Why is it always when he’s in the mood but never when I am?

[Anonymous]

My problem is really simple. Why do we only have sex when he wants to but never when I want to. I haven’t really enjoyed it the last few times and I think it’s because I’m just not in the mood. This is why I try to initiate it when I am in the mood but just end up rejected. Now I just don’t want toga e sex at all after being rejected every time and rather just take care of it myself.

what can I actually do? If he doesn’t want to then he shouldn’t have to but I’m just getting kind of hit in the confidence a bit every time..

[baconninjadc]

Men are always in the mood or almost always. unlike women we don't need our engines warmed up we can go zero to a hundred in a split second. As far as being rejected I've seen competition in the form of masturbation and porn. Make sure those two things are not in your relationship for either of you. I disagree that if he doesn't want to he shouldn't have to. He is your sexual partner and you have needs that he must fulfill. It's in the job description and every guy knows it just as every woman knows it. I don't think this has anything to do with your confidence I'm sure you get plenty of validation from other men who look at you & smile. I believe you can direct your attention squarely at the man next to you in bed who should be putting his penis in you on a regular basis. Finally you said it yourself your problem is really simple. you go into a relationship in order to be able to indulge in the same way that you go into a restaurant in order to be able to eat. imagine going to a restaurant and not being able to eat that would be incredibly frustrating and you would simply go to another restaurant. If he can't get the job done you will go to another man I believe

[AustinMan]

Is this helpful?

How to Talk to Your SO About Sex ↗

Talk to him!

[Ms_Facesitter]

Say no when you're not in the mood. Not just to give him a taste of his own medicine, but also because it's just logical that if you're not in the mood, you don't have to do it, especially if he doesn't do the same for you.

[OlderAndWiser]

The reason this happens is that you say "yes" when your answer should be "no" but he says "no" when his answer is "no."

[Secret6620]

Sounds kinda selfish to me. 💜

[bigmatt98]

Ouch... that's a lack of mutual respect companion amd just giving a shitism personally my drive si high is never reject the person I'm with unless I was dead tired amd then I'd make it up to her in the monring

[MannMitAntworten]

Beats me. I am ALWAYS in the mood.

[Stan_Control_]

Make him a deal. Tell him that if he doesn't help you out when you're in the mood, you don't help him out.

[navyP]

Sounds like you need to have a discussion with him and let him know how you feel
He might not even be aware that he is doing that

[alance99]

Just tell him clearly if he doesn't take care of his needs then you won't give what he needs

[OddBeMe]

I did have to learn what turns my wife on and more importantly what turns her off. But people don’t like to learn.

[Lunatic1]

That is wrong, a good relationship is all about balance. He should take care of your needs too.

[minathesam]

I guess you should talk about it with him, maybe he doesn't realize that he does that.. talking about things is way more important than the things itself

[Anonymous]

Oh child-just have sex when you want to. If you don't give in when he wants it then he will always want it when you do. Trust me, sexual availability is how women exert control over men.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like he’s selfish and you’re not.