How should I even feel about this because right now I feel ugly and unwanted?

[Anonymous]

So I've been married for 13 years and had another baby 4 months ago. We have 4 kids together now. It's been 6 months since we've had sex, not for my lack of trying he never seemed interested would just watch tv. We've had sex once in the 6 months.
Anyways I found out recently on his Instagram that he has been following (multiple girls) and liking these very revealing/sexual photos from a girl who is on Onlyfans. I never even heard of it till then. This was during the time we weren't having sex, while I was still pregnant. I immediately got pissed and then burst into tears. I don't feel good enough for him if he has to go liking this girls ass and tits who's to say he doesn't actually have an Onlyfans account. he's always on his phone and very secretive.
I actually recently read an article where a woman found out her boyfriend was cheating on her on Onlyfans (Onlyfans isn't Porn), because she tried signing up on there with her fiances account etc and he already had one. I seriously dont even know what to do or think. I'm still very hurt (he doesn't know I found his social media account and I'm not about to tell him).
He doesn't talk to me about what he likes he doesn't seem very interested in sex with me anyways. Amd whats to say he's probably npt thinking about this girl or imagining I'm her while we are having sex?

[bowenw]

Perhaps if the sex is always at the same time of day, in the same place, in the same position, etc., it's not as exciting as it was when it was new. Try different things, for example some toys from a sex shop (e. g. vibrators, lubes, nipple clips, dildos, cock rings, etc.), role playing, or sex games. Watch porn together and try whatever is happening onscreen. Take photos or make your own porno. Go to a nude beach or adult resort. Think about having sex in different locations such as in the shower, kitchen, outdoors, white watching TV, in a vehicle, etc. Try tying him up and having your way with him and vice versa. If you have a bush, shave it or trim it. If you usually have intercourse, give him a hand job or blowjob. Swallow his cum if you don't usually provided you're both okay with it. Invite him to eat you to orgasm. Play with food, for example licking whipped cream off each other. Communication is key. If he still isn't interested it could be he is cheating, masturbating a lot, needs counselling, or has a medical issue such as depression.

[Red_Arrow]

Couples counseling! The couple goes together to a counselor whose specialty is getting couples to open up to each other. The counselor does not give their opinions, but gets the couple to express their inner feelings to each other. Many companies have insurance plans that pay for a certain number of sessions at no cost to the employee. Check that out.

[AshleyTaylorDanny]

Go the other direction with this and start looking at various girls online yourself and let your husband see you do it. Then you could ask him stuff like "honey I think she has a nice ass don't you" Then start dressing in sexy things and taking selfies, again let him see you doing this. If he asks tell him that you want to post some of your own pics to see how guys like them... ask if he has any ideas of pics you should take or what else you could wear. When he see you acting confident and sexy and wanting to post like the women he is following he will start taking some more interest. You guys could have a lot of fun doing this together.
We never have had any of these problems as we are very open about sexual stuff... I know he looks at women as so do I and men... but we ask each other stuff like "do you like what you see" or " Damn that looks good don't you think". Yes men are visual and so are women too although most won't admit to it... don't run from it run to it.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Sorry for what you're going through...
First, never let someone undermine your confidence in yourself... That you have 4 kids and still try to make time, put effort into your husband and your sex life shows you're trying to be a good wife... He should really appreciate that as some women don't pay enough attention to their husbands and their sex life...
But as for finding he's looking at other women, I would be completely honest both with what you found and how it makes you feel... Whether it can be resolved or not, it definitely won't if there is no communication about what the issues are and effort on his part as well to resolve them.. 13 years is a long time to be married these days... I truly hope you can resolve the issues and your marriage for all your sakes 💜🙏🏼

[yougurt]

What a piece of s*** for ignoring his pregnant wife and lusting over strangers on the internet. Confront him about it. If he says he's not attracted to your body anymore, don't apologize. He's the one who got you pregnant four times.

[iseekpinetrees]

Just sounds like he's probably masturbating a lot. But hiding his phone is usually cheating. I just had a baby few months ago so I know I'm touch n go with labido and emotions so hubby doesn't know when he's able to touch me half the time. Sit down and have a conversation with him. Communicate. Its the best way to get your feelings resolved.

[tae_ie]

woow, I’m so sorry, But listen you don’t need your husband’s acceptance to know your beautiful or wanted, I need you to know that you deserve better than the piece of shit, if he treats you like shit cut him off and do what’s best for you, so you keep on doing you and build yourself to be the women you wanna be. Good luck you got this.

[MathTeacher]

That sucks. Feeling ugly bc of your SO is the worst. Unfortunately he is going to do what he does. You should talk to him about it but if he doesn't change, you don't deserve that.

[meeso13]

You are beautiful, don't ever doubt that it's his loss for the way he's acting if he wants to love up against the phone screen instead of you. Got to the hair stylist treat yourself to a new look get an outfit or two now that your not pregnant anymore. Feel pretty for yourself and as result he just might be reminded of what he's missing

[DiversityHire]

That's damn shitty.

[Gedaria]

I think the problem, could be with him not you.
I know when my fourth daughter was born, I said no more.
I would not do with out a condom. And after I had the op she just wasn't interested. But started having bfs...

[Iceseeyou25]

This is insane. What happened? :/

[Valnac]

I’m not married but if I was, you would be my only interest.

[john23232323]

How can you cheat on only fans?

[jimmy2]

Ohhh God bless you

[gandolph3]

Do you need somelne to talk to

[bclbn77006]

you also start dating someone, make him jealous, everything will be in the track like before.

[Yourman86]

I wouldn't worry about an OFs. Your good.

[Topherfreak]

Shit hit me up I'll please you you to me what u want I'll give it if u prefer I'll take charge I'm open so...

[HardMan2788]

I'm so very sorry that this is happening to you. Please don't think that you're not appealing or sexy. I've been divorced for a few years now. If give anything to pay attention to an amazing woman like you

[HardMan2788]

*I'D give anything...

[Anonymous]

Chillax.

[Anonymous]

You should feel betrayed; he is a douche bag to do that to you.

[Anonymous]

Maybe separate for awhile so he misses you because he isn’t going to get any of these women on Instagram anyway and once he realizes that and knows what he has with you is real he will come back wanting you more