Why did my boyfriend go soft?

Anonymous

I know, a little TMI. But we've been together for almost 7 months and the past couple of weeks he's had this problem of going completely soft during sex and I can't help but think its because he's not attracted to me. I've even suspected that he might have gotten semi soft during sex before. We were both virgins when we met. So I can't help think the reason why we never had problems before is that it was all new and he was just excited to be having sex but now he is getting bored of it and doesn't find me as attractive. He says he is attracted to me and doesn't know why he is going soft. He used to get hard just laying down with me. Now, not so much. Also, he loves to shower/bathe together he never gets aroused which I have always found weird. Anyways, do any guys have this problem? Or any girls who's SO gets this way?

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Superb Opinion

virgin20 Yoda
+1 y
Have you been drinking beforehand? Could be whisky dick.
Or he could have some kind of erectile dysfunction. If you're worried get him checked out, there could be an underlying medical issue!
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- Asker
  +1 y
  Nope, no drinking before hand. We've had that issue before. Which made sense. But all these times have been sober.
- virgin20
  +1 y
  I wouldn't say attraction is the problem. Like men are generally quite horny and little stimulation generally gets then going. You could try watching porn stuff that he used to like watching to see if the memory gets him up. Otherwise back to my point, there could be a medical issue and talk to a gp
- Asker
  +1 y
  Well thats another issue. He occasionally watches porn. I don't really know how often. He just says he does it very rarely.
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- virgin20
  +1 y
  And what's his reaction to watching it? Is he hard from that? If he is maybe see what he's into and try that on him and see if it works
- Asker
  +1 y
  From what I can tell it's just basic porn. Nothing kinky or wild. Some girl on girl and oral.
- Asker
  +1 y
  And I asked him if it ever happens while he is watching porn and he said a few times but I don't if he just said that to make me feel better or not.
- virgin20
  +1 y
  Does he only go soft if you are having penetrative sex or any form of it? How long has this went on for?
- virgin20
  +1 y
  Does he wear a condom?
- Asker
  +1 y
  It seems like its only with penetrative sex. And not all the time.. Its only just now happened three time this past week. Though like I said I've suspected him of not being full aroused. And no. Im on BC so he doesn't wear a condom. He has a really hard time if he does wear a condom.
- virgin20
  +1 y
  I'm not sure whether you are doing it too often, like maybe he can't cope with it. Maybe if he goes soft go back to foreplay and see if he can go up again. If not, depending on where you are from, try types of viagra or something or as I keep saying, maybe get him checked out

Most Helpful Guy

Noodle_fan Yoda
+1 y
because he have erectile dysfunction , so it is him not you
actually E D problem among men nowadays are much more common than people think , it caused by unhealthy lifestyle
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- Asker
  +1 y
  But he's only 23...
- Noodle_fan
  +1 y
  age doesn't matter , it caused by unhealthy lifestyle , example : if he has habit to wanking to porn very often

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 6

Wise4myage Master
+1 y
Are you sure he's not cheating on you?
0 0 0 1
- Asker
  +1 y
  Im positive he's not cheating on me.
- Wise4myage
  +1 y
  Then it could be any number of things, such as depression or stress, or even testosterone.
dudeinohio Master
+1 y
More common for older men... but it can on occasion happen to younger guys. If he's concerned, he can see a doctor for treatment.
0 0 0 0
Whtevernever Xper 6
+1 y
How old is he?
0 0 0 1
- Asker
  +1 y
  He is only 23
- Whtevernever
  +1 y
  He's either cheating or he has ED
- Asker
  +1 y
  I really don't think he's cheating. But if he had ED wouldn't that have cause problems from the get go?
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- Whtevernever
  +1 y
  Not necessarily. He's firmly out of puberty now. I've got a few friends who have experienced this with their men. I've got a lot of follow up questions. 😂 but you asked anonymously.
- Asker
  +1 y
  Ask away dude. Im an open book.
- Whtevernever
  +1 y
  Are his testicles undersized? Because that could mean low testosterone.
- Asker
  +1 y
  What are the normal size?
Anonymous
+1 y
Could be anxiety issues or new to sex
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Anonymous
+1 y
Probably performance anxiety
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- Asker
  +1 y
  But we've been together 7 months. This is something I am worried about now. Thats he's going to get nervous because he went soft.
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  its like panic attacks in that they can become self fulfilling prophecies. Someone worries about getting a panic attack and then they get one over worrying about getting one look up online to learn more about it
- hbg84
  +1 y
  Mister anonymous is right I've actually have had this problem before. Just like with premature ejaculation you can work yourself up into cumming to quick. Had that issue before I would worry about cumming to quickly and I would end up cumming really quick. Another reason could be low testosterone or not being fully recovered from the previous time. If you're having to much sex that can cause an issue with starting hard
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- hbg84
  +1 y
  Staying hard I meant
Anonymous
+1 y
He's nervous around you.
0 0 0 0
- Asker
  +1 y
  We've been together 7 months, why would he be nervous around me still?
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  He's been naked around you ever before?
- Asker
  +1 y
  Yes. We've been having sex for 7 months. And him going soft has only been an issue now. I've suspected him going semi soft before but he's always finished so I never questioned it.
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- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  You fear he has erectile dysfunction?
- Asker
  +1 y
  I fear he is not really attracted to me. ED I can live with.
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Dear girl you have really feel a guy won't get erection around a girl he's not attracted to?