Should I ask my boyfriend about sharing me with another man?

[Anonymous]

It’s not any guy in particular that I want, and I don’t just want to sleep with him, I want to sleep with both of them at the same time. I really don't know how my boyfriend would react to this, but I don’t want to go my whole life never knowing if he would.

Some of the porn he's told me he's watched makes me think maybe he would be open to the idea. I love my boyfriend very much and I’m not interested in pursuing a relationship with the other guy but i just want to experience two men at the same time. I think my boyfriend and I will be together for a very long time as we have always talked about kids and marriage, so my worry is if I ask, I might put this at risk, but if I don't ask, I'll always wonder!

What would you guys do?

[Anonymous]

Everybody has fantasies, and most people will not reveal them because they're afraid of the reaction they might get from their partner. The most important thing here is trust.

The safest way I'd say is to ask him first about his sexual fantasies, and ask him to be completely honest. Let him know that you won't react badly to anything he suggests or ever hold it against him. That if you don't want to do something you'll simply say "no".

For example, like most guys I've fantasised about threesomes with two women. I did eventually do that with an friends with benefits and her friend, but it felt safer with her, never with a girlfriend because I didn't want to ask it in case she took it the wrong way. It really didn't have anything to do with my attraction to her or anything either, but that's the way many women would take it.

Once you do that, he'll most likely ask you the same thing. He can't hold anything against you if he reveals something himself. But then you also just need to reassure him that it's not about your attraction to him, or to another guy, that you're not gonna leave if you try it, and that he can say no if he wants to.

[Anonymous]

When he’s talking about it in porn, that is the right time to bring it up. (Or if he ever asks about a threesome with another woman, then it’s fair game.) Start by asking generally before making it personal. If he mentions an MMF, ask, “could you ever do that?” A lot of guys don’t want to be that close to another guy because they feel it would be gay. The tissue that separates your vagina and your rectum is quite thin and he would absolutely feel the other guy. (I assume this is what you mean by “sleeping” with them at the same time.) Ask if he’s ever considered that. If you get positive answers, bring it closer to home. “Could you ever do that with your own girlfriend or would you have to be the other guy with another couple?”

[Asker]

That's a really good way to suggest it, thanks :)

[Opinion Owner]

Thank you for MHO.

[Asker]

You are very welcome :)

[ohshee]

That the one thing about saying ok I'm ready to settle down ,, you do and then find you want or nerd to explore another part of you. And you start to drive yourself crazy thinking or wanting it so bad you have to ask your self the min you tell him what you want ,, if he says no then it's always going to be in the back of his mind your doing it ,, I'm single and have many fantasy I want or would love to fulfill and with this covid 19 it just really sucks lol I don't believe in cheating but what happens if you meant a guy became friend one day you go to his house and the next thing you know some other guy shows up and says let's do it lol

[summiter]

I think you should ask him. We only live once and why not experiment and have fun. How is your sex life with your boyfriend? Maybe tell him that it is a fantasy of yours but you would be open to trying it if he agrees.

[ThiccBoai]

What I would do is wait until we have a conversation about sex or something close to it (if it doesn't happen naturally I'll steer the conversation to it). I will then send the convo into the right direction and at some point ask him if he has any sexual fantasies that he's never tried before. After talking about his for a minute I'll bring up mine. I'm hoping that by that point we both have something that we want to try. If so I'll ask if we should try it out and start discussing the details. If not, I'll ask him what he would think about my fantasy and see what's possible. If it all works out, we can try it, if not we don't do anything different.

That's what I advice to you

[ava00]

Don't ask him directly. Ask him what kinda fantasies he has and see if he brings something like this up and go from there.

[boggboss]

Bring it up ask how he would feel about doing new stuff and add then in a go from there who knows

[KilledByBees]

Open and honest communication.

[magiusX26]

so you want to ask him for a mmf threesome, gotcha

[AmeerX]

I think he will be okay considering the information you provided

[oncpl]

Have some talk with him about 3some, without showing your own interest. You can concoct a story asking for his intention.

[Wise4myage]

Do you watch porn together? If so, next time you are doing it, just ask him how he feels about threesomes in general and go from there.

[joeldalton]

I'd dump your ass in an instant.

[katieB12]

do you watch porn together?

[Asker]

We've been watching some since Covid started, yeah.

[In_Trance]

good luck with that

[andy530]

Go for it!

[REDHOTLINE]

Hmm you are a hot woman. You want fiil both of your holes same time

[gangs_and_guns]

3some can ruin your relationship. Do it 2 other guys and dont tell your boyfriend 🤷‍♂️

[KingJared24]

He’s not anybody else’s boyfriend so just grow a pair and ask him

[gandolph3]

do you want to pick the other guy, or do you want me to

[6twiztid6mindz6]

Never hurts to share your fantasies with your partner...

[Anonymous]

ask him, a lot of guys enjoy that