Why don't men worry about the consequences when having sex?

[Anonymous]

Most men would say they don't want an unplanned kid or an STD. At the same time, the vast majority would jump at the chance to have unprotected sex with women. Many would even cum in the woman when they barely know her! When the chance for sex comes around, why do men throw all sense out the window and see a very high risk situation as high reward instead?

An example would be a man saying he would never have a child outside of a relationship and does not want STDs, but an average looking woman takes him home with her, swears she doesn't have any STDs, tells him she's using birth control that he cannot verify, and begs him to cum in her. He happily does while telling himself that he may never get another chance like this, and this is such an amazing opportunity!

6 weeks later she's pregnant, keeping the baby, and he has Herpes 1 virus and HIV... Is it really that worth it? What is happening in a man's mind?

[btbc92]

Because women are freely having sex before marriage also, so men domt care as long as it doesn't PERSOANLLY affect them. They can detach and attach at will sexually, and most STDs do not affect them as much it does us. They don't have to worry about carrying a child for not onths approximately, or an abortion. We are forced to do it everything. We're all they got to do is basically pay child support God forbid if they're not even married to you. Then when it comes down to alimony God forbid in what happens, then they better about having to do that. We women have to be more responsible and our choices. If they don't want to stop being in sexual send, they may have to be responsible and knowing that they cannot control with the other what you want to do. They can only be in control what they choose to do.

Only very few even worry about that. That's why they choose a partner wisely and they don't engage in sexual sin. And if they did in the past, they definitely stop doing what they did in the past. And they would not engaged with that kind of Lifestyle with another person who is also in that lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Oh absolutely, all women should be considered to be the lying sacks of shit that they almost certainly are, thats clearly what we need, after all its a great look on women when they speak about men in that way. Lets style that shit out.

I dont think men really consider themselves to have any control over their reproduction, they obviously do to some degree but you are obviously incapable of putting yourself into the males position and understand what it is like to live with the idea that you have no final say your whole life, it doesn't matter what i think or what i want, that choice isn't for mine and it never will be.

I can choose to opt out, sure, but only at the cost of complete abstainence, even if i tried to control my reproduction condoms fail one time in 50 so its some what like pissing into the wind.

As for STDs they just aren't actually all that common, not in the UK at least, most people dont have them and most are treatable, fucking without condoms feels better and most young people are completely incapable of processing any kind of risk, they all think that consequence is an abstract, something that happens to someone else but never to them.

As for older men, Im not really sure, my expectation would be that they wwould be more inclined to use protection and perhaps exercise more control over their reproduction but i dont know if there is any data which would support or refute that idea.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

You fail to understand that most people are generally honest about birth control and STD's and when your partner tells you that they are clean and safe, people tend to trust them, especially if up to that point, no reason for distrust has been present.

Most YOUNGER men haven't learned yet that a number of women they have sex with will lie to them, cheat on them, and put them in danger. That's a failure that starts with our lack of a functional sexual education system.

When I was young, I had fallen into the fake trust a few times and can only count myself lucky that I never got in trouble or an std. I saw many friends get tricked into parenthood or std's, and holy shit - two guys I know for a fact were tricked into sex and then had to try to fight rape allegations - and both lost and their lives were (and still are) ruined.

There's some really really shitty women out there who are just bent on destroying men, or taking a man's wealth, and I'm completely disgusted by some of the things I've seen.

Don't put all of this exclusively on men. Sure, we need to do more to protect ourselves, but most of the failings you mention here are not that men are conveniently ignorant, but that they are overly trusting.

[Asker]

If that were true, then half of all people would not catch an STD at some point... People lie about sex all the time. They even lie about how many partners they have had. Sex ed is just fine in most places. It's just a lack of listening to what you've been taught. No one put anything exclusively on men... My question was just specifically about men and for men.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

My answer is still the same in the end- young men (young people really) tend to be more trusting because assholes haven't yet made them bitter and soiled. Isn't that what happens to all of us on some level? We all start out innocent and someone comes along and steals it from us one way or another, and as it happens more we just get more bitter and disappointed to the point that some of us go out and ruin the innocence of others? It's not much different from a cycle of abuse I suppose.

[Mystic_Nova]

Has to do with optimistic bias. They dont believe it will happen to them, until it does.

[Asker]

Oh wow, I've heard many men say those words... "I didn't think it would happen". I have to look up optimistic bias now. Thank you!

[Mystic_Nova]

No probs. Youllbseebit has to do with adolescents a lot, but, it is legit the idea of a person not believing something bad will happen to themselves, because they are somehow special or it just isn't a thing likley to happen to them

[RemoErdosain]

What is going on is he's just too horny to think straight. I also had unprotected sex with my ex, and then found out she was cheating on me with several men. Now I'm worried sick, and getting checked for STDs. We had been talking for awhile, I thought I knew her, she told me, like you said, that she was clean, and I trusted her to a big fault

[Asker]

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry to hear that. I will hope that you did not catch anything and everything works out for the best for you! I see this happening so much, and it worries me.

[RemoErdosain]

Thank you, I hope at least I didn't catch anything big. I assume I probably caught something not that serious, like herpes, because she was a total whore without my knowledge, but if I didn't get HIV, I should consider myself lucky

[RemoErdosain]

Not to say herpes wouldn't be a bit of a pain in the ass, but I mean, from the research I made, the only problem with it is it doesn't get cured, but doesn't affect anything but the genitals, and the outbursts become less frequent and painful with time, so that's what I mean by considering myself lucky if I caught just that

[DCooper]

Because a lot of guys are dumb as a box of rocks once they start thinking with the wrong head.

[DIRKINOFF]

That's an awfully broad generalization. When I was married I got a vasectomy after my third kid. After my divorce I still wore condoms to prevent the spread of anybstds to my sweet sweet ween.

[Asker]

If you read through comments, it's pretty accurate based on unplanned pregnancy and STD statistics. Sure, some men are careful. Most are not.

[DIRKINOFF]

It may be true but birth control and protection against STDs are the responsibility of both parties, so the woman is just as much to blame as the men for unwanted pregnancies and warts and milky white discharges, etc. At least if they don't insist on their partner, be it long term or anonymous, use a prophylactic.

[Roberto5643]

If guys thought with their big head istead of his little head

[AmeerX]

Isn't sex something that makes people senses dull?

[TheFlak38]

should we hold your beer 30 year old woman? How many abortions have you had? How many times did you demonstrate with your land-whale feminists dressed in a giant vagina suit?

[Asker]

I have never had any abortions. I have two healthy, wonderful children with my husband. I am personally against birth control outside of natural family planning and pulling out. I'm not a feminazi. I think women should have an equal chance to do any work if they are capable of completing it as well if not better, and I feel the same for men. So, I'm pro equality opportunity if anything, but not particularly a feminist. You should work on that chip on your shoulder. That cannot be healthy, hon.

[TheFlak38]

Exactly the dumb reply I was expecting to get. The reply of a post-wall 30-something year old woman who all of a sudden "is not a feminist" and realises that her looks have faded away so the only way to lock down a man is with marriage and kids. If you want equal opportunities you're de facto an ugly aggressive feminist. If you claim you're not then get off gag and get the fuck back into the kitchen. Where is your masculine husband to take that fuckin phone off your hands?

[Asker]

Rofl, my looks have definitely not faded away. I look like a hot 18 year old... Both in person and on here when I posted my pic asking people to guess my age. The women in my family don't age until around 50-70. People think my kids belong to my mom and my husband must be my dad since he looks his age. I've never had to lock down any men. I've never had to be single a day in my life since pre-K. 80% of my friends are hot, successful men who think I'm hot and say if I'm ever single they want to call dibbs on marrying me next. Makes my husband even more proud that he got to me first, calls me his trophy wife. Are you really so uneducated as to think that women were in kitchens throughout all of history? And men weren't? So funny. You are a very bitter, insecure, and angry person. How does one end up that way? Bad parents or bad genes or both?

[TheFlak38]

Guess how many fucks I give about what your husband calls you. A man who wears love goggles. Very trustworthy.

[Twalli]

I would have to trust the girl is tell7ngvthe truth about the STD, if she lying and I die she'll be brought up on criminal charges. As for having a kid, it sure as hell didn't come from me.

[asshole_]

Because men can't get "pregnant"

[Guardian45]

There are 3 consequences I can see. Pregnancy. An STD. Or a psycho.

The first two are easy to control. The last one NOT SO MUCH!

[JamesBlackDragon]

When it comes to STd's the man should be prepared but so shut the woman just like when it comes to unwanted children both parties are at fault

If he doesn't have protection and she decides to sleep with him she's part of the blame as well or vice versa

[ronaldo75]

Stop generalizing. I worry about the consequences and so do many other men I know.

[Asker]

Then, clearly, this was not meant for you. Everything is not about you, hon.

[ronaldo75]

Sweetie I didn't say it was about me. "At the same time, the vast majority would jump at the chance to have unprotected sex with women." - That's a generalization. More WOMAN beg for unprotected sex than men. I've seen women literally break up with men or deny them sex because the guy wants to put on a condom. You post is really the one that's self-centered not mine. Hon.

[Asker]

All of the men I have ever met, no matter what the level of intelligence or job, have been okay with unprotected sex outside of a whopping TWO. That would be thousands of men I have worked with, been friends with, etc. l There's a reason why nearly half of children in this country are unplanned.

"Currently, an astonishing 45 percent of the 6 million pregnancies in the United States each year are unintended. Every year, millions of women, married and unmarried, young and not so young, are getting an outcome — pregnancy — that they didn't plan on or desire."

www.google.com/url

Not to mention,

"One in two sexually active persons will contract an STI by age 25."

old.ashasexualhealth.org/stdsstis/statistics/

[ronaldo75]

So unplanned children are the result of MEN wanting unprotected sex and not women opening their legs for a condomless penis. Oh, ok I see your logic now. Even when a woman is involved it's still the man's fault.

[Asker]

So, tell me again how everyone is using protection with everyone and not sticking it into anyone unprotected... These numbers don't even take into account the many people doing this and not catching an STD or who use birth control and do not get pregnant. That equals more than half of all people if you cannot keep up. So, when I say MOST, I have educated myself, done my homework, and go straight to the source. Most men are not you.

[Asker]

I never placed fault anywhere. That entire line of conversation is on you. It takes two to tango. My question above is specifically meant for men only. No blame included.

[B2281]

Because men who don't worry about that are stupid.

[Yellovv]

Because some of the guy getting horny they don't think about that risk..

[Gregthegreatandholy]

Except for getting AIDS or having to paying for a kid?

[Anonymous]

It's a two way street as a female friend of mine fucks multiple men unprotected whether it's a ONS or a regular friends with benefits without knowing their sexual history or STI status!

[Anonymous]

For the same reason a starving African would prefer actual food but would eat any food they could find even if it wasn’t the best for them.

[Anonymous]

I think most of them don't understand how common STDs are; that or a lack of understanding statistics.

[Anonymous]

Men are programmed to have sex. Evolution cares about one thing and that's survival of a species, and you only need two things for that: food and sex. You're thinking men approach sex the way people approach eating, like pizza is good but grilled chicken is healthier. That's not how the wiring works for men and sex, and the urge isn't a craving like food either. The urge is mind altering. The brain will fight a man's attempts to think of the negative consequences of having sex, and it fights even harder when a man thinks he should pull out.

[Asker]

Oh wow, can you provide me with a graphic description of what the brain is thinking/feeling/doing when it is altered this way?

[Opinion Owner]

Well, the brain certainly isn't going through a pros and cons debate with itself. It's 100% "we're putting our seed in a nice female". Of course, not all men, myself included, don't walk around trying to get laid all day everyday, but the trick to that is deciding what you consider to be nice. If I'm not attracted to her personality, I'm not interested, so I'm able to just turn it off then. If I enjoy her personality, I will definitely pursue and make sure she's comfortable around me. I never want to be labeled as a dog, so I control myself to make it nice and comforting, so much so that I'll often miss the cues that it's okay to go further.