Sexual Relationships
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Please Help My Sex Life! How Do I Ask For What I Need?

So I’ve only ever been with two guys, one was my ex, and the other is this guy I’m currently in a very... non-labeled “thing” (idfk).

Anyway, he’s a bit bigger than my ex, and he fucking tears me every goddamn time. And I know I’m wet during sex, but it’s when we’re first starting that things are difficult because I’m particularly... tight I guess and it takes some work to get started. I want to tell him “hey, dude, either eat me out, use lube, spit start this, or at least spread my damn pussy juice around” cause ommmgggg he’s thick and the tearing is starting to become a problem.

Once we get going it’s fine, but starting out is impossible. I don’t know how to talk to him about this without ruining things. Me being too tight was a problem in my last relationship too and almost got me dumped because it was too much work but I managed to work around it. With this new guy he’s even bigger and that means more work, I don’t want to fuck things up.

HELP!
0 3

Most Helpful Guys

  • If you are tight, you are a prize. My current girlfriend was so tight it was like trying to put it in a wall with no hole (bending in half).

    He won't feel insulted if you tell him he's too big to stick it in like a smaller guy.

    Just let him know he needs to warm you up, he will probably really like it. I think you are just a little affected by your previous boyfriend wanting to leave because of it. He was a fool to let a tight girl go. So many guys would jump at the chance to have a girlfriend like that.

    I doubt the odds are your boyfriend doesn't want to give you the best experience. We take pride in being the best. I you need warming up, he is VERY likely to do exactly what you need. And I'm sure you will get plenty of DM's offering to replace him.

    Ask all your real life guy friend if they would be considerate of your situation if you were with them. They will probably be jealous of your boyfriend.

  • A few options here.

    1. Lube up, before you start. Re-apply, if needed.

    2. There is a toy called a venus butterfly vibe. That straps around your waist and vibes your clit. You can still do all the regular positions. It's just gonna' help you cum.

    Do these two things before penetration.

    As far as fore-play goes. It's always a good idea for him to make you cum with tongue and fingers, before he puts his dick in.

    Even if it means using a stronger vibrator, as he kisses you and licks your boobs etc as foreplay.

    I'm if anything small downstairs. Borderline average. These things work for me. So as he has an advantage over me, I'm sure he can give you better sex.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Boost his ego while you tell him and he'll be more receptive. Tell him his cock is just too big and you need him to get your lips wet to fit him in initially.

    • You'll want to work on your blowjob skills and make that a featured part of your foreplay build up. Performing for him can give you more time to juice up. Plus you can tell him what he needs to know as part of your dirty talk. Also, you should encourage him to exchange some 69 as part of the build up. Other men are right that if you let him know it's all because of how big he is, he'll learn to love it. Most important thing is that you be willing to put a bit of exhibition into it so that you both enjoy the several stages that you need. Lastly be sure to let him know how much more pleasure you can share when he takes his time in stretching you out. Oh - and kegel exercises in the shower. Enjoy!

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 15

  • You need to tell him! If he's hurting you, that's no good. TELL THE MAN.

  • The “work” you mention is called foreplay. And I do not think I am so different by loving foreplay. I will caress, finger, lick, etc., for some time before entering. In fact, I prefer she have at least one orgasm before I enter. Speak up and let him know you want those things! You sound like a great gal and I cannot imagine any guy not putting in a lot of effort to please you. Just speak up.

  • You should just tell him he is very gifted and sometimes it hurts. Then tell him what you like.

    Believe me he will do what you want. Especially him actively knowing you think he is on the bigger side.

    Communication is huge and you both should tell each other what you like and don't like.

  • Definitely be open with him about it. He probably notices something around it but don't quite know. He'll be complimented, just tell him. When he will do it ur pussy will feel so much better for him that he'll love that too!
    Communication.

  • Tell him he's so big you need a bit more prep before he sticks it in. Most guys like to hear they're big.

  • You're not too tight. He's not too big. You're not turned on enough. He doesn't get that. I don't understand how you can't have a conversation about it after you already smashed.

    • it’s the labia minora and majora that are the issue. He literally has to spread and stretch my pussy every time and he’s literally thicker than anything I’ve ever had in me before, and even when I’m playing with myself with my own toys I need time to stretch myself.

  • Orrrr you could stop having premarital sex and embrace your lord and savior, harlot

  • Just tell him it's that simple

  • Pm me

  • Directly

  • Ask him to start very slow

  • he would know that he need to make you wet. sleep with a guy who knows that.

  • just tell him, be honest

  • Just tell him, guys like women to be direct

  • just tell him he probably doesn't realize it

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