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Is it okay for a 16 year old to have sexual relations with a 35 year old (The age of consent in our state is 16)?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Legally, depends where you are.

    Morally depends on the individuals, their relationship, power dynamic between them, whether the younger party feels they have to hide it, etc. When I was 16 year olds there are definitely 35 year old women I would have liked to have slept with, On the other hand it's even more likely than it would be with same age peers for the younger party to feel explicitly or implicitly pressured. As sort of came up in one of the comments, a less experienced 16 year old trying to be mature for a 35 year old is a bad idea, but a 16 year old who is already having casual sex, it comes down to whether its a respectful partner or not.

    While at 16 I would have slept with a bunch of 35 year olds, as an over 35, I have never met a 16 year old i'd be comfortable sleeping with. So I guess there's that.

  • Sounds like legally ok, I wasn't aware of that. I just think it is a terrible idea... the maturity difference is so great. Your brain isn't done growing yet.

    Some cultures, it is more than that... I think that's awful. I can tell you that what I thought at 16 and what I thought at 35... it's a huge difference.

    There are risks in these situations for women especially that are life altering. I would report this back to parents and or trusted colleagues. Everyone should have a support network they can trust. You are almost fully in control of your own life... within a few years. You can and should make little mistakes, but big ones... try not to. I would not...

Most Helpful Girls

  • Possibly (maybe not) legally OK, but it's unwise to start having sex at 16 regardless of the partner's age. If you're going to take the plunge anyway, both you and your prospective older partner need to dig a little deeper into the law. Many state laws are tricky and are often misinterpreted; for instance, while the age of consent may be under 18, some state laws allow for it only when the partner is within a certain age range. For example, in one state a 16 year old may freely and lawfully consent to sex with someone up to and including age 24, but with a 25 year old it subjects him (or her) to statutory rape charges. Read the laws themselves, don't count on public opinion, words from a friend or friend of a friend.

    • yes pretty much this, they're called Romeo and Juliet laws at least when I was growing up, just cause it says 16 there can be circumstances, the one you posted is a good example, that's how it is where I'm at

    • @blutwolfe Yes, you are correct. My own state has close in age exemptions, but age gap can mean the difference between being within the law and a statutory rape charge. When it comes to sex involving 16 year olds, it's all fine and good until a parent complains to the police. Then it becomes a mess. I've defended both men and women caught up in this; sadly, the first time they'd actually read what the law says is when I show it to them - when they're in custody. There's way too much reliance on gossip, schoolyard lawyers, etc. when it comes to this topic (same with stand your ground and self-defense law, among others). In this day and age, ignorance of the law is insupportable - every state has its statutes available online, and one doesn't have to be a lawyer to read and understand them, one only needs to be literate. This, like many others, is a case where one really needs to look before one leaps, for it may not be legal under a particular set of circumstances.

  • Consent laws usually are written that both parties are under 18 or in some states they would allow like a 2 year window so if the person was 16 they could be with an 18 year or something like that It's usually both people are under aged. A 35 year old should NOT have sexual relationships with a 16 year old.

    • Here's the different state laws on it.
      https://www.dunhamlaw.com/age-consent-texas/ Go down a ways to see all the laws. The 35 year old could potentially be charged with rape in some states especially if the person's parents got involved. That would put the older person on the sex offenders list.

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What Girls & Guys Said

19 45

  • No, nah uh, nope

  • It may raise a few eyebrows but what else can they do

    • Thank you ! Finally a real person and not a pilgrim-bot.

    • It will definitely raise something and some times that's a good thing and sometimes that's a fantastic thing, right?

  • Okay in the sense of legal, but not wise.

  • Morally I dont think it's ok. There's just too much of an age gap. At 24 I find going on dates with 19 year old aggravating and borderline I couldnt imagine 16

    • its not a relationship by the way it's more of a hookup, do you think in our case it's different

    • No I think it's even worse then. It's just too young for that man. he's a predator even if you dont see it

  • Don't care what the age of consent is, that's fucked up. 0

  • ngl its kinda weird. but if you're comfortable with it and you know what you're doing , who am i to stop you doing whatever you're doing with him.

  • If it doesn't break any laws, then the worst people can do is disagree. Guess it all depends on how much that means to the "couple."

  • I mean it’s technically “okay” I guess, but I still don’t think it’s right in my opinion.

    Tbh, I’d be questioning a 35 year old being with a 20 year old - let alone someone who’s 16. It just seems a bit creepy and predatory to me.

  • Age of consent doesn't mean much. It just means that in a court of law (if reported) you would be accused of statuary rape instead of pedophilia. Despite the sex being consensual it's still considered illegal. That is if it is reported usually cases like these are reported by parents of the girl/boy as they can legally pursue you of statuary rape even if the daughter says it was consensual. I'd say it's best not to do it as you never know how it could play out.

  • No it is not

  • Technically legal by the vial ass law but so very, very wrong.

  • Legally, sure it's fine.

    But morally? Extremely creepy, and it's a huge red flag that the guy involved is a massive creep. There's such a drastic difference in development and maturity, that completely imbalances the dynamic.

  • It’s legal but I’m not in favor. How did this even start? I’m really opposed if the 35-year-old hit on the 16-year-old. A middle-aged guy with a high school student? Eww.

  • If he is old enough to be your father then no lmao

  • Yes it's legal but sounds morally wrong. I know men are attracted to some young girls that's totally fine. What could they possibly have in common as both are in different stages in life

  • If it is legally ok in your state, then there is no problem. Make sure your parents are happy with it, but be prepared to get a few comments!

  • Troll

  • I think it is a bad idea for the most part because they are on different stages of life. At 30, I would not have sex with any girl who wasn't out of high school and living away from her parents.

  • Legally, in your dumbass state, yes. However, morally, I think it’s disgusting. They’d be labeled as a pedophile in every other state. At that age, their dad could be that old 🤦🏽‍♀️

  • If it's legal, it's ok. Although I find it a bit strange...

  • Show More (44)

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