How do you cope with not having sex or a relationship?

[Anonymous]

I’m 23, and made the decision to remain single and a virgin for the rest of my life at 18. To make a long story short, I am currently obese (obviously why I’m single and a virgin right now). However, once I lose the weight, I’ll still look awful due to saggy boobs, loose skin, deep stretch marks, strawberry skin, etc. I won’t have the body of a normal woman, skinny or fat, and I don’t want to be in a relationship/intimate with a guy knowing he can do better and save myself the embarrassment of showing my body.

However, I am still human. As much as I know it’s the right decision for me, I’d be lying if I said I don’t want those things and I occasionally think about it. Everyone has time frames where they aren’t sexually active or in a relationship. How do/did you cope with it?

Disclaimer: I don’t want pity or brutal opinions on my decision, because it won’t change it.

[ThiccBoai]

Maybe once you've reached your goal you could start accepting how you look and take a relationship and have sex anyway. Bit that's up to you ofcourse.

My way of dealing with being single and not having sex is simple, yet hard. Accept it. I have accepted that I'm single now, might find someone later and until than have to enjoy my time alone. I also remind myself of the joys of being single. I can do whatever I want. Wanna stay in bed? Go ahead. Nobody waking you up because she wants to do something. No need to worry about 2 agenda's when it's just you. Wanna go outside and sit somewhere in nature and relax for who knows how long? What you waiting for?

That's how I do it. Accepting it, enjoying the good stuff and not worrg about wha could be. By worrying avout stuff you only make it worse

[Anonymous]

I think it’s best to just focus on being your most comfortable best self. Everything will fall into place when that happens. I had a girlfriend that thought like that and it’s toxic to see yourself in a negative manner. It fucked up our relationship in many ways like she always thought I would go for someone else (think I’ll cheat and accuse me often).


The point is do what makes you happy. Life will feel so much better when you are doing things you enjoy and working on yourself to be better. I focus my energy on being healthier both mind and body because of the things I enjoy like hiking, partying, and etc. I hope things look up for you.

[Opinion Owner]

Also I cope with those time frames by talking to people so I don’t feel alone and focus my energy more on doing things I love or experiment on improving myself (like different workouts, learning a new skill set)

[PrudentGuy]

no I can't. Somehow instinctively, I crave both.

Hence I worked my way to have a little extra cash, get my date and finally start a sex-filled lifestyle with her.

And i feel contented after that.

For a girl, I think how should learn to fill the emotional gap of a guy. When he likes you, you'll enter a relationship that hopefully will eventually turn sexual.

I think its a life's pursuit we should enjoy while we're still young and sexual.

[djmzes]

Simple

[teamvic]

you're just gonna have to get as kinky as you can so you're satisfied

[MrNameless]

You can lose the excess skin through surgery. Focus on being healthy, and don't let that prevent you from experiencing sex

[Matthew2222]

Plenty of guys like bigger girls, you should have no issue finding a guy that likes you for who you are if you bother to look. I do agree on the weight loss though, that route never works out like people think it will.

[20yearsolder]

Number one, stop putting yourself down. Number two, there is someone out there for you. Number three, there is nothing wrong with pleasuring yourself. You should explore your body so that when you do meet someone, you know exactly what feels good to you

[ryancg]

If you want those things, then work to get those things. Your willingness to give up on yourself is far less attractive than anything else.

[Dchrls78104]

You just cope. Sex isn't food, and bodily fluids are not drink; living without them won't kill you. There are other things that you can focus on while you are not sexually active.

[Quidthonian]

I have been single all my life for other reasons. Yes, I was overweight myself which induced shyness.
What is helping me through is my introversion. I simply enjoy being alone. I do interact with people like neighbours, and random strangers. At nights, I sleep alone. I do dream of being involved with that someone special.
For sex, I release the built-up tension into a sex toy.

[Twalli]

I seek one.

[Tstrbrainer]

Just engage in some activities you enjoy

[bassinguy76]

I would not be in a relationship without sex. That's just a friend

[Anonymous]

Masterbation is how I cope. Lots and lots of masterbation.

[Anonymous]

I’m still going through that seven years after my divorce. I just look up different types of porno and edge myself along with some occasional wet dreams.