Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Does he wants me to be his girlfriend? Does he loves me?

We are seeing more then 2 years.
During that time he said that he loves me but I didn't said anything to that.
He called me to go for a drink but I never wanted. He asked me for a serious relationship but I didn't said anything. That was one year ago.
A two months ago he asked me during sex do I love him, I said yes I think and he asked me again and I didn't sais anything and he asked me again and again and I said yes. Later I sais that I am not sure if I love him, he didn't said anything.
Last night we were together, he was very happy to see me, he called me "my love".
And two times again he called me love, my love.
During conversation he asked me "Do you love my dick?" I said yes and he smiled. I asked him "Why are you smiling?" and he said "You all love my dick, you're nice with me, but you go home right away and I'm left alone.
I asked him, "What would you like?" and he replied "I want a girlfriend, to be in a relationship with her, just to sleep with her, to love me. Isn't that nice?", I said yes, it is. And he said "But I can't fall in love."
Updates:
+1 y
He said "I can't fall in love". But I think he said in the sense that there were other girls but he didn't fall in love with any of them yet. Or maybe he thought he was already in love so he couldn’t fall in love?
+1 y
He asked me to be his girlfriend
1 6

Most Helpful Guys

  • It sounds a lot like the guy loves you more than you love him, he was frequently saying he loves you and asking you out and asking if you love him, you state that a number of times you either didn't say anything back or you said yes, but part of me feels like you said yes on those times because you felt either pity for him or felt aggravated by him asking so much.

    You also say that you said to him that you don't know if you love him, which is a strong way of telling that he isn't the one for you.

    The guy sounds like he loved you a lot in the beginning but later on began to realise things would never happen between you both, and that his love would always be unrequited, that being said that he states at the end "But I can't fall in love" this can either be that he is saying he can't fall in love with you because it will hurt him, or that he can't fall in love with anyone else because he is too attached to you.

    His desires at the bottom don't sound too greedy, he stated that he wants someone to be with him, someone to love him and part of me is now thinking that maybe there is something emotional going on in his life where he wants someone to love him to make him feel better, a sense of closure.

    But I am well known for over analysing things, this is just my personal view on the story you provided :)

  • This is kind of confusing.
    He asked a year ago, then came back and asked again. But, it was during sex which can change the dynamic of the whole thing. You have different chemicals released by the body during sex that can make you feel closer to someone. I have an entire article I wrote on this on our website.

    Then he started calling you "my love" and turned around and asked you if you loved his dick? What? In and of itself that is confusing. That's like asking if "Do you love me, or what I can offer? Pick one." That's just really confusing signals to me. No wonder your asking. I would be asking as well.

    Personally, I think he likes the idea of a girlfriend but doesn't want the commitment of a girlfriend. He wants a person he can all that stuff with, but without the attachment side of things. I would say he wants you to fill that role but not get too involved or expect too much out of him on the "boyfriend" side.

    I would take this slow. It sounds a lot like mind games. If you say you "love" him then it opens the door for him to start playing emotional games with you. I would say you really need to look at what you have and ask yourself what you are looking for.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I think he may heave meant he can’t fall in love bc you won’t share his feelings. at least from his behavior that’s what I get. But the best way to know is first to sit with yourself and with full honesty think about what you want. Do you want him? Not physically but as a person. Can you see sharing years of your life with him? If the automatic answer isn’t yes or you get a sinking feeling then maybe you don’t and you should be fair and put your cards on the table. Ask him what he wants and tell him what you want. If you simply don’t match the. Move on before someone gets hurt. Always calm and composed but honest talk. Luck sis!!

    • Ohh I really like this one too 😊😊

    • Well said!

  • It sounds like you both aren't compatible, and both aren't in a relationship for the right reasons. Yes he does love you, and wants you to be his girlfriend, but you pushed him so far now that he doesn't want to fall in love with you bc you dont love him the way he wants to love you. I might be wrong, but thats what i got from your post. Hope you both can just be friends. Hope for the best.

    • Yeah I’m with you. You said exactly what I was thinking. 😊

    • @VIVANT thanks for the MHO 😊

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 79

  • That's all very strange. I'm wondering how much is getting lost in translation. What do you want?

  • If this isn't obvious, I don't know what is. He is definitely in love with you and he needs a girlfriend and he would love you to be his girlfriend. I can totally feel what he's going through. Even if you don't love him, if you at least care for him, give him a chance, play along in his game. Ge is very close to despair because we, as men, don't always want just sex, we want affection and love, we want to know that we have something by our side at all times, to whom we could talk about anything at all times.

  • No offense, but he sounds like a total dick to me.

    He's an asshole using you for his own needs.
    My advice... If you're not looking for a relationship, but just a fling, then it's okay. Otherwise, ditch him.

    Coz I don't feel like he's giving you the respect you need as a WOMAN. I felt more like he sees you as a TOOL to satisfy his own needs.

    So don't get emotionally close with him, unless you wanna get hurt by this dude.

  • He doesn't want to fall in love with you but he truly enjoys using your naked body for sex, and he wants you to love him so he can boost his ego. This doesn't sound like a contender for a good serious relationship.

    • Yeah

  • He said you can fall in love or was he talking about himself , if he was talking about himself ,, walk away ,, because the day you tell him you love him and want him he's going to walk it's as if he wants to hurt you as if he thinks if he says it enough to you ,, you will say it back and that's when he is gone,,, if he talk about you your just being careful and don't want to be hurt so you don't let him in that far

  • Not sure if this is the same dude as before but you seem to sleep with a lot of people who just use you for sex. If that's your thing cool. But if you're looking for a relationship go find someone who is also looking for the same.

    • I think it's the opposite. I think she's using HIM for sex.

  • If he said he loved you and you had a serious conversation outside of the bed room it b easier to tell. You guys can't trust anything said when your body is pumping all those sex drugs ti your brain. If you want to see where your at ho on a coulple of dates in public and see how the conversation is

  • He was able to change your mind about love, 2 years forward he was trying to also change your mind about marriage and children, interestingly he never seem to needed to change your mind about sex, as you seem to love his dick from the very beginning. :)

  • I'm a little confused as to what YOU want from this relationship, so I don't know how you think he is supposed to know? It sounds like you are sending mixed signals? Maybe he's telling you what he thinks you want to hear?
    Do YOU love him? Do YOU want to be with him? Are YOU in love with him? Can you clarify, please?

  • He doesn't want you to be his girlfriend he wants love in his life and without saying anything to you he is waiting you would be the one loving him and telling yourself.

    • See I told you he loves you

    • 💕💕💕

  • Yes but it seems like you’re not interested

    • agreed.

  • He sounds confused. He seems like he wants to bounce around instead of getting too serious yet... I'm not exactly sure what he wants because he has not made that clear or even clearly stated it. He is seeming to avoid commitment though, that seems pretty clear

    • He is scared of commitment and settling down it's sounds like

    • That's good to hear that he committed to that

  • He seems to love you more than you love him.

    But I could be wrong.

  • He does, but only if you love him. He doesn't want you to pretend or be half a girlfriend like you are at the moment.

  • the question suggests you want to know what he wants but i think from reading through the rest of it that its clear he wants you to be his girlfriend... the real question should be, what you want and for that answer you need to really ask yourself and get past this two years of messing him around because he won't hang around forever waiting for you to decide

  • Why are you having sex with him?

  • He could love you, or he could just like the idea of loving you. depends if he actually has anything in common other than this sex. But ethier way your choice to be with him or not and if you just wanna keep friends with benefits say it.

  • and you didn't ask a follow up question after he said that?

    • Which question? Can you tell me? He is saying this to me for months, but he wants to see me more often.

    • why can't he fall in love? what's stopping him?

  • He is in love he just doesn’t want to admit it , pretty much making you chase him

    • Is he affraid that I will nit say I love you too?

    • Yup , he is holding a wall up so he doesn’t scare you away , he finds you amazing and to take the chance to lose that he is going to retry to play hard to get , Girls love that chase

    • LOL what did you say

    • Show All

  • Let me get this straight. A guy is saying he loves you and is asking to be in a relationship with you.

    And your question is whether he loves you and wants to be in a relationship with you?

    This is either narcissism or a level of female nature I simply dont understand.

  • Show More (61)

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