This is a fairly normal experience. Men in general have lower standards for sex then dating. What that means is that men would sleep with many more women then they’d date. Turn it around and it means for most women, there are many more men who’d sleep with you then date you. It’s just how it works. so best advice:
- don’t avoid “putting guys off” by being clear up front you’re looking to date to find a relationship. The guys it scares off would have been a waste of your (and their) time. Guys who are interested in a relationship are not put off by girls who are looking for one.
- nothing you said suggests this is an issue but a general note - don’t take interest in sex as meaning he only wants sex. Guys aren’t looking for sex OR a relationship. They’re looking for sex OR a sexual relationship. Some girls interpret both those as “just sex”
- keep being the best version of you that you can. The more appealing you are the more guys will want to date you, and the higher percent of guys interested will want to date.
You can't take it personally as "something is wrong with me". It's them. You could be any woman. The guys you're dating are only looking for sex, not a relationship. Simple as that. And it's quite common these days. Keep looking. It's frustrating and hard I know, but you'll find someone.
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Simply, because you are physically attractive to them (which means they want to have sex with you), but they don't know you, so they don't (yet) have any reason to want a relationship with you.
This is an issue that virtually every attractive woman has to deal with: 50 guys who just want to bang her for every one who is interested in a relationship with her. But since you are shy, you aren't meeting a ton of guys, and they aren't getting to experience much of your personality, so the ratio is actually worse for you, because all the know about you is what you look like.
While you are young, you will always have guys who just want to sleep with you - in your 20s, you are universally attractive to nearly all men regardless of age - but you won't get guys interested in dating you until they know more about your personality, which means you need to try to be a little more outgoing, even if it's just baby steps. Let guys - especially guys you are interested in - learn more about your personality by getting into conversations with them or around them, and try to be relaxed and have fun and be SEEN as being fun in those conversations, and before long, the relationship interest will start happening.
You’re going out with boys who only care about sex
It may be that you are subconsciously giving signals that you are available and receptive, or perhaps it is because of the guys you are choosing. Pay a picture of yourself as you would normally dress for a first date and we can give you more specific feedback.
It could simply be that because you're shy, you only end up with guys who are very confident because you probably wait for guys to make a move, and they probably have to be a little persistent to get you out of your shell. The guys who are the most confident and the most likely to do that will tend to be players, whereas the average guy just looking for a nice girlfriend is likely to assume that the reason you're quiet and don't reciprocate his interest is that you're not interested.
Guys always want to have sex... it is normal. Be flattered that they want you but also be selective unless you just want a random hookup
Your age group.
I'm in my early twenties
I know, that's your problem. Very few guys in their twenties looking for something serious and a lot of the ones that are habve no idea what they really want. Now, that's not to say all guys in their thirties and even forties are better, some never truly grow up, but they get better usually.
The question is why don't you? I mean if you bothered going out with the guy then he definitely appeals to you otherwise why even give him the time of day.
Now I'm not saying sleep with any who asks but it seems like the idea repulses you as if they mean you an offense. The truth is when a guy wants to sleep with you then you're attractive to him and that's a compliment if nothing else, if the feeling is mutual then nothing is stopping you from going through with it.
She said they're looking to have sex and nothing more. She wants a relationship. Not someone who only wants her for sex.
My entire argument never justified those who want her only for sex. But my point is that sometimes guys want a relationship and sex too. Its not that the second someone mentions sex it means he doesn't want anything else.
I'm aware. Was just informing you that her question was why they look for only sex and nothing more.
Sounds clichey but its not all in how you dress. This will sound funny but one reason could be that you let them. Depending on where you live and how many guys you have been with you might have a rep that the guys think that is all you are interested in or that you are easy and not really girlfriend material and I mean that as no offense, but there were girls in college who would wonder the same thing. One was a former girlfriend who after we broke up got very free with her body. A guy ask for a bj and she would give it without even a date. A couple guys who had "benefited" one day brought 3 other guys and she did a split roast with all 5 of them rotating. Now after that she really had a hell of a time finding a guy. She did finally get married but he is a loser, ex con and some have said gang member so many do not think of it but people do tend to judge. There is nothing wrong with feeling good and if you enjoy sex have it but they always say women play a sex to get love and men play at love to get sex. Hope that helps. Maybe not serve the desert so quick if that is what you are doing. Make the guy work for it. Tell guys look i want a relationship. Post an online dating ad and make it clear you are looking for a relationship if that is what you want.
Most guys under 25 are only interested in casual sex so, if you're average looking or better, chances are you're going to encounter a lot of guys who just want to f**k you
"Why do guys only want to have sex with me?"
And nobody else? Wow!
Well most girls have more guys that are interested in fucking them than guys that are interested in dating them and if the type of guys you date are guys that lots of other women also want then you have to recognize they don't really have much incentive to commit to one girl when they know they have a large pool of women willing to sleep with them. Another factor is people assume that you've probably had sex right away in the past with other guys and want to try their luck at getting the same.
Also feminists always talk about the importance of "exploring one's sexuality". Maybe thats what those guys want to do.
I wouldn't take it personally. At 18-24 yr old most guys will want to sleep with every woman they come into contact woth
You must be extra attractive I don’t know. Your personality too.
what do you want more then that?
Because you must have very appealing sexual traits..
Higher sex appeal can make this happen..
Maybe you just don't excite or intrigue them. Women forget that they need to impress guys too. Y'all need game. Girl game is weak as hell.
what all do they do that tells you that us all they want?
Try and go out somewhere where decent people hang out.
Try a chess club or something.
You are doing something wrong
LOL... you're very attractive why else?
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