Which is more common - Guys pretend they want a relationship to get sex, or Girls play hard to get to prove the guy's interest is more than just sex?

Question

Which do you think is the more common situation - guys who pretend they want a relationship in order just to get sex, or girls who play hard to get in order to get the guy to prove that his interest in her is more than just sexual, and in the process lose a guy who was genuinely interested in a relationship? Hopefully this doesn't turn into a bloodbath.

0112358 · Accepted Answer

I haven’t seen either that often. I think they happen more in conservative places maybe? Generally if you’re in a place where hookups happen, males who want to hookup should NEVER pretend to want a relationship - it backfires. Girls who might have hooked up instead assume he’d judge them and act like they don’t have casual sex. The players I’ve known were constantly saying “I don’t want to control anyone/ be tied down/ to busy for a relationship/ just looking for cool girls to hang out with” and other things to normalize hooking up.

I’m sure it happens but I haven’t seen it in person. As for girls holding off and losing guys? I don’t know? Any guy I’ve known in such a scenario interpreted her behaviour as “no chemistry” as opposed to her waiting.

Lliam · Accepted Answer

I have no idea which is more common.
The only thing I have to say to this question is, when I pursued women, it was always with the intention of having a relationship. I never fooled a woman in order to sleep with her, only to kick her the curb like trash as soon as I got what I wanted. I'm beyond disgusted by that kind of sociopathic behavior.
That being said, in my earlier years, up to my mid-30s, I never intended for relationships to last forever. I wasn't looking to settle down, get married and start a family. If a woman I was in a relationship with started acting like that's what she wanted, I eventually let her down as gently as possible and moved on.

el_Te_de_la_Rosa · Accepted Answer

Well, I've never dated a girl, so I can't compare. Weighing on guys who interacted with me, 90% only wanted sex.

Most of them are already in a relationship. They talked about their partners all the time, and still asking if I'm okay to be their side pieces. They didn't even want to be a friend because when I said no, no more talks. Things they spoke to me was all about my appearance. I feel uncomfortable to have these men around. I wish they'd be more respectful to their wives and girlfriends.

Anyways, I voted C.

douride2 · Accepted Answer

I think it's more likely guy feining interest to get sex.

Obtuse · Answer

I don't really find either of those so common over here. Might depend on the culture. My thinking is that cultures which value abstinence before sex but simultaneously have another prevailing viewpoint that doesn't value it at all will have the most cases of both since a system like that is most likely to reward the most deceptive guys who lack the ethical constraints and can say whatever they want to get a girl into the bedroom, while many girls might be persuaded to be reluctant to avoid being exploited by those types or considered easy by the others.

molonski2 · Answer

Id say the guys answer , I've seen it too many times.

SilverRose10 · Answer

No idea I just think its ironic that gerally people are harsher on the opposite gender

Apple1996 · Answer

I think it's the girls playing hard to get

ecfresh · Answer

Guys are motivated to use women as objects vs women feeling insecure? That’s a close one so I don’t see an obvious reason to pick one side or another.

Deathly_Pheonix · Answer

With people I personally know, I always see guys getting into a relationship just for sex. I almost never see girls playing hard to get anyways

mk200195 · Answer

The sexual urge is a selfish urge. There's a part of the brain that is determined to see that you reproduce and continue the human species. Current evidence indicates that men are more driven to have sex with somebody, maybe anybody, while women are more careful, more selective about partners. Men who are immature, selfish, self-centered, or disrespectful of women will use lies and dishonest behavior to get a woman in bed, after which they will have no use for her. Which is why that tired old advice your mother gave you was so spot-on. Get to know the guy before you jump in the sack with him. Give him a chance to show that he is either thoughtful or thoughtless about you.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I think it's more common girls play hard to get in order to get the guy to prove that his interest in her is more than just sexual, and in the process lose a guy who was genuinely interested in a relationship.

ColHathi · Answer

That's why people play hard to get?

winterfox10 · Answer

I think B is the most common. A lot of women assume that guys have like a whole plan in place when it comes to women, but we just don't. Many guys, maybe even most, have no clue where things will go. As much as it sucks, sometimes you sleep with a girl and the chemistry just isn't there. I don't think that should count as a guy just wanting to have sex. Saying that the guy just wants to sleep with you is kinda missing the underlying spirit of what's going on.

syncheart · Answer

Guys pretend they want a relationship to get sex.

ZeussLightningBolt · Answer

The first one

smilelots · Answer

not sure you would have to ask the woman and the men and hope that there being honest.

loveslongnails · Answer

I only agree slightly with this part... " and in the process lose a guy who was genuinely interested in a relationship." If a guy is TRULY interested in you, and he has any sense, he'll realize what you're doing and call you on it. If he calls you on it way too soon, then you're still in game mode. But if he's been around for a LONG time and treated you right, and THEN he calls you on it, you have to figure he's stuck around because he really wants all of you.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

There is absolutely no reason to play "hard to get" (or play anything, for that matter) if you're looking for a relationship with a guy. It is counterproductive and it will always blow up in your face; it will never end well.

The only reason you should ever play "hard to get" is if a guy wants to have sex with you, and you want to have sex with him, too, but you don't want him to think you're "easy."

OfDeath · Answer

Tie.

clampfan101 · Answer

Of course the polls are mostly looking like pointing fingers. lol I voted C.

Siavash_1990 · Answer

It is a tie

crazygus77 · Answer

Girls playing hard to get

Leenywalksdown · Answer

Its almost equal tbh

Which is more common - Guys pretend they want a relationship to get sex, or Girls play hard to get to prove the guy's interest is more than just sex?

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