Girls, why didn't you want to have sex when he indicated he was ready?

Question

Most people don't have sex on a first or second date but, eventually, most people either break up or their relationship gets closer and they have sex. Most people believe that guys want to start having sex sooner than their partner feels ready.

I think many girls have the idea that if the guy wants to have sex sooner than she wants it, then the guy must "only" be interested in sex. For me, physical intimacy is a way to make the relationship closer, it's a great way to express affections, and of course it feels good. Most women feel the same but they still aren't ready as quickly as guys. So, ladies, what holds you back? In the last sexual relationship in which you held back, WHY did you hold back or hesitate to have sex with your partner?

musicbrain5 · Accepted Answer

I’ve only had one partner. I chose option G because I was shy at first, but really it was because I was a virgin. I was 21 and unsure of myself and what I was ready for. He respected that and didn’t push it.

wittymilf · Accepted Answer

I was with my husband 9 months before we started having sex. I wasn’t willing to have sex with a dude until I knew he was in love with me.

Caramel_creme · Answer

I didn’t choose any of the options.

When I was a teenager and a virgin, I think societal expectations caused me to push off having sex to a good extent, however in the last couple of decades, I just can’t bring myself to have sex with a stranger.

Sex is one of the most intimate things you could do with a person. Can’t think of much that can top it. You are being alone with this person, naked and vulnerable. You are also exchanging bodily fluids and having direct skin to skin contact all over...

I can’t bring myself to do that with someone I don’t know and trust at least relatively well.

laurieluvsit · Answer

VOTE H : I didn't hold back! I'm ready when you are! ... lol

princesssnowflake · Answer

I come from a relatively conservative family. My mom and all my aunts stayed virgins until marriage. My sisters are still virgins. Most of the time what holds me back is the way I was raised. I chose the situation isn’t right, because that’s all that I think when I’m deciding whether or not to do it. Maybe it’s wrong but I just know in my core that it’s not something I should be doing. Maybe when I get to college that’ll change, but I think that won’t be the case. I guess it also has to do with that I’ve never dated a guy that I felt deserved to be my first. I guess simply put, the situation hasn’t been ideal.

devilish-cutie · Answer

Beacuse it takes time to get comfortable for it to feel right. You should get to know the person before you are intimate with him, not just go with your urges. Its stupid to me to be so intimate with someone you just met, you dont know thwt person at all. Its like asking if you vibe with someone as a friend why aren't you telling them openly qll your secrets right away. That would be stupid. It takes time to trust someone. Its not that we dont have sexual urges as men, its just that we are being smart about it, we dont let those urges rule us. For women there is also always fear of pregnancy. If im gonna have sex with a guy I wanna make sure im gonna be ok having a kid with that man if it accidentally happens. And thsts always a risk with sex.
I voted E. Yeah its mostly issue of bot knowing him well, trusting him and feeling safe with him.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Guilt from religious beliefs as well as wanting to wait so many months til i feel comfortable. Plus i need to be in love

VIVANT · Answer

Virgin. Not ready. Not for any of the reasons you mentioned, just wasn’t ready. Like it didn’t feel ready. Not any particular reason and maybe many reasons.

However, if I was ready and yet not ready, it’d be bc I don’t feel close enough to the guy. Not necessarily that I’ll be used , but it could be that too. Bit trust isn’t just about being used. It’s for me more About literally trusting him to be decent during sex. I worry a lot about things getting out of control. So I have to really trust he respects me. Also for me feeling very close to someone is simply important part of sex.

Daniela1982 · Answer

Seriously, you condone having sex within the 3 date rule? Does anyone ever wonder how STD's get passed around when no one uses protection and they don't even ask if the person they are dating has HIV or some other little tidbit that they are contributing to the cause? Guys complain that it DOESN"T feel good when they have to use a condom so one shouldn't be surprised that they don't use one or even offer to use one if she prefers. No wonder dating has gone to the dump. It is not really dating, but more like a prolonged Hook Up. I remember dating was for getting to know someone and you usually dated for a month or more before sex was even considered. Now it is "Let's get to the screwing" part ASAP. and you may not even know what their name is.

AzureGirl · Answer

Out of those options i would say the last one but I also wanted to wait a while into our relationship before taking that step.

Can_I_Get_a_Do-Over · Answer

“To touch a woman, you must first touch her heart. To touch a man’s heart, you must first touch him.“ It didn’t work.

When I started dating again after a long time not, I did not hold back. I was ready when he was. Then as I saw a pattern of 3x then ghosted, I stopped because women are slut-shamed and I didn’t want a long line of men whose names I wouldn’t remember in a a year. That’s the difficult part for me. I think it’s sad to lose touch with someone you’ve been intimate with but men don’t seem to care. People are not disposable. I’m a real person with real feelings and if we have sex, I think he must like me because I like him. I was wrong.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

E or A or a combination of both.

Girls, why didn't you want to have sex when he indicated he was ready?

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