Would you date someone who is waiting for marriage to have sex?

- Anonymous1 moAbsolutely. There other things you can do.
1. Dry humping
2. Masturbating to her
3. Mutual masturbation
4. Handjobs, fingerings, clit rubs
5. Blowjobs, eating pussy.
6. Thighjobs
7. Grinding. Where she grinds up against your exposed penis
8. God's loophole (anal). Big among Catholic school girls.
My last girlfriend was waiting for marriage. We tried a lot of things before having sex. It started with making out and her wanting to stay pure, then dry humping (love yoga pants), eventually my penis "slipped" out and I came all over her favourite yoga pants, she didn't talk to me for a week.
So eventually I convinced her just to let me jerk off to her, then jerk off to her topless except for a bra, then just wearing lingerie of a bathing suit, then she decided to let me jerk off to her exposed breasts, then her ass, then her fully naked.
We progressed then to mutual masturbation after eventually she started touching herself as I jerked off.
Eventually she felt brave enough to touch my penis and give me handjobs. After talking to her friends and watching some porn alone she surprised me with a blowjob.
Then we progressed to thighjobs, which is putting the penis between her thighs and thrusting, you can do this from the front or behind and you can run her clit with your penis thrusts if you postion right.
When her parents weren't home we tried grinding up against each other with her naked except for a tiny thong, baby oil works well with this. She would rub her vagina up and down my shaft until I came with nothing but a thong between her vagina and my penis. You can do this missionary or doggy style.
She again was talking with her friends and decided to try "Gods loophole". We did this, she didn't like it at first and cried in pain as I thrust until orgasm, I remember she had trouble sitting in church the next day.
One time while grinding with her in missionary postion her thong got pushed to the side by my thrusting penis and I penetrated her as I was about orgasm, she cried out for me to stop but I kept thrusting. That was how dhd lost her virginity. She was pissed for a week but I talked her around and we started to have full sex from them on and she loved it.0|13|0Is this still revelant?
Most Helpful Guy
- When I was 19-20. Ever since 21 na.
Because I'm not celibate and dating a girl exclusively who will not have sex before marriage is her deciding that I'M going to be celibate.
Totally understand that's not how girls look at it when they make that decision. But that's effectively what you're doing. So unless she is okay with me sleeping with other women still.
While she reserves herself for me till marriage. Then sure I could do that. But I'm not giving up sex for one girl, for the prize of one day having sex again. It's just idiotic to me.0|00|0Is this still revelant?
Most Helpful Girls
- I think personally waiting is difficult to base a marriage without sex. Not because sex is super important but because the dynamics of it. You might not have a good sexual chemistry which can lead to future problems. If your having bad sex and can't find a solution people are more likely to cheat or become depressed or resent eachother. If you want kids there maybe some real bad problems if your sexual chemistry makes it difficult to achieve all the necessary things to create a child or you may have infertility. The stress of not having sexual chemistry can cause outbursts of anger or frustration causing fights and divorce. I'm not saying its impossible to wait for marriage but I'm also saying its something to consider and sure there are some people who can be married and never have sex but it comes down to the things you think are important. I personally want to know how EVERYTHING between me and a partner work before I commit to marriage because its a big decision. Sex is one of those variables you have to know to choose the right fit in a life partner.
I have had relationships where I have waited for an extended amount of time before sex i. e. one time a year before sex and here is the thing it seemed perfect in a few of them but after sex they blew up because of incompatability in different ways each time. Also as a girl its hard to find guys who will wait and as a dude a lot of women I know find it creepy when guys wait. I dunno why but that's what I hear from other women.0|21|0Is this still revelant?You have a good point. But still divorce rates and infidelity are sky high in modern times. Most people have sex before marriage.
What happened? It’s complex.
- For sure (:
If I like someone enough to want to date and eventually marry, waiting for sex is not a deal breaker at all.
I think its one of the lesser things to worry about tbh, because we are all human, thus we are all able to engage in that kind of activity.
Now, there are more important things to worry about like life goals, and lifestyle compatibility.
A guy who wants to wait... I wonder if ill ever come across one, hahaha. That would be so sweet <3 Actually I have met some guys like that, they were religious. And honestly, I would have dated them. Such amazing people, incredible deep conversations. Sex is definitely not the only way to get entertained, hahahaha.
Talking about the nature of this universe however... hmmm, now that is sensual.
I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people disagree though. Im dont usually comply with the collective trends of thought.0|00|0Is this still revelant?
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39100- They say the BMW is the ultimate driving machine. Yeah that is until you drive it and it hurts your back because they are so stiff.
So yeah... no... test drives are necessary.0|112|5 - Yes, that's a good sign about her, she is a loyal person. A woman of standards.
I believe that sexual preferences and compatibility can be discussed honestly before marriage without the need to "try" things.
Some men use the "compatibility test" excuse to fulfil their sexual pleasure off you then find some other woman to conduct the same "test" on her. These are players but sadly many women don't get it, they fall in that trap.
A good man will value and respect your choices. A good man won't marry you for sex, but for who you are as a person.3|10|0 - If I was younger, no way. Having been with my exwife 25 years, I can say without question it would be one of the worst mistakes you can make in your life. You cannot learn sexual compatibility. Don't find out after you are married that you both are into different things. Or there is something sexually different that you cannot get past. The time to find all that out is before the marriage. There are things you just won't even know you like or don't like until you try them or get more sexually active.0|10|0
- No.
To me, a healthy and compatible sex life are necessary. And as someone with kinks and knowledge of exactly what I enjoy during sex, I feel like it'd be unfair not to explore and determine compatibility before marriage.
It'd suck if I married someone only to find they weren't able to be a dom (me) I could trust or that they felt uncomfortable with it. It'd be a short-lived marriage, and a waste of both of our time.
Someone who saves themselves for marriage is fundamentally incompatible with me. And it'd be unfair for them if I married them, too.0|11|0 - 1. I know of many cases where a woman pretends to be all about waiting when she's talking to a guy who is a good catch but she's letting unemployed Chad, wannabe gangster Tyronne, and Billy Bob the biker gang member bang her every day of the week. So I'd have to have very, very good reason to believe she's not doing that to even consider it. 2. Is she marriage material? 3. Is she signing that pre-nup today? 4. Do I want to get married?
Lot of questions that would need to have a "yes!"0|12|0Ofcourse there are going to be pink dislikes. Because how dare you have standards!
- I can't say it would be easy.
But if you have that strong connection it wouldn't really be a problem. You wouldn't hold it against them either.
Sex is a physical expression of how you feel towards someone. Okay, bad analogy for those who are into BDSM with their partners. But, hopefully you see my point.
Sex isn't a requirement on my part. Yes, it's nice. It's just not a determining factor for me.0|00|0 - yes, but I can tell you that can go bad if it uncovers incompatibilities and other emotional issues. I've seen marriages go into incredible suffering and/or divorce related to that. so it's a double edged sword and only you can decide how to limit risks and work through it successfully. you'd think life is so simple... it just isn't because world so damaged.0|00|0
And that is why you should live together for at least a year before getting married, gives it time for both to see the other one's real side.
Clarification:
I would respect the woman, thats most important to honor her emotions else there is no relationship. And I'm only talking in a committed relationship.
I can say from personal experience, especially as one gets older or experienced, this is really hard and not healthy to go long period of time without this. It is an essential part of the relationship bond, I assume for all as well.
Within this are additional compatabilities that are essential to work out and at the moment, I don't know how else to work them out for it is deep intimacy... which exposes all sorts of other emotions.
And thus, there is risk in postponement to some magical day. I'm more on the side of make commitment, honor the woman and her emotions, and let nature take it's flow.
I see no way to mitigate all risks and some things just have to be explored and worked out as you both evolve.
It's equally unhealthy to "buy and try and discard" which seems too often in the current generation thinking. An older couple I met (80's) showed how that generation thought differently. They GOT MARRIED... not a relationship. Then they worked things out. That's that!
- Nope! That is like my grandparents generation for that mentality. No one was in my generation does that. Plus on top of that these days there are plenty of people that look like their female and still have a dick... I'm just saying. The only way to tell for sure is to actually see it and feel it for yourself. God forbid I should put a ring around it and make a commitment with someone who doesn't have a pussy. I'm fine with using protection if that's what she wants, but just because she chooses to stay a virgin until she's married doesn't mean that I have to. I will know more force her into that situation than I would allow her to force me into abstinence. In that specific situation it's better to simply just leave her be so she can find someone else who shares her views, however rare and uncommon that may be.0|02|0
- Anonymous1 moIf she is a virgin yes. If she isn't I wear a condom. Once we are married I'll take it off. That simple 🤷♂️.
I mean... even a used car you test drive it before and after🤣. A new car since is virgin you must either get in debt (engaged) or purchase it (marry) to ride it (sex).0|00|0 - Yes absolutely. Deep down this is what I really want.
But she needs to be someone special for sure. She can’t be looking for a financial or emotional “savior”. She can’t be controlling. Her family has to be compatible. She has to completely respect me. I have to have faith that the absolute worst thing possible will never happen (her cheating on me while where engaged.).4|10|0 - Anonymous1 moComing from someone who was trying to wait, it was very hard to find someone who wasn’t bothered by that. I dated one guy who was a virgin as well and so it worked out that way. Most of the other guys felt like sex had to be part of the relationship. Even though I didn’t wait, I’d still date someone who was waiting. Sex doesn’t play a big part in a relationship to me like it does others. I could stay celibate until I was married honestly.0|20|1
- If she truly is a virgin, then such a woman is almost as rare as a unicorn. And the answer is yes. I would definitely date a virgin and wait for marriage. Statistically, those are the most high quality relationships. She will also carry no bagage from past relationships (which is a huge problem in our (western) society and has lead to the fall of many relationships). And when it comes to the bedroom fun, it's something that can be taught. And we both will adapt to each other's needs.1|00|1
- No.
1) I don't date religious people. Spirituality is fine, but no religions, holy books or gods.
2) I wouldn't want to make the supreme commitment of marriage only to discover that my partner had sexual hang ups. I want to know that we are sexually compatible.1|02|0 - Anonymous1 moThe car analogy is dumb. "Test it before I buy it." Like sex is what determines if you should marry someone or not. Yeah good luck with that marriage. I would never date someone who compares me to a car 🤦♀️ and thinks of sex as test driving me.2|20|0
I know more car analogies, but so many people sell themselves short. Sex is an investment. Without marriage it is a lost investment.
- That's fine, but I would not be exclusively dating that person. If she doesn't want to take the car out of the garage, or even touch or think about it, that's fine, but then she shouldn't mind if someone else wants to drive it. That would just be ridiculously selfish and illogical. Gotta keep those gears oiled.0|02|0
- If it’s for religious reasons I probably wouldn’t because someone that devout would not be compatible with me. But for other reasons I would strongly consider it.0|00|0
- Sex is a huge part of anybody's life. Amd a lot of marriages fall apart because the gap between the spouses sexual desires and/or proclivity is just too wide.
there's the old rhetorical question : "Would you buy a car without test driving it first? Of course you wouldn't."
You would be doing yourself a massive disservice if you didn't learn everything you could about the person you are going to spend your forever with.0|01|0 - Anonymous1 moNOPE! as you get older n date more you realize why this is a risky idea. I dated someone and we were so attracted to one another but when we had sex there was NO CHEMISTRY.. no way I'd risk that happening.. im currently married as of recently lol but we definitely didn't wait. No way I'm buying before test driving lol0|21|0
- No. I need to be sure of certain things before committing to a person for the rest of my life. Sexual compability is one of them. If a person see this differently we are not meant to be together and dating would be a waste of time for both of us.1|20|1
- Anonymous1 moI mean i don't plan on waiting for marriage even though im a Christian because i need to know im sexually compatible with the person beforehand. Im still a virgin and i don't wanna throw it away to just anyone but i do hope to consummate the relationship when we're both in love and deeply committed but if i met a guy and he wanted to wait and i truly cared about him id be patient.0|10|0
Do you honestly have faith in God? Adam and eve were designed for each other. If you have faith in God their will be no fear of "sexual compatibility". That fear is consistent with worldly people, not God. You either believe two become one flesh or you don't. You will not be blessed through sin. Sex without marriage is sin. Marriage is not a piece of paper, wedding, or ring. It is a life term commitment before God to stay together. Sex without that is sin.
- NO under no circumstances, what if they didn't like sex? Both of you have invested lots of time, and energy in each other, then all the money for a wedding, only to find out one of you is a total freak in bed and the other doesn't like it or likes it just a little. So now you have all this time invested, money for the wedding, and more money for the divorce when this could have been known on the first date.1|01|0
- If I was willing to date at all and also not asexual, this would be ideal.0|00|0
- Nah, I am not religious myself and I it's absurd to me to wait for marriage when I am not even sure if I'll ever get married... Plus we are on 21th century ffs!1|20|1
- I am waiting until marriage as well so this is no problem.2|21|0
- No. What would be the point? Besides, I don't plan on getting married.0|00|0
- Yes, I would respect his choice for not wanting sex now2|30|0
- Sex has little to do with why I would want to "date" someone, so it's not something that factors in here.0|00|0
- Of course, it’s a matter of respect which is highly important in a relationship.1|30|0
- if she will do everything except sex i would date her for awhile, but not long-term (unless i'm the one who's gonna marry her0|00|0
- Anonymous1 moI would but I get it somewhere else on the side while I waited because most females who say that don’t actually mean it in their head they think they do but when they find a guy who they think is it, they always throw it to the side and do it anyway.0|00|0
- No never. I do not want go into his sin. And I don't even find it right to have sex before getting married.0|00|0
- Yes, as long as we are getting married in three days...3|10|0
- Yes, why wouldn't I look for someone who shares the same/similar moral-standard?2|21|0
- Nope. I’m not religious, I enjoy sex, and I don’t care about marriage. So that’s not really my cup of tea.0|20|0
- Anonymous1 moI hate to put it this way... But, I prefer to test drive a car before I buy it.0|00|0
- Yes I would. You should respect each others boundaries0|00|0
- Well no, because what if I liked eating ass and she didn't? Too much on the line..0|00|0
Just discuss your sexual preferences with her? I believe an honest conversation can yield the same effect without her having to give up her standards.
@Psychoanalytical How she can have preferences if she is a virgin or doesn't have sex. Your point of view is fairytale/ utopic/ impossible
@MMM31 You replied below "a test drive is absolutely necessary".
I have never seen a woman answer such a question this way honestly (unless she is extremely hypersexual and high on testoterones). And you are a new account just created today so I have no plausible reason to trust that you are a woman or that your claims are valid.
You don't represent women to me anyway. I'm a virgin who never had sex BY CHOICE and I have WELL DEFINED preferences.
Cheers :D- Show All Show Less
@Psychoanalytical yes, there is the answer. You are a virgin. Young and inexperienced. You haven't met experienced women yet
@MMM31 What does "experienced women" have to do with my OWN preferences? No matter how experienced a woman is, it means nothing if our preferences are conflicting. And this can be easily decided on through an honest conversation.
an honest conversation with a woman to whom sex is new territory.. yeah, I don't know about the honest part..
You are unable to say if you like vanilla ice cream if you have never eaten them (or to compare it to chocolate). Because you simply don't know the taste.
of course, it is a metaphor but this is how the world worksMetaphors aren't always fit to the scenario.
Here is an example: Is that ok if I'm only interested in dating other virgin? ↗
There is a guy in the opinions who compared sex to brain surgery, see how his opinion got downvoted, because it is not a valid metaphor.@Psychoanalytical I don't care if my opinions will be downvoted or not. I'm faithful to my beliefs.
- Anonymous1 moI see there are a lot of dishonest people on here saying yes because I know for a fact that most people won’t wait and if I don’t plan on getting married or again then why would I be dating someone that’s waiting for marriage to have sex? I think that if they were OK with giving oral sex until then I might be able to hold off if I was planning to get married to them0|01|0
- I kinda have a biting fetish.. soo if i get a who's eagerly waiting or has a habit to bite non-stop or if she enjoys it.. i'll immediately marry herr...1|00|0
- Anonymous1 moYeah of course I’d respect his wishes and I’d wait for him, but that doesn’t mean I have to be a virgin as well lol0|00|0
- I would and I have my I was my wife's first I don't usually tell people private details we dated for two and a half years before we got married and we married for 17and a half years for a grand total of 20 years together until she passed away0|01|0
- Not for religious reasons because I don't really have a use for religion. (Not faulting anyone who is religious, just my personal choice.) If I felt that the person was special enough, I'd probably date them.1|01|0
- That’s a lovely question and yes I would date a girl who does that0|00|0
- No
I don't mind being in a platonic relationship, but I'm not a fan of marriage xx0|20|0 - maybe? part of courtship is the physical closeness.0|00|0
- Wow I didn’t expect so many guys willing to wait. I have faith in humanity2|40|0
- Yes and I'm also waiting till marriage as well! A relationship is more than just sex. Also I rather do it with the right guy that I wanna spend the rest of my life with!0|10|0
- Yes. I’m actually crushing on a God fearing woman who is saving her body for marriage. My current girlfriend wants us to have intercourse before marriage.1|01|0
- I am waiting for marriage to have sex as well. So I would definitely be happy dating someone who felt the same way. And it's really encouraging to see so many people agree with this perspective1|00|0
- Nope, sorry, besides the libido, it's religious and I don't want a religious wife0|00|0
- Anonymous1 moPeople are looking at chemistry and compatibility but good sex before doesn’t mean good sex after marriage. It means you are really getting married for sexual purposes and there are so many non sexual things a couple can do to stay close.2|01|0
- Maybe?
I don't like contracts, and a girlfriend without physical intimacy is just a friend.
So we're likely going to be friends for a very long time.0|10|0 - Sex is so important for a healthy and happy relationship. I wouldn't wait until marriage0|00|0
- Imagine the sex was boring. Its gonna either be expensive or very unfulfilled life0|00|0
- I would stay with her if I really liked her but I would definitely be having sex with other women behind her back until she was ready0|01|0
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