When is the right age/time to have the 'sex talk' with your kids?

[DanaeAdam5]

[Laura_Marx]

I think the lesson of sex education is that talking about sex with children, of itself, does not traumatize them, nor does it lead them into moral depravity. You can talk freely about sex with a child at any age. You do not need to construct some kind of initiatory system where they first learn about storks which bring babies & then eventually learn about reproduction & then eventually learn about erections... I wish someone told me about erections before I got one! I was terrified! Better to let them know whats in their future & let them grapple with it. However, I don't know that you'll need to sit down and have 'the talk' with them per se; kids are curious and will ask questions... Sex will come up as a subject of curiosity naturally.

One difficulty here is coming up with an explanation that will satisfy a child without losing their interest by being too long or complicated. I remember my young cousin, when we were playing guitar, asked me how the amplifier makes sounds when you play the electric guitar - a great question. I began by answering like I would with an adult: 'When you pluck a string, it begins to vibrate. On the guitar there are magnetic 'pickups' which...' And at this point I realized I lost him. He wasn't listening. 'The strings vibrate', that's what he got out of it. So I left him with an unsatisfying, incomplete explanation. I should have said 'These things' (pointing to the pickups) 'send a signal to the amplifier'. Then he might have asked more quesitons: 'what kind of signal?' etc. It might be good to be mindful of this when a child asks a question that relates to sex. If they say 'where do babies come from?' and you say 'Well, when you're older, your body will begin going through changes...' they'll probably just lose the thread.

[Apple1996]

I'm not sure having the talk is really that important anymore considering so many children have internet access. Like my parents gave me a small talk but nothing to intense. I was maybe around 7 so I'll probably do the same for my kids

[Red_Arrow]

Look at some of the stupid questions on here. Internet access does not ensure good sex Ed. In fact, a lot if terrible bullshit is online. Best to answer questions as they arise and not get more technical than what they are really asking.

[I-am-a-nobody]

I'll say 8, but you don't just spring the whole penis in vagina thing on them all at once. You talk about babies being in the mommy's belly and I liked to talk science... like Fallopian tubes, etc. and baby development in the uterus at 6 years old even.
Wwe emphasized no sex until marriage and so far so good at 15 and 18.

[Jjpayne]

Once when they ask where babies come from then once when we talk about same sex mommys and daddy's. Then once at the start of close to the start at the sex talk or puberty. Which ever comes first. But specifically with these two books

[Shy_701116]

I would say once there mature, because if they are not then they might start talking about it in school and then a teacher might find out and then your kid might get in trouble. Also I dont really think you need to have that talk because they'll find out eventually ( when their ready) you wouldn't want to tell them and scar them for life

[Quackthulu]

My perspective is that if they are mature enough to ask questions than they are mature enough to hear the proper answer. Withholding information from children only leads to confusion, poor communication, and lack of trust later in their life.

[Red_Arrow]

Tell them what they want to know when they ask. And only answer to their level. Don’t get technical beyond what they are actually asking.

[nopedydoo]

around 10 if not earlier.
we learned about it at school in 5th grade and thats really all i had. my parents have never given me the talk so i kind of was forced to learn everything on my own and from other kids. plus a lot of kids already knew bits and pieces before the sex ed lesson in 5th grade so i was wildly confused whenever they made jokes or whatnot. i know some parents who tell their kids at a young age, like 6ish (which i think ill do) bc then it normalizes everything and doesn't make it seem like such a big deal and theyll be able to ask you questions and be more comfortable talking to you about it. dont wait till 13 like some people here are saying just bc girls can get periods before then and boys will probably start "exploring" their bodies before that age too and itll be better to explain everything beforehand and itll also me less awkward for them the younger they are

[Smashingdoozy]

Im planning on being honest with my kids as they are growing up. Depending on their age... Eg a 3 year old asking where babies come I would explain it in a way that isn't graphic and that they would understand. But an 8 year old is old enough in my eyes to know what sex is so it would be explained more appropriately to that age

[Glenn603]

I would say about 12 or 13. I never had the conversation with my mum and dad but i just found out everything for myself

[esssmeralda]

i never got the sex talk, learned from friends and tv etc

[Lemia]

Between 15 and 17 unless they hit puberty early

[DannyFanny]

I would say 12, that's when I feel kids start to get curious.

[Agape93]

As early as possible

[Dargil]

At puberty.

[0112358]

I don’t think one big talk is a great idea.

you answer questions and provide information as they ask and as it comes up.

before puberty you need to go over some of it again because it’s likely they’ve half forgotten because they didn’t care.

you just try to maintain open dialogue.

[oldguystillhasit]

I had two talks, one just before puberty along with a sex ed class telling us the basic "mechanics". The second talk was when I started wanting to be with girls. This talk was responsibility of my actions when having sex and the possible consequences.

[KingdomForAKiss]

When they start asking questions, it's good to be open and honest. It's better to explain scientifically than have them hear things first from older kids.

[Kunxter]

So this really happens? I don't know, I have never had this kind of talk, and no problems so far. I thought this only happens in American movies. Do American children really need an explanation of how these things work? I haven't heard people talking about this talk in my country. I think we don't even have sex education at our schools. I thought children just find out somehow. Friends, classmates, movies, this was my "sex talk". I thought this was the case with everybody.

[Robertcw]

Puberty. It's the time our biology sets for ourselves.

Waiting longer, in my opinion, is cruel and creates anxiety.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I believe age 12/13 cause that is when puberty starts
and girls start having periods etc.

[pigoat]

Early teens seems default

[Alexandrubaschet08]

i thing is ok all the time, but you need to cesor some adults words. My parents start to talk about male female interaction when i whas age 12

[leonidas69]

"Right" and "wrong" here is subjective. I think before the teenager is sexually active but after puberty has definitely started to go full swing. So maybe 14-15 years old.