Why a guy says he is afraid of commitment but is only seeing me and having sex with me only?

[Anonymous]

I have been casually seeing this guy for 4 months and casually because the word dating scares him right now because he is afraid of commitment because he is afraid the label will change things when things are good between us currently. Technically its not an exclusive relationship, but I asked him today if he was seeing other girls or having sex with anyone else just because ai was curious. He said that he had no interest in seeing anyone else and that he enjoys having sex with just me and that he is not involved with anyone else and is not interested in other girls. He is 3 years younger than me, but we have a great connection and chemistry. He always wants me to initiate spending time together and kissing and sex which I think is strange. He said his sisters told him its more respectful for a guy to let the girl initiate. When we first met I was a virgin and he was very respectful and patient with me he waited 4 months to have sex and we worked our way up to it we didn’t go straight to sex it took a couple of intimate encounters until I was ready and he was very kind and patient with me which I appreciated very much. Does this guy see me more than a friends with benefits? I like him more than a friend with benefits and he knows that because I told him initially when we first met, but I told him I was willing to take things slow since he was not ready for a relationship when i first met him due to his most recent bad relationship from 8 months ago. Has anyone ever progressed from a friends with benefits to a committed relationship?

[Berethor]

Actually technically you are in exclusive relationship unless he lie to you about not having sex with anyone else, but officially you are not in exclusive relationship. He always wants you to be the one who initiate kissing and sex even though he knows that you he is your first? did you was the one who initiated kissing and sex even when you was virgin? you told him I was willing to take things slow, but you already had sex with him, is sex considered a trivial thing nowadays? the real question is why you had sex without commitment if commitment is important you, especially if you was virgin, something that automatically made you more valuable for a serious relationship. You should had waited until marriage or at least until you are his official girlfriend, as a virgin you should not had compromised on less, even if you are 3 years older than him, you should not be so desperate, late 20s was still early to be so desperate, but maybe not all lost, and he might still make you a honest woman, just make sure that he would not leave you for other girl, after you had already given him everything, what you had given his is not only sex but also your precious virginity.

[btbc92]

Because commitment takes work. And he knows that if he commits, he's not going to get as much stuff as he wants. He's only having sex with you, because you were selfishly allowing him to get it without committing. Bad enough this is a sin to be doing before marriage anyway, but you only hurting yourself. You've been doing for 4 months and you now have to ask this question. The problem is not him. The problem is you. Because you're the one with the common sense, you should not be doing this not only before you were married, but if you know you want commitment, why would you do this just to think you didn't commit when you know you're not getting it anyway? This guy does not care about you. He doesn't care about no one else but himself. But at the same time he doesn't even love himself either. So you really need to ask yourself what it is that you're doing, and what is it about you that makes you attracted to this person, and you still choose to have sex with him anyway. Because if he's the one that's not going to commit to you, and is using sex to get out of you, then that only means one thing. Not only does he not love himself, but deep down inside you don't love yourself either. You are who you attract.

[Pyrofox]

Cause thats all a guy really wants is the pleasure and not the negatives that having a girlfriend brings. This new wave as of recent of feminism really has chased a lot of great guys off in some cases entirely.