Is sexual intercourse an empty practice?

[LukeLugh]

Besides the conscious effort to procreate and build a family, it sex just another idle pleasure which cannot exceed the a priori (prior to knowing) promises within ones imagination?

[Jamie05rhs]

Of course it can exceed the A priori promises. Those who have never had sex can truly never know just how amazing it is.
However, if you're viewing it as just idle pleasure, then you will never get the full benefit of sex even after doing it multiple times. The truth is that even if sex is less than what you expected physically, it will be much more than you expected both spiritually and emotionally (if you're doing it right.)

[LukeLugh]

What is it to have great sex? I have had sex, but I do not think it was great. Hence the question.

[Jamie05rhs]

Why was your sex not great?

[LukeLugh]

For me it was the uncovering of reality over idle fantasy, in actual sex there is discussion and planning in which my intellect and need to be discreet take over. In fantasy, the subject/partner simply "does" which is contrary to reality wherein social negotiations are still present.

[Jamie05rhs]

Lol. Well, of course there's discussion and planning. You're dealing with two human beings, not two robots.

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks for the MHO!

[LukeLugh]

Well yeah, is just that gratification is more easily attained in fantasy... paradoxically.

[Jamie05rhs]

@LukeLugh Of course it's more easily attained. Because it's easier to access. But if you have a human being to have sex with, there's no need for fantasy. She's there! Right in front of you! In real life!

[LukeLugh]

What I mean is that the levels of arousal differ quite a bit. Especially if the partner isn't that attractive to the other. So there does seem to be a tangible variance.

[Jamie05rhs]

Dude... Don't have sex with someone you're not attracted to!! Common sense! 🤦

[LukeLugh]

Well the girl is question was semi attractive and uses her personality to seduce the mail. It was a a prima fascie type of attraction. Attraction is also subjective which may entail the physicality of the act being illusionary! We do not know to what extent physical pleasure is absolute!

[Jamie05rhs]

If you're attracted to someone at first sight, that usually means that you're truly physically attracted to them and that they are your type. (Not that you can't be truly attracted to someone later on as well. But if it's prima facie, it's 100%.)

[LukeLugh]

Well I inferred that there was an opportunity for sex, but opportunity is distinct from pure physical attraction. Arousal is triggered by the excitement of what may occur.

[Jamie05rhs]

Well, if it's all about sex, then the attraction could be an illusion.

[LukeLugh]

But is physical sex an illusion because of its subjectivity?

[Jamie05rhs]

Fuck no! Sex is very, very real!

[boggboss]

It can be used in that way or to convey feelings and intimacy as its a shared expirance

[LukeLugh]

That can be shared without sexual intercourse.

[AmandaYVR]

So I like your question, sort of, and that exchange between you and @jamie05rhs was great, very entertaining.

But I suspect you've never been with a girl/woman who you've been really, really into.
Sex is a base, carnal pleasure. It can be about procreation, love, or lust. It can be perfunctory when it lacks passion. And it can be mind-blowing when both people really love each other, and are in the first or early stages of discovering each other's bodies. Or maybe years down the road, when they've been through huge trials in life and still find great desire for one another.

The act itself is not enough to create an out of body experience, enlightenment, or fulfill the power of one's imagination, etc. But it is possible to have this. It is far from every time, but that's why it is so special - because of its rarity. And it is those moments that keep us coming back for it, for more, and bond us to certain people. We know those moments mean something, they are special.

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks, Amanda. I totally agree.

[mindNsoul]

Good sex starts in the mind. Without imagination, lust and desire sex is empty. It can feel worse than not having it. Or emptier than just masterbating to porn. You need to understand that sex is not the same with every partner you will do it with. And it is best when you can connect beyond your physical functionality. It is the anticipation. The selfless satisfaction you give to one another. Seeing her in joy and in pleasure for sharing her body, mind, heart and soul with you. People who have good sex usually have good chemistry and are in love. It's what takes place in between the acts. The feeling of missing someone and the burning desire to wanting to experience it again with her. It is also care, grace and trust.

Sex is not really about the logistics of it that was a mistake to assume so. The objective is not to cum or procreate. That was another mistake you made. And the third one would be having it with someone who you weren't connected with.

You need to really know yourself to truly be satisfied. I think for a deep thinker like yourself sex can never be satisfying without the satisfaction of the mind, without stimulation of the heart, and without inviting an absolute chaos to the imagination.

In other words, for a man like you sex has to become the ultimate true expression of yourself with another human being. It is when she looks into your eyes and strip you naked. Your heart, emotions, fear, dreams, desire, and thoughts. It is when you forget the logistics of it and sex become mere expression of yourself. A selfless act to give joy and share joy. Something many people don't really experience in a life time. It is when you want to make love when you're feeling at your lowest. Because that's how 'she' can cure and touch your deepest wounds and help them cure. And that's not just intercouse my friend. That's something way far beyond your bodily function.

[Jamie05rhs]

WOW! Very well said! I agree everything that you wrote there.

[Jamie05rhs]

"with"

[mindNsoul]

@Jamie05rhs thanks 🌹 I too saw your comment over there and man that was insightful and wise

[LukeLugh]

Your comment is one I have been looking for.

[Jamie05rhs]

@mindNsoul YW. And thank you! :). I appreciate that.

[mindNsoul]

@lukelugh glad to be able to help 🌹

[Anonymous]

Maybe you’re just gay..