Almost 30 and never have being sexy?

I'm 29 soon I will be 30. In this point of my life I have never felt sexy: I'm not fat, I'm in a healthy weight but I have never being fit, always had some flaccidity, my butt never was beatiful and hard and I don't have big tits. I also have acne problems, they are not severe but in order to be almost 30 it feels weird.

My boyfriend (who seems to me super sexy, literaly it's my first time being with a guy that I find my perfect physical type) told me he finds me super atractive, but I don't know, I wonder if I'm wrong for never experience my body as super healthy and, as a consecuence, sexy.

I'm a thinker, aka nerd (currently graduate student), should I focust more in my appearence?
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Superb Opinion

  • No, definitely do not focus on your appearance... it seems to be a vicious cycle! Unfortunately this seems to be a sort of madening trend amongst the young generation of having to feel sexy or awesome or somehow different from the rest of the crowd.. I truly believe that these are just hypes, the same as finding this one true love at first sight... sure you might find true love, but it's most of the time not as hyped up as people believe it to be! As lo g as you feel good in your skin and are healthy, everything is great! With this whole having to be more toned and sexy trend there will always be work involved and one will never be satisfied with the outcome because it is a continuous achievement and not a constant state... just my opinion! 😊 just stay healthy and happy!!

    • I started to got focused more in my inteligence the moment I felt ugly (at a very young age) I was thinking "If I can't be pretty, at least I will be smart", but with the years I started wonder if it will not be better to find a balance or to work more to fit the standars. Thank you for your words, to be healthy definitevily sound like a better goal than try to be someting that was being built by ideals. Thank you for your advise.

Most Helpful Girl


  • I know that the media and society pressure us to have to feel/look sexy and that is why many women think that is important. But, feeling sexy is more than seeing yourself in shape is related to attitude and what you project to others.
    In the end, the most important thing is that you feel comfortable with yourself.

    • For sure! I was super unsure of my appearance in my first date with my boyfriend that I almost forget how to talk because I was so self conscious of my appearance think how bad I might look. Thanks for giving a female perspective.

    • Is absolutely comprehensive what you say, I think is normal to feel insecure sometimes. Try to highlight what you consider are your strong points and don't be hard with yourself. People who love you value you for who you are

Most Helpful Guys

  • If you don't think you are sexy, there are plenty of things you can do to make yourself feel that way. Get physically fit and focus on your glutes. Change your hair style to something that makes you feel hot. Wear clothes that you really like, ones that make you go "wow." Sexiness isn't entirely about how you look to the opposite sex. It's about appearing attractive in your own eyes and reveling in the confidence boost you get from it.

    • Best advice ever. Yes I try to explore a sexier behave and attitude but sometimes I'm super critic with myself. Thanks for those words, they really help and makes me think of other approaches.

  • Well if you have an attractive boyfriend who tells you that you're attractive and that doesn't make you feel sexy then I don't know what to tell you. I think you should be grateful that you get to have sex with somebody who you think is sexy. Some of us are just left with the scraps. Like myself.. I get sex, but haven't had sex with someone that I'm attracted to in years.

    • Thank you for that perspective. I know that feeling too. My ex and I were in a long term relationship for 8 years, and I loved him but he was not my physical type. That meant ten years of not having sex with somebody who I though was sexy. Literally, first time in life. So, if in some sense this comment help, sooner or later you will be able to have sex with your type.

    • Thank you for that, and I hope so.

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 8
  • Ok so what t do u want to do about it how about this let me dress you let me get you wherevu wantvto go try it i know you will love it

  • You should focus more on your self-esteem. If you haven't learned by 30 that looks are a fading good, you are gonna have a rough awakening very soon when they do start to fade.

  • you should focus on believing your boyfriend when he tells you he's attracted to you. And yeah, some sexy outfit will help.

  • Small tits are aturn on for me. I can't really speak for the rest, but you don't need to change anything. Your boyfriend seems to like it and that's all that matters

  • Sexy is mostly mindset, not physical.

    • I'm curious, what will you say you consider a sexy mindset, in which terms?

    • Confident, loyal, smart, sassy, seeking HARMONY not conflict, playful, knows how to smile.

    • Great, thank you.

  • You just dosent finde a men who tell you that i think that you are very sexy

  • It's your self esteem that needs the focus. You have to learn to accept yourself the way you are. Your boyfriend loves your body, it's you that doesn't.

  • My guess is, he had to hit you up first