24 d

I don’t know what to do?

I have strict parents and I have been sexually active with my boyfriend and all we use our condoms and I need to take birth control so that we could be safer but the only way for me to get birth control is to tell my mother that I need it and for her to take me somewhere because I don’t know anything about birth control and I am very afraid to tell her that I have been sexually active my boyfriend because she told me to wait a year of dating to have sex and my boyfriend have only been dating for five months and I wish really badly that I could talk with her about this but she has a terrible Temper and I think she’ll tell my dad who doesn’t believe in sex until marriage I am very scared because this is something I’ve never had to go through and I don’t even know how to bring this up my mom is really angry all the time and I just want to get birth control to be safe and I can’t get them without her if I don’t know if I should wait until March 31 to tell her because that will be a full year know or if I should tell her now I really wish that I could just talk to her about this normally but she’s a very angry person And I really wish I could share this with her because I usually tell her everything like my first kiss all of that but I’m so scared because my parents are very strict I can’t even have my dad find out because he could have a heart attack and she might not allow me to go to my boyfriends house again because that’s where we do it I don’t know what to do can anybody help please I just wish I had a mom to talk to about birth control and all and I want to be able to talk to her about my experiences and if it’s normal to feel this way/ for sex to hurt but instead I’m keeping this a secret I wish I could tell her though I really do but I’m really scared about how she would react she has a very bad temper. I feel a bit sad too
Updates:
24 d
Condoms could break so I want to do birth control at the same time. I could only get them through my mom and if she takes me to a gyno or doctor my parents know everything about me from what I buy to where I go
24 d
My parents don’t even let me lie down with him on the couch that’s how strict they are
I don’t know what to do?
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