Sexual Relationships
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I'm turning 18 and would like to explore bdsm I was wondering what is the safest way to go about it?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • There are TWO aspects... Bondage w/ Domination, wherein one seeks physical restraint in order to free oneself from the moral obligation and ability to deny another (the Master) from using One's physique as they may choose.

    The Restrained (at best) may have a 'safe word' to END this consensual role play.
    OBVIOUSLY, One must devoutly believe the Dominant WILL honor the 'safe word' contract.

    The second element, Sado-Masochism involves the giving... or enduring... physical & psychological pain.
    The French term for physical climax is 'Le petit Mort' = the little Death.
    The loss of perceiving One's own individuality amid the greater sensory experience of intrusive pain.

    In answer to your query, seek referrals to a PROFESSIONAL Dom, first.
    Amateur efforts offer FAR TOO HIGH a risk of injuries.
    Some professional Dom's offer perspective Sub's an opportunity to 'audition'.

    Its only 'kinky' ... the FIRST time.

    • Thank you

  • Being young and inexperienced, there are lot of wrong ways you can go. It is good you are reaching out to find answers. I would look at FetLife, which has a LOT of information, and meetups. Being a young female, you need to be real careful about who you meet and what they will offer you.
    My suggestion would be to just observe, learn, find out what it is all about. Many men and women will want to 'take you under their wing' and teach you. I would say no till you understood what the whole arena of the BDSM world is about (and it is HUGE). You could get really hurt and messed up with the wrong people.
    Go to meetup's and Munches. Take classes. READ. Know what you are getting into before you agree to any activity.
    Good luck. :)

    • Thank you

    • Welcome... if you have in Q's, PM me. Happy to chat.

    • Thanks for the MHO :)

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 19

  • Do it with someone you trust. Get a boyfriend and when comfortable get him to perform what you want.
    Much better than just getting someone you don't trust to have control

    • Thank you

  • www.everydayhealth.com/.../

    Read this article.
    I hope it helps.

    • Thank you

  • First off, you need to find someone you trust that will be a dom that meets your expectations

    • Thank you

  • Mam, you are under 18 currently, you can explore this when you get over 18, there are a lot of sites for that but you need to find a person who you can trust to indulge in it.

    • Thank you

    • You are welcome mam.

  • Research the subject matter find someone that you really trust agree on a safe word and have fun

    • Thank you

    • Your welcome just be safe

    • I read everyone's replies and we all said exactly the same thing, research someone you trust and a safe word. Lol

  • Get some bruises and falsely accuse the guy, that works really well.

    I'm turning 18 and would like to explore bdsm I was wondering what is the safest way to go about it?

  • First u need a partner to do it step 1 xd
    Step 2 talk to him or her that u wanna try this and see how it goes

    • Thank you

  • Safest would be to join those forums on BDSM and understand about its nature. Watch a few videos on it before you delve any further. It is a good experience to try but don't go too extreme too early. Take it step by step and set base rules for your partner and yourself as to what are the limits and boundaries. Also, you might need some level of openess to the new experience. Being too rigid doesn't cut it

    • Thank you

  • You really need a safe word or action

  • The first thing you need to do is read up on the subject so you can explore it without fucking yourself up.

    • Or fucking anyone else up if that's how you roll.

    • Thank you

  • Look it up on the internet.

  • I feel like we're too young for bdsm lol

    • Maybe but I rather try now and find if I like then later

    • I dont know anyone our age that has tried it. I'm just saying it might be hard to find a partner that is willing

    • That makes me kind of sad but I understand

  • First wait a dominant partner & learn together..

    • Thank you

  • Get on fetlife. com and ask questions

    • Thank you

  • Make sure it's with someone you trust completely. You can also see if you can find a public place that does this, like a sex club or something. I know that's hard right now with Covid as they are all shut down likely, but yeah, trust is the main thing.

    • Thank you

  • Lots of help out there.
    the key to this is what kind of bdsm and to what extent?

    are we talking compartmentalized (equals outside of sexual issues?), full-time, mixed? Etc. ddlg? And tons more.

    you will need to find a partner you love and trust completely and is compatible with your desires. A good dom will protect you and allow you a safe place to explore these desires.
    trust and love come first. Then establish some boundaries and go slow. Lots of people posing as doms or giving advice that is abusive.
    my S/O sounds a lot like you and I’ve had try things I’ve been uncomfortable doing at first but safe words, asking questions beforehand, following up after are all key.
    never should physical abuse be tolerated, ever.
    “Punishments” should never harm and be agreed upon and have immediate endings by safe words.
    a dom must care for the sub before himself (herself).
    be careful and don’t get hurt.

    • Thank you

  • Are you bi or lesbian?

    • No I'm not

    • Darn, well then in that case I would recommend finding an older gentleman in his late 30s or early 40s to show you the ropes.

    • Thank you

    • Show All

  • Are you a dominant, submissive, sadist, or masochist?

    • A submissive and a masochist

    • Well then you should find a patient dominant/sadist that enjoys teaching. But be careful most are more interested in taking advantage of a newbie sub.

    • Thank you

    • Show All

  • Don’t let this be an excuse to have casual sex, find a boyfriend

  • find a local partner your own age and learn together

    • Thank you

    • stay safe

    • I'll try my best

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Home >  Sexual Relationships  > I'm turning 18 and would like to explore bdsm I was wondering what is the safest way to go about it?