I FAKE ORGASMS WITH BOYFRIEND?

I’ve been doing it since we’ve been dating a year ago. I don’t think he can make me cum. He is pleased with himself thinking he is satisfying me, but he isn’t. HELP. Am I too deep in?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Why don't you try actually teaching him (like verbally telling him) how to make you cum, rather than just laying there, hoping he fucks up his routine one day and gets it right? I don't understand why so many women struggle with taking ownership of their sex lives. You faking your orgasms and hoping he gets it right one day is like printing the wrong instruction manual in Chinese, handing it to a Portuguese man, and then asking the man in English, why your IKEA is fucked up.

  • Well, that depends- are you willing to come clean and be honest going forward? That's what it's going to take.

    • What repercussions will it have?

    • I don't know. He's certainly not going to feel good about realizing he's not satisfying you, or that you lied to him about it- but he's going to find out sooner or later, so it's probably better to plan out what you want to talk about and then do it. The direct route "I lied to you about having orgasms from sex with you" may be the best option, but it's definitely going to hurt his feelings- depending on the guy, and your relationship with him, you may be able to go a little gentler. Now, I'm not going to refrain from saying you shouldn't've lied, since you shouldn't've, but feeling guilty won't make anything better, so let's think through how to fix this. If the goal is to get the relationship back on track, you need to find out what DOES get you off, and how you can get him to switch over to that. You may have to get creative here, and it may call for some experimentation on your part. I'd suggest against trying to simply say "Let's try something new" without coming clean; even if he doesn't get suspicious, eventually he's going to fall back on what he thinks will work, and it won't, and things won't be good for either of you.

    • It might not have to be drawn-out confession, though; I'm not seeking to humiliate you. Draw on your masturbation experiences and think how he could mimic them. This isn't something as simple as "pass me that vibrator", either; if he can't help you anatomically, he's going to be humiliated. You MIGHT be able pull off a cock ring or something like that, but the goal is to supplement his equipment, not supplant it. Once you've got the idea firmly in your head, think of another way to do it with him. Then another. Think of how you could gradually transition from one to the next. As best as you can, recreate the experience by yourself- does it produce the desired results? If so, you're good to go. If not, make some changes and try again. When you have a basic map, make something of a production of the next time you have sex. Tell him there's something new you're excited to try, and introduce the idea. This is where you're going to have to tailor it to him, since I don't know the guy.

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What Girls & Guys Said

10 25
  • You dug your own grave. Don't fake your orgasms. Help your partner learn how to satisfy your needs. How is he supposed to know you're not satisfied when you fake it?

  • Just stop faking it. If you want to save embarrassment for both of you, don't admit to previously faking and start asking for what you want today.

  • So what is it you want to know ,, how to please you and give you an orgasm that's easy first of all from the first touch the first kiss the first eye contact he makes it about you in slow motion and passion if you want I can tell you step by step how to make you have the best real orgasms at 1 time

  • If you fake an orgasm you deserve a fake orgasm.

    by the way way, EVERY girl different, he isn't a bad lover, you are a bad communicator.

  • You need to say something so he can fix it your just digging yourself a bigger hole by telling lies instead of the truth and you have lost out on a years worth of extra orgasms which makes no sense

  • I think this happens a lot. We’re all different after all, and sometimes, however great the guy, then just can’t do it for you, even if you show them.
    Don’t feel bad about it.
    Show him what might work, or find someone new. Men assume they can please us the same way, and that just doesn’t cut it in the real world.

    • They think that real women are like the ones in porn

    • Exactly

  • You've dug yourself in a hole here but doing it initially and now you have to keep it up otherwise he'll think something is wrong. Tone it down a little, maybe try something that will get you off during sex?

  • Yes, find your self someone that can really do a number and you will find your self so good dick.

  • I think you should talk to him...

  • Thats why I never do that

  • Not everyone is pro. Well sit and talk to him. Google some techniques for him to make you cum and for better pleasure. It is important to discuss your needs in bed. If you want him to do something tell him.

  • well i hope you realize that if you fake orgasms, the joke is on you, cause then he won't bother getting better to please you, cause he thinks he already does...

    so i think this is a rough situation you steered yourself into but i think coming clean and trying to be respectfull, NOT shifting all the blame to him but taking the blame yourself (which if you're honest it is your fault that you're in this situation), i think you have a chance at improving the situation for both of you.

    it will definitely be a big pill to swallow for him. but if you don't make the mistake of blaming it on him, i think itcan work out for you.

  • Why didn’t you talk to him?

  • This makes you a liar and is so wrong. Shame on you for not telling him how to make you cum

  • You're fucking pathetic. I hope he leaves you. You must be terrible at communicating. My worst fear in life was being with a person like you. FAKE as fuck. You should be ashamed of yourself and break up with him for his own good. How hard is it to tell him how you like to be touched or pleased and allow him to learn your body? How is hard is that? It's not unless your selfish. "Oh, let me just fake it because I'm too weak to tell him".

    • Calm down sweetie.

  • The problem with this is that you are cheating yourself out of receiving the pleasure you deserve, and this can ultimately cause problems.

  • You have to tell him. I would want to know to up my game and do the necessary Research to get you over the line. My advice, tell him he doesn’t make you cum the last couple of months. If he is decent guy he would ask you what he can do better. You deserve to be satisfied!

  • yikes

  • Do you fake them all the time

    • Yes every time we have sex

  • yup. too deep

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