How to not hide your face and make eye contact during sex?

[Laceyxxx]

In my past, making eye contact during sex never was an issue for me. Nor was wanting to hide/cover my face.

2 years ago I was in a very Abusive relationship, which ended up in him being arrested for domestic abuse to the 1st degree. The last thing he said to me was “you’re nothing special to look at & just a warm body to fuck”

to this day, that sticks with me. I know it shouldn’t, but it does. I’m currently in a Healthy & happy relationship. However It’s been brought up how I always hide and cover my face. He didn’t mention eye contact, but I know That’s something I lack in too.

Any tips on how to overcome this? I know it’s a really vulnerable thing, but also I just fear that maybe he’ll look at me and maybe feel the same.

girls & guys ; please help.

[bluehen46]

I don;t know you but you are woth so much more than that and i am glad you are out of it. You are person and no one deserves taht. Listen to me. I am in an abusive relatinship with my wife and have been told i should leave but never will. Mostly out of guilt, but do as i say not as i do
Is your current fella aware? that might help and he will ( if he is a good guy) kiss you, tell you how beautiful you are and he wants to see your pretty face while you make love.

Abuse does stick with us. I think every time i have thought of changing my situation when she said for the first time ever in 16 years a few months ago "No one else will want you" And i can't get past that.

[Anonymous]

Your man needs to take the lead role in this one. He needs to be dominant enough to make you look him in the eye, and caring enough to reassure you and positively reinforce it when you do.

[Laceyxxx]

I love this. What ways can I suggest he does this without coming off rude?

[Opinion Owner]

Just tell him that you're tired of feeling that way, that you want to be able to look in his eyes and at his face so you can feel closer to him and see his pleasure, and that the only way (and the funnest way, really) to change it is to have him take control and make you do it until it becomes something you're not afraid of anymore.

[AustinMan]

I'm so very, very sorry that happened to you. You're clearly traumatized. Find a good therapist and work through the issues.

[Archerer]

Just hang out naked with him for extended periods and do a lot of foreplay but not sex, I’m talking like 6 hours, by then you’ll be comfortable in your body with him

[Anonymous]

Don't wanna put this publicly, but there is nothing wrong with it. But if you really want to be more close during the sex, I'd recommend switching positions. Maybe something you haven't done with your ex. Also if tou try new things in bed it will for sure build some extra trust and you'll feel better as well, more confident per se. If you haven't tried anal, you should, just because the experience will bring both of you together even more.

[Anonymous]

I think you should try making more eye contact in day to day life and not just sex. When you do that , it is not that intimidating all of a sudden while sex since you do it in everyday life as well

And I strongly think you should tell your current partner why you want to hide your face and not look him directly while sex. He can help you better than strangers giving tips online.
If you tell him , he will take it slowly and nicely and help you rebuild the trust you lost with that asshole in the previous relationship

[Opinion Owner]

not telling him will only create more problems than it will solve. Telling him everything is a part of trusting him and you will only be able to solve your problem when you trust him.