Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Christians, what should this kid do?

Isaac is 13 years old and often has inappropriate thoughts about other boys his age. He's terrified and hates himself for it. He wants to rid of his feelings because he fears he's going to hell if he doesn't. Every time he has a wet dream he feels like throwing up. He cries himself to sleep because he hates himself for being gay. He prays to God everyday to remove it, but it doesn't help. In fact his friend, Owen, makes fun of him for being a gay Christian. Even going as far as making jokes about having sex with Jesus and saying oh my God, God, God, whenever he notices Issac has an erection in the locker room just to mess with him.

Issac is also terrified of sezusl thoughts because his father was very promiscuous with women and died from Aids.
0 0

Superb Opinion

  • , I was in a similar situation back when I was around that age, and while this isn't really my area of expertise, I think I might be able to help a little.

    Back when I was 12, me and one of the other dudes in my neighborhood started fooling around... not having sex, but just sexual games. Yes, I was really turned on by it.
    HOWEVER
    What is now realize is that it wasn't the other guy who turned me on, it was the fact that I hadn't really had any other serial situations at all in my life, and it was so new to me that I probably would have gotten turned on by it no matter who I was messing around with.
    The point I'm trying to make is that just because something turns you on doesn't mean you want it securely. A lot of women fantasize about rape scenarios, but they'd never actually want to be raped. Make sense?

    13 is the start of puberty, and he's probably going to have a lot of sexual thoughts about a lot of things, and the most important thing is that he DOESN'T assume that those things define who he is.
    Also, kids at that age are dumb and mean and hormonal and just was attention. His friends will probably grow out of insulting him in a year or two.

    Thats the most advice I can really fit into a post like this.

    I hope it helps :)

Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. He doesn't have a friend named Owen. He has a guy who makes fun of him, lowers his self-esteem and makes him feel bad. So first he needs to stop pretending he has a friend named Owen.

    2. He should seek counseling with his Church. If he feels it isn't safe there, there are a million places to go to get help as a young gay teen.

    3. He needs to accept he isn't alone. He needs to accept that God loves him no matter what. He needs to accept there are a lot of folks out there who struggle with thoughts of homosexuality, thoughts of being violent, thoughts of revenge, having illicit sex, etc., every single day, but God still loves them.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Just be kind when people feel not normal, when it IS normal.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

If women don’t enjoy penetration then why do they like sex?
What makes someone of opposite sex good in bed for you?
Is getting a circumcision the right answer in my case?
What is the safest way to dispose a used condom that was not your husband?

What Girls & Guys Said

1 12

  • The Pope just endorsed same sex marriages, I'd point that out for a start.

  • Sounds like Isaac has a lot of i internalized homophobia and self hate he needs to work through in order to accept himself. Counselling with an lgbt supportive therapist would help a lot.

  • He should talk to a youth pastor he trusts.

  • I thought the bigger issue was guilt in the eyes of a made up god story

  • He could try contacting the "Restored Hope Network" or "Changed" to talk to a counselor, most or all of whom have been in the same position. You can get a referral to either by calling 1-800-A-FAMILY.
    Having the inappropriate thoughts is not the sin- what you DO about it could be though.

    • At 16, Issac says fuck it and allows another teen ( male) to give him a blow job.

    • Is he screwed now?

    • I thought you said he was 13?

    • Show All

  • Not Christian, people can love whoever they want, y'all deal with it.

    • So do you believe a 30 year old should fuck a 13 year old and call it love?

  • The effects shame can have, especially with people who wear the mask of being kind and loving, like some Christians can be highly damaging to a persons self esteem. It can result in extreme trauma and deep psychological wounds.

  • Wet dreams are 100% natural. Christians believe masturbation is a sin. But it is natural.

    I believe most people are a bit Bi Curious. When I was 12, me and a couple male friends would compare penis sizes and jerk each other off.

    None of us is gay.

  • Do you plug an electric socket into a petrol engine?

  • 1) If you are Gay you can't be a Christian
    2) Guys get erections and that is normal
    3) I would bet you have given guys erections
    4) People have made fun of Christians since Jesus' days.

    • I see Pope Francis is backing same-sex civil unions now. Not that I consider the Pope a Christian, but I'm sure the Protestants have some similar kind of program.

  • Get counseling

  • I recommend counselling.

  • He should reach out and find others online or in person who he can relate to and who can help him realize that his feelings and thoughts are normal and healthy. I had a mentor like that at his age who helped me a lot to deprogram myself and feel better about my life and what I wanted. We also had a sexual relationship which was technically illegal lol.. but without him I might not be here today.

Latest Questions

Sexually frustrated, am I in the wrong?
I caught my girlfriend reading erotica on her ipad -- should I be concerned?
How to stop feeling self conscious about my butt?
Girls- Do you like to swallow a guys cum or is it nasty?
Home >  Sexual Relationships  > Christians, what should this kid do?