Why do I only get approached by weirdos?

[Anonymous]

I'm 26 years old, living in a big U. S. city, and my dating life is tragic. The only guys who approach me are desperate weirdos, and I don't know how to change it. The most recent guy ended our second date by telling me I look like his favorite porn star. Another guy (after I broke things off) actually tracked down my address and tried to get into my building because apparently I needed to "justify" why I'd dumped him. There was also this one guy I used to work with who would text me at least once a week during quarantine saying things like "Thinking about you..." I mean... ugh!!! Why do I only get approached by desperate, gross men? People tell me I'm attractive (5'8", 130lbs, natural blonde, green eyes, 32DD boobs, long legs, good teeth) and I have a pretty good life: I'm in consulting in the tech industry, have great friends, I volunteer, I read a ton on subjects like history, politics, science, etc. I genuinely don't understand what would be unattractive about that to normal men. Can someone help me?

[Jamie1865]

Jesus!!! I didn't know if I should laugh or cry when I read that!! He said you looked like his favourite porn star... well - it's a compliment... of a fashion :D :D :D
I think your problem is your chosen profession! I'm a developer/tester, and of the 200 or so people in my department who are male, I'm trying to think of any who are not (at least a BIT) weird. It is a stereotype, but on the whole (and I include myself here, because I have a clinical diagnosis) we're all aspergers as fuck.
So that's the 2/3rd's of the dept who are men. Of the women in the department, only about 10% of them are weird, the rest are normal (ish) so they have to put up working in a department that's run by geeks, kooks, savants and misfits.
I don't know where in the US that you live, but for what it's worth, I'll give the same advice to you as I do to my female friends in the states - go to a local rugby club on a Saturday or Sunday (find out which day they play) and if you want to meet intelligent, solvent, fit and healthy men (and women) who love a laugh and a bit of fun, but have a set of values and are as 'normal' as it's possible to be - that's the place for you. There's no meatheads, it's not like American Football, all knuckle dragging and testosterone and chest beating, it's an aggressive game but very tactical and a bit like soccer in its fluidity - so you won't be standing there bored stiff watching a game for 5 hours that keeps stopping and starting. 80 minutes on the field then into the clubhouse for a few pints then onto a few bars/restaurant (when there's not a global pandemic...)
Otherwise, you've got Tinder or dating guys from work... At least he didn't say you looked like his SECOND favourite porn star... ;) :D

[Anonymous]

Men approach who they want to date. Maybe you’re too nice as well and that could be an open invitation too. Being nice means it’s finally someone who isn’t going to become toxic against them for trying. So they will view it as a chance to finally make a move. After awhile some guys inside become wrecked when they hear “go fuck yourself freak, why are you talking to me!” Not all w9men are like that though so when most guys deal with caring, nice women to them it means there’s at least a chance. Lot of them can become infatuated and overwhelmed that someone is finally being normal to them. So it’s going to be awhile for some of them to move on.

[Nuespeed]

Well when you're attarctive you will be approached by those type of guys it just natural in my opinion id say you just have to becareful and make sure you are dating a guy who is safe to be around.

[OlderThanILook]

Maybe you put out the same kind of vibes?

[DCooper]

I would guess part of it is the large city part, there are just more weirdos per square mile. And part is probably due to social spots being closed, normal guys don't see any appropriate place left to approach women. Sure there are the dating sites, but those have been so thoroughly discredited that most normal healthy men don't bother with them anymore. I don't know, but that must reduce the normal encounters, which would make the weird ones a bigger proportion.

[MiamiMadness]

Maybe it’s where you live?

[Chiefbenttwig]

Because you are a weirdo.
Change your atmosphere & the type of intellect that you engae in & your problem should resolve it's self

[Browneye57]

Because your total focus is always ALL about YOU. And you haven't done the work to make you a high value proposition. So you attract the weirdos instead of the high-value guys.
I'd say your picker is broken.
Next you'll tell us you're finding them on a dating app. LOL

[COMMODOREII]

What a life. Lol

[Twalli]

Studies show that as a man's wealth/income increaseshis prefered boob size decreases. I guess that could be a reason.

[In_Trance]

the law of attraction says like attracts like

[Potatocream]

I don't know for sure but my guess is you just date the guys that jump out to you so maybe look for guys who dknt talk to as much but you like and dont start dating them if there are any red flags 😂

[JamesBlackDragon]

Try approaching yourself and see if the results change

[MrCanada]

Lol the joys of dating. Don’t kid your self. I have had my share of crazy women too. It’s the world we live in.

[jcost0913]

"Normal" guys are probably just intimidated, those weirdo's are already desperate so they probably just think they have nothing left to lose anyway lol

[Ooopoooopsicles]

sadly they see the perfect package and they do everything to get it. But i won't i dont feel i have the energy but you do sound very atractive☺.

[Anonymous]

well then maybe you should start approaching men, since you see those who approach you as some kind of creep
Then when they shut you down you will realize it’s a lot harder than you think and you will stop acting like an entitled asshole.

[Anonymous]

Those are the normal guys.

How many guys have rejected your advances?

[Anonymous]

If you would provide us an image of yourself, it might be easier for us to tell you.