The sex in my relationship is not good, is this a valid reason to end things?

[Bbwbabygal]

Me and my boyfriend have been together officially for about 2 months, but seeing each other for close to 4. We never had sex until we were official (I would’ve done it sooner, but he never seemed to want to go any further if I tried to initiate things). The sex is just not good, we have only done it 3 times, but we see each other like 4-5 times a week.. I am really missing sex, but the problem is that I don’t even want to have sex with him because it just hasn’t been good for me at all. We have done other things almost every time we see each other, but giving head that much gets so tiring and I feel like I’m not getting the same satisfaction in return.. he fingers me, but he’s not good at it. I’ve tried to give him tips, but he just doesn’t seem to get it. Sometimes I am dryer than the Sahara desert, and I have never experienced this in any previous sexual encounters.

Overall I am emotionally happy and do have pretty strong feelings, but the sexual aspect of the relationship is just missing for me. I am constantly thinking about having sex with other people, and I feel really bad for it. I feel petty for considering ending the relationship over bad sex, but I feel like I’m going crazy without it. I am only 20, he’s 24, so maybe I am just hornier than he is. But I just feel like now is my prime young time, I wanna be having mind-blowing sex. But the other part of me also really wants this relationship to work, because I’ve now invested time and feelings. I feel like I am leaning more towards breaking up with him, but I also feel like I’m gonna break up with him, then get my sex fix from someone else, then regret breaking up. He really is a great guy who treats me incredible, he checks off all of the boxes except sexually, but I’m feeling like this may have to be a deal breaker.

What would you do? Is bad sex a valid reason to breakup? If I do decide to break up with him, do I tell him it’s because of the sex?

[v851234]

It sounds to me like he is near virginity level of experience or naive on hoe to please you, he should be listening to your direction on how to please you, if he can't do that while in charge, you should take charge push him in the right directions if he is unwilling to listen it suggests he doesn't care about you enjoying it, and if he isn't chasing for it either it suggests he is not that attracted to you.

I sent you a follow because I tried to pm this and more, felt awkward saying it here even though I'm just giving my honest opinion, not always comfortable with being 100% open so left a few things off.

[GingerGuy]

Yes it's valid. It's an important part of your relationship and happiness. You've tried to work on it and fix it and it's not working (is there anything else you can try do you think?). If you don't think there's anything else you can do, it's worth considering ending it. Bottom line, you're not totally happy with him. I feel that sex can always be worked on and fixed, however it also depends on the other person and how willing they are to work on it with you. I think if the rest of the relationship is good especially, then it's worth trying to work on, but it sounds like you've done that and it's still not working so maybe you're simply not sexually compatible?

[ArrowheadSW]

It could be that he just hasn't learned to enjoy pleasing his partner yet. And he is only 24 and sometimes people don't appreciate good sex until later. When I was 24 I had a high sex drive but I was so stressed out with my job and starting a new career that I had a lot on my mind and sex wasn't a priority. Just my thoughts.

[slatyb]

A very very good reason to break up. What’s the alternative? A lifetime of frustration. End it.

[SarahP080102]

Yeah.

[sabwafair]

I am so sorry to break the bad news. He not into you.

Let's say you're my Girlfriend and I liked you. When we came home from shopping I would back you up against the wall and kiss you in a way you're knees would buckel and your panties would just slide down your legs sopping wet. Then I would throw everything off the table and put you on top and make you beg for my Pounding Hard Cock inside of you.

If that not happening he is not into you. So sorry but to help you I must say the truth.

Does he finger you in the car? I would say no. What a waist !!

[Avicenna]

You really need to give it more time. Sometimes it takes awhile to get used to each other.

[bowenw]

Have a good talk with him to see if he's willing to try to improve. Perhaps you need to see a couple's therapist or sex therapist together. If he's into you he shouldn't object. If he doesn't believe there is a problem or doesn't want to try to improve you probably need to move on.

[In_Trance]

if the sex is no good, chances are there's other things that are no good; such as communication

[Jerre]

I would break up with him. Just tell him you are incompatible., Find a guy you like and who has a cock that will make you cum multiple times.

[Valnac]

That’s more than enough reason to dump him.
Just tell him it’s not working for you.
More mature men are more attentive.

[townhouse]

Yes it is

[Anonymous]

TELL HIM

[Anonymous]

This is why girls shud stay virgins until marriage. Ur ruined.

[Anonymous]

If you aren't happy and you don't think that you can fix it then you have to make a decision