two of us and nothing else matters and the most base animal sex becomes pure love.
Yup, I know it sounds sappy. If you had described it to me 15 years ago I would probably have rolled my eyes. In fairness, it is probably hard to say how much this is just my love for my girlfriend - and I love her and the three little gifts that she has given me more than life itself.
Still, when my girlfriend and I started having sex there was just something so natural and even beautiful. As I say, total giving and total sharing. I could have just sex - but now I have a real appreciation for what sexual compatibility means and that is more than I ever would have guessed all the way back when I lost my virginity way back when at age 16.
Not sappy at all! Very well said! And if anyone has had that real connection, they will get what you mean. Anyone who don't get it, means they've never really experienced it! Thanks so much for the great answer ❣️
Thanks so much for your kind remarks. Yup, I will never get how I got so lucky to find a woman who loves me so much and with whom I am so sexually compatible. Not even sure where one ends and the other begins. However, it is intense. It makes me feel like a man and at the same time more emotionally vulnerable as I could ever be. It's amazing and I am a very lucky and happy man. Thanks again.
Yes you are. Sexual compatibility and love don't always come hand in hand. I've loved someone but want always sexual compatible. And I was very sexually compatible. But we were only compatible sexually, in all other ways not compatible at all. Just wish could find/have both. Lucky you 🙂
HUGE depends attached to this one!
Looking for long term:
Me - I like to go down on girls to make sure they are satisfied.
Hot Girl - I don't really like sex a whole lot.
Me - Oh..., (reaches in pocket and grabs phone). Sorry, this is a work call and I need to take it.
Horny:
Me - I'm just looking for a little fun tonight. You?
Hot girl - I can make your every desire come true...(whispers in my ear) but I also have a penis under this skirt ;)
Me - 😳😳😳😳. . . . . . give me a second to pay the bar tab.
😂😂 Lmao
that's a B for me! and i'm usually a-type - bahahahah! but no way - i don't want sex i want awesome-blow-your-mind-right-out-the-door-to-the-next-planet kind of sex and hey? did we just find a new planet? oh right on? cuz we're not even kissing yet so what is that gonna feel like? and now my lips are on fire and i can't. even. think. and. who. cares. what. my. name. is cuz at that point your knees are weak and if he can do that to me from afar? oh man do i want to kiss that guy! so a big HELL YA to the sexual compatibility!
thank you sooo much for most Helpful Girls and i don't have to re-explain the million reasons why? like even i can't take all of my mushiness sometimes! but that doesn't mean i don't feel it! so thank you! you know how much i appreciate it!
Compatibility is far more important than just the act of having sex!
Couldn't agree more. I'd rather no sex than sex with someone I'm not compatible with. That'd host leave you more frustrated in my opinion
Well just imagine being married to a man you're not sexually comparable with and being stuck in that marriage
I was lol with my first husband. But that's not why got divorced. More cuz he was very physically abusive.
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Based in my personal experience with my (now ex) girlfriend of more than a decade, sex (or lovemaking to be precise) is an art that both can learn and "perfect" together as a couple.
Hence what is needed is neither sex nor compatibility but the desire to live a sex-filled lifestyle.
Having such a desire will motivate both to plan our lives to make regular sex possible.
It will also make us more adventurous and dare to try new things.
Finally, through time, after fantasies are tried and played, we know each other better and sex becomes more satisfying (hence compatible).
So it begins with one: the desire to live a sex-filled lifestyle. The rest will be sensual memories.
Compatibility makes all kinds of relationships more colorful, pleasant and enjoyable. Not only sex.
Nor did I say that
But this isn't a relationship question it's a sex question, why it's under sexuality and not relationship topic
I got it. When I said Not only sex, I meant compatibility in sex is more important (as in relationships). I may not have been able to explain/express.
Compatibility, and her, as a person, and how we relate, no question at all!!
Sex is just a small part of a really good, solid relationship, and connecting, understanding, and being compatible is so much more important!
Sex preferences can develop, change, and over time with someone that you have a really good relationship, and love, sex just finds it's way, between you, in your own way!
Once again, great answer 🙂
To paraphrase a cliche "Sex is temporary, Compatibility is permanent" and I wouldn't widen the scope and just say "Compatibility" rather than "Sexual Compatibility" alone
Great answer ❣️ I agree. Sexual compatibility without being compatible in any other way won't work in Long run
If we don't like the same things in bed, it isn't going to work
I agree. Sex can't be the only or most important thing, but it is a big part in keeping a happy, healthy relationship or sex life
To me it matters on the person. If I got to know them and let's say we married because i loved them with all of my heart but the sex was terrible. Sex or being sexually compatible would not matter as much to me but relationship compatible vs sexually compatible I'd choose relationship
Sexual compatibility
Oh so totally agree
Compatibility. I can do the sex part myself if I have to.
You can have sex with someone and still be frustrated
Exactly. And then what's the point. Rather just do myself at that point, like you said lol
Sometimes doing yourself two or three times in a row is the best way to deal with a certain kind of frustration.
Sexual compatibility, absolutely. But that being said, I wouldn't wait forever, or do something like wait until marriage. Sex needs to happen at some point
Who said wait till marriage? But I wouldn't keep having sex with someone if not compatible just for the sake of having sex.
I'm just describing the limits of my answer. And yeah, I agree. Even if I'm just looking for a casual, sexual relationship, compatibility is still important
Yeah, if not enjoying the sex, what would be the point? 🤷🏼♀️
Well, personal compatibility is, and if that's there, even if the sex is not so great (which has never been my experience), I'm still sticking around.
How are you defining sexual compatibility here?
Wanting, enjoying the same things. Bring able to express, explore your needs/desires together. Sex is good for both, both getting the same sexual satisfaction, not just one or the other.
Well that’s not a binary thing. If I’m seeking a new relationship I’d seek a pretty high level of compatibility - high overlap in what our wants and needs are both in type and quantity and a similar enthusiasm to meeting others non overlapping needs. But in a long term relationship if there’s a significant overlap even if incomplete I’d enjoy that as best I can. Anyway I’m in a marriage with a zero in both right now so 🤷🏼♂️
Sorry to hear that ❣️
More excitement and intense orgasms. Compatibility; always.
Exactly
B for me Toots. If not compatible, could just get a blow up sex doll lol... might look a little funny together out at dinner or movies... but be about same sex wise if not compatible lol...
P. S. for the record... I have never had a blowup sex doll or an encounter with one lol :)
There's always the maid 🙃🙂😂
Yes but even with maids there needs to be some level of compatibility... for starters, a willingness for her to enter the room during such times lol... Have a great day TCVS :)
😂 Yeah talking bout maids with you is bad for my rep😂
Compatibility is more important to me.
I've gotta like what she does and she's gotta like what I do and have a similar likes and dislikes and mindset when it comes to sex. When you have that kind of sexual comparability and chemistry it elevates the whole experience and that goes for the relationship as a whole regarding comparability and chemistry not just the sex part.
Agree
I think both in a way
Sexual compatibility. Compatibility is the difference between meh sex and really good sex
Exactly. Isn't that what I said 🤔😂
Lol I missed that but yea it's the same thing you said. 🤦♂️
I'm just messing with you 🙃🙂
Okay, look:. Yes, sexual compatibility is important.
BUT it's not as big of a deal as you think it is. What's more important is RELATIONAL compatibility. You have to be able to GET ALONG. As long as you have a good relationship with the other person and the two of you are able to work well together, and as long as you respect each other and consider each other's needs, then whatever happens in the bedroom WILL work out. Because with the right attitude you can make it work.
(Having said that, though, there are some obvious things that need to be discussed ahead of time, such as frequency of sex, anal or no anal, and whether or not you want to have kids.)
I'd prefer sexual compatibility, although to some extent it can be learnt; "The body without spirit is dead."
Great answer ❣️
Man and woman are sexually compatible. Adapting to each other sexually and non sexually is imperative for all couples who love each other and want their relationship to survive.
Compatibility. If the shoe fits I will wear it, and fall in love with it at the same time.
Cute analogy lol well said!
Shhhpanks!
😂😂 lol funny 🙃🙂
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