Does the law need to change to prosecute minors who lie (and sleep with) to legal adults about their age?

[Anonymous]

Just for the record I’ve never had this problem. In my 20s and early 30s I did hook up with some much younger women (youngest was 19) but I was always careful to check their age. About 5 years ago I asked a girl to see her drivers license before sex. She was definitely 19.

But I have heard of few incidents where underage girls (and maybe boys too?) lie to an adult saying their 18 or 19 when they are 14 to 17. Some 14 year olds look 18 and some 18 year olds look 14. This happened to a buddy of mine my freshman year in college. But he was 19 and the girl told him she was 18. They hooked up at a neighborhood party. He found a few days later she was really 15 and he was not surprisingly paranoid as all hell. Fortunately for him nothing ever came out of it. But I remember asking him “hey she lied to you” and he said “no that doesn’t matter with the law. Look it up”. I did and he was right. In my state the legal code explicitly says that minor misrepresenting her/his age doesn’t matter.

Anyway I’m way past the age where I’ll be ever partying with HS kids so I‘m not worried. But I hear about this often and it still bothers me. Does anybody agree the legislation needs to change? We should always protect minors from predators but at the same time what about my friend who made a very dangerous mistake?

[Quackthulu]

For sure. If they want to act like and adult they should be tried as an adult.

[Asker]

And it should be a significant mitigation factor for the adult too (if he can prove the minor lied which may be tough but still)

[VanityFair748]

I think if you think that girl is lying, asking her to show her id or driving license is totaly enough.

[Asker]

Yeah but how many 19 and 20 year old guys are used to asking girls for their IDs? If she’s showing him intense interest or worse they are both at a party drinking (which is common) it’s not likely he will think of that. Of course he’s a legal adult and shouldn’t be stupid. But it’s NOT okay for minors to lie. Different story if she told him the truth and he went about it anyway.

[Asker]

Also some young teen girls (14 to 16) can notoriously look older than their real age of they put on makeup and dress up right. Again nothing I’ll likely have to worry in my lifetime. But just saying

[verylovelyguy]

it's tough to hold minors legally accountable under our system

[magiusX26]

yes. that type of situation makes the minor the predator

[Anonymous]

Yeah I think there ought to be some discretion with the law. I lied about my age when I was 16 to have sex with older guys because I knew they wouldn’t have done it otherwise. I knew exactly what I was doing. That being said, it should be case by case because a lot of young girls are taken advantage of by guys.

[Asker]

Thank you for being honest. Realize if you both got caught back then THEY would be punished and you would be let off Scott free. You would just be a “victim” (cough). But at the end of the day it was consensual and you knew what where doing. Doesn’t sound like you got any mental hang ups about having sex with those guys either. It’s not easy to prove if the minor lied but there have been a few incidents were it was plain as day. I think the law is purposely draconian to prevent guys coming up with bs excuses. But again sometimes as you admitted this happens. It’s just wrong.

[Opinion Owner]

Now that I look back on it, yeah, they would’ve been in trouble if it had been found out, regardless of what I would have said. I was too immature at the time to realize the consequences of my deception. I was a wild sexually active teenager who schemed on a couple of occasions to get older guys to have sex with me just because I was infatuated with them. No I’m not scarred from it or anything. I initiated it but I am ashamed of how I acted and wish I could take it back.

[Asker]

Well the whole law is meant to protect minors. But you wanted it, enjoyed it and you didn’t get knocked up. So really no harm no foul right? But again if this law gets at all more lax towards the older guys/girls then the real creeps out there will be more encouraged to do shitty things. There just needs to be a balance though to protect innocent older guys (and women) from walking into jail bait. Even if they just get probation there is a good chance they will be labeled a sex offender. That’s worse than jail time in many ways in my opinion.

[Opinion Owner]

That’s where a state’s attorney should look at the facts and maybe decline prosecution in certain cases.