Is putting parental blocks on your internet going too far?

[Anonymous]

so a little background, I've grown up in bad circumstances. I'm actually the first woman in my family that has never been beat on by her spouse in the past 5 generations that we know of. I have some issues, I'm well aware. I am planning to seek out therapy once things are back to. Normal.

Anyway, one of my "issues" is that I did catch my boyfriend watching porn. He would wait for me to go to bed to jerk off becaus he said he liked watching gang bands and stuff like that... I'll never be willing to do that. Anything close to that. He's the only man I've ever even so much as KISSED. he was my first boyfriend, kiss, lover, EVERYTHING.

The first time I caught him, he said he would stop. It hurt me and basically made me wonder why I'm not good enough. And I've struggled with it for some time. This was a year ago, I caught him doing it AGAIN a few months ago after her promised he stopped. In 4 years it's. Been the closest to splitting up that we've been. So I put parental blocks on our internet. I then changed the password to our router controls and switched everything to my name so he would have no control or way to unblock these websites. I even went and looked up a list of the more popular porn sites (about 10) and black listed them so that even if somehow the parental block gets lifted, he still can't access them


Is this going too far? He knows I did it, I told him I put blocks on. He said it doesn't bother him, but is this extreme?

[Fatherhere901]

That is going too far. But, not because your trying to save your relationship, but, what your doing to try to save it.

By blocking him from the internet and, best description, "treating him like a child", you are no longer treating him like a human being, but as your underling. If this is what you want for a partner, then by all means have at it. But, if you want an equal partner to go through life, then end the relationship without "tying his hands". Kick him out because he is not the "man" you want, not the "boy" who doesn't mind.

[blkgold33]

Look if he not cheating on you just let the guy beat his meat. When was the last time you had 10/10 sex with him

[Asker]

Me having sex with him isn't the problem... or maybe I'm just not good enough at it? I don't know, I try to do whatever he tells me he likes. Even butt stuff which I'm not fond of (I don't HATE it, and it doesn't hurt, it just feels like I'm pooping on him every time so it's not my favorite thing is all), but I try to do it almost every day or be available whenever he feels like. He's always the one that rejects me and he was waiting for me to go to bed to do it.

[ellkell]

Just because he likes porn doesn't mean he doesn't like having sex with you. And the type of porn he likes doesn't dictate the type of sex he must have in order to enjoy himself.

[Dargil]

A.5 Extraordinary conditions require extraordinary action.

[Thisperson98]

If anyone put restrictions on my internet, I would be pissed. Plus I would remove them in a matter of minutes.

[Asker]

he's not great with technology so he literally doesn't know how to. He's almost 30 where as in 22... i grew up with EVERYTHING. But I told him when I did it and he didn't get mad literally at all. He said as long as I'm not blocking his friends he doesn't care. He said he knows he did wrong and that he's trying to change , and while I think his friends are stupid I wouldn't block them.

[Tiger288]

Why u block him to look in porn? It's not like he cheat on u.

[Anonymous]

Why is he jerking off instead of having sex with you?

[Asker]

Exactly it hurt my feelings

[Opinion Owner]

The porn isn’t the issue on its own. It’s him choosing masturbation over you. Don’t ask about porn als about that.

[Asker]

He always says that it's just a problem he's always had and that he knows it isn't okay and that he's sorry and he'll do better... and I gotta say .. since I've blocked all the porn I haven't had that problem that I've noticed

[Opinion Owner]

From your comments below it sounds like you’re up for anything he likes and are actually much more accommodating then most women. I think the porn block may actually be a good idea for him hit it should really be a joint decision and something he wants.

[Anonymous]

No not really it keeps them safe from like hackers and stuff like that.