On average, how soon after you start dating do you wait before having sex?

Question

I'm NOT asking whether you answer this question according to a formula or a rule. I'm simply asking - on average - how often do you date someone before you are comfortable moving on to physical intimacy. When I ask about having sex, I am not limiting the question to intercourse. Hand jobs, oral sex, whatever it is that makes each other get aroused to the point of orgasm. . . how long before that happens?

First date. Why wait?

Second date. Just want to make sure all those feelings on the first date weren't a fluke.

Third date. Haven't you heard of the three date rule?

One to two months. Why should something that important be rushed?

Three to four months. I don't want my "body count" to be too high.

More than four months but I'm not waiting for marriage.

I'm waiting for marriage.

Select age and gender to cast your vote:

GirlGuy

Answer 1

Gwenhwyfar | 2.5K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

One to two months

WowwGirl

1 mo
@Gwenhwyfar
👍
WowwGirl

1 mo
😐😐😐
Gwenhwyfar

1 mo
@WowwGirl 😘😘😘
Show All Show Less
WowwGirl

1 mo
😇 you are
Guardian45

1 mo
(faints)🤯
Gwenhwyfar

1 mo
@OlderAndWiser thanks 😊

Answer 2

WowwGirl

@Gwenhwyfar
👍

Answer 3

WowwGirl

😐😐😐

Answer 4

Gwenhwyfar

@WowwGirl 😘😘😘

Answer 5

WowwGirl

😇 you are

Answer 6

Guardian45

(faints)🤯

Answer 7

Gwenhwyfar

@OlderAndWiser thanks 😊

Answer 8

WowwGirl | 341 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

Marriage

WowwGirl

1 mo
Nobody believes me 😆
OlderAndWiser

1 mo
I believe you.
WowwGirl

1 mo
Honestly, I plead the 5th
It's a ND policy 🙃
Show All Show Less
OlderAndWiser

1 mo
ND? Don't know that acronym.
WowwGirl

1 mo
None disclosure
WowwGirl

1 mo
No agreement ❤️
Gwenhwyfar

1 mo
Brother husbands? 😊
WowwGirl

1 mo
@Gwenhwyfar shut up😂 it's a series
WowwGirl

1 mo
2021 probably
Gwenhwyfar

1 mo
@WowwGirl bouncing from dick to dick wearing only a pair of black suede boots...

Sorry. I’m only half awake and not half as horny as that probably sounds 😂.
WowwGirl

1 mo
@Gwenhwyfar doesn't sound like a bad life to me dude😌❤️ more like uhhhhh winning.

Yeah it's in Utah so I'll need boots thank you😂😂😂
AFellowWeeb

1 mo
YOU? SAID MARRIAGE? ok

Answer 9

WowwGirl

Nobody believes me 😆

Answer 10

OlderAndWiser

I believe you.

Answer 11

WowwGirl

Honestly, I plead the 5th
It's a ND policy 🙃

Answer 12

OlderAndWiser

ND? Don't know that acronym.

Answer 13

WowwGirl

None disclosure

Answer 14

WowwGirl

No agreement ❤️

Answer 15

Gwenhwyfar

Brother husbands? 😊

Answer 16

WowwGirl

@Gwenhwyfar shut up😂 it's a series

Answer 17

WowwGirl

2021 probably

Answer 18

Gwenhwyfar

@WowwGirl bouncing from dick to dick wearing only a pair of black suede boots...

Sorry. I’m only half awake and not half as horny as that probably sounds 😂.

Answer 19

WowwGirl

@Gwenhwyfar doesn't sound like a bad life to me dude😌❤️ more like uhhhhh winning.

Yeah it's in Utah so I'll need boots thank you😂😂😂

Answer 20

AFellowWeeb

YOU? SAID MARRIAGE? ok

Answer 21

DizzyDesii | 6.1K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

I’d be down to do handjobs/fingered first month honestly. Oral sex would be sometime 3 months +. Sex would be sometime 6 months +. Phone sex could be first week, who knows. I dont get physically sexually with many. Out of the two i had sex with, one was 6 months in and the other was a year/half before we had sex. For oral, that happened like 9 months in with the one i did that with. For masturbation, that was like 3 months in with one ex but almost a year later with the rest who were just friends turned crushes yet not boyfriends

Guardian45

1 mo
(faints)🤯
DizzyDesii

1 mo
@Guardian45 lol what
Guardian45

1 mo
(gulp) I'm dying. 🥵
Show All Show Less
DizzyDesii

1 mo
@Guardian45 you want me to quench your thirst or sumn haha
Guardian45

1 mo
Yes! LOL 😆 🤣 😂 😹
DizzyDesii

1 mo
@Guardian45 prepare to drown 😝🐱💧💦👅

Answer 22

Guardian45

(faints)🤯

Answer 23

DizzyDesii

@Guardian45 lol what

Answer 24

Guardian45

(gulp) I'm dying. 🥵

Answer 25

DizzyDesii

@Guardian45 you want me to quench your thirst or sumn haha

Answer 26

Guardian45

Yes! LOL 😆 🤣 😂 😹

Answer 27

DizzyDesii

@Guardian45 prepare to drown 😝🐱💧💦👅

Answer 28

Vickymoore9 | 134 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 5

When I was single I avoided dates like the plague, when I went on a date it was because I wanted to see if the guy was a good fuck 😂
For me I had a pretty good idea if things clicked between us hanging out. If I was going to invest into any time I was going to go make sure the sex was good first. I love sex and I’m not going to waste time getting to know a guy only to find out he sucks in bed fuck that. I know so many friend who are married most say their husbands suck in bed literally. They was so invested then sealed the deal that’s stupid sex is a major part. I think they wasted their time and their husbands time sex should be the one of the top connections you make before committing to marriage. Most of my friends have cheated and know their husbands cheating. While I may had picked mine in a way people might think I’m a slut. Most people are married and being sluts because they didn’t get shit right!!!

Answer 29

midnightmoon05 | 342 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

After the initial 2-4 dates (hugs, hand holding).. it gets more serious...6-8 dates... physically closer... sex after that...
upto 2 months minimum.. if we see each other once a week/2 times a week.
that would mean, the level of trust, closeness, connection is there.

Guardian45

1 mo
(faints)🤯

Answer 30

Guardian45

(faints)🤯

Answer 31

JackSmy | 2.7K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

If we have had several dates, I think she knows I like her, but I am not the kind to pressure her into anything.
I usually say something about how I feel, and that I am comfortable, waiting, until she feels comfortable, with me.
I really like focusing on getting to know WHO she is, and WHAT she likes, just going places, and doing things!
I just leave it be, and when she is ready, when we are at the level, and she loves, and trusts, it just happens.
No timeline, no expectations!!
Any time, together, is GOOD time, and at some point she likes kissing, and hand-holding, and I don't like OVERT, OBVIOUS Public Displays of Affection, but when she takes my hand, and pulls me into a secluded place, just to kiss? WOW!!
Don't RUSH into sex!! Enjoy all the 'Foreplay' along the way!!

Answer 32

Brainsbeforebeauty | 950 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

For me I guess it depends on the person and how slow or fast that level of comfort builds or that level of sexual attraction builds... And it also depends on the other person and when they're ready to take it to that level as well... I will say the times I/we waited longer are the ones that lasted

JackSmy

1 mo
@Brainsbeforebeauty Seems that with some years, comes some wisdom, and understanding.
I NEVER rush in, anymore. I just meet, connect, and then love, when I know there is a feeling, a connection!
Sometimes, in a day, or two, she contacts me, and I know she is interested!! Love that!! Love assertive women, and respect them!!
So we have a lunch date, or something 'casual' and meet, so she is free to leave, at any time!
Those ALWAYS work out the best!! I NEVER want her to feel pressured, or like she can't just walk away! Then a few more, and more, as we get to know each other.
With all of those dates, NONE, have ever left, or walked away!
For me, it is always about her feeling safe, and comfortable! I walk her to her car, on those dates, and make sure she gets in, and drives away.
I can't imagine how some women might feel, meeting some guy, now!! With so many stories in the news, and online TROLLS?
There are still some good guys, out there, and on here!
Brainsbeforebeauty

1 mo
@JackSmy 👍👍🙂

Answer 33

JackSmy

@Brainsbeforebeauty Seems that with some years, comes some wisdom, and understanding.
I NEVER rush in, anymore. I just meet, connect, and then love, when I know there is a feeling, a connection!
Sometimes, in a day, or two, she contacts me, and I know she is interested!! Love that!! Love assertive women, and respect them!!
So we have a lunch date, or something 'casual' and meet, so she is free to leave, at any time!
Those ALWAYS work out the best!! I NEVER want her to feel pressured, or like she can't just walk away! Then a few more, and more, as we get to know each other.
With all of those dates, NONE, have ever left, or walked away!
For me, it is always about her feeling safe, and comfortable! I walk her to her car, on those dates, and make sure she gets in, and drives away.
I can't imagine how some women might feel, meeting some guy, now!! With so many stories in the news, and online TROLLS?
There are still some good guys, out there, and on here!

Answer 34

Brainsbeforebeauty

@JackSmy 👍👍🙂

Answer 35

Hermes-Paris | 166 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 6

I'm of the opinion that one should take your time and enjoy things at their pace. But to answer your question I would say sex before finishing the third drink on the first date is too soon. Unless you are having doubles. Or any drink over 32 oz in size. Then you are Ok to doink after the finishing the first one.

Answer 36

Praisethewalls

Xper 4

First date
First date because you need to know if you're sexually compatible you're going to be hurt if you invest into it and you guys aren't compatible most woman say months but they know the second they see you whether they want to fuck you or not

OlderAndWiser

1 mo
But that doesn't mean that they trust you that much on the first date! If it works for you. . . go for it. With the women I date, that would not work.
Praisethewalls

1 mo
I respect and appreciate your input but times have changed there are a lot of different women out there but they look at men through narrow tunnel and to my knowledge and throughout most of my life a woman who can't figure it out it's not a good thing it normally means she either doesn't respect you or she's looking to date more than one person we never know anyone sex life
OlderAndWiser

1 mo
I understand that you need to know about sexual compatibility and you don't want to wait until the wedding night to find out that she's as cold as ice. However, for most women I have dated or discussed this with, they don't want to have sex until they trust that you will be respectful of them and they will feel safe being naked with you. I know that all women don't feel that way but I don't think that the majority of women under the age of 30 want to have sex on the first date. Maybe I'm wrong; I certainly don't date women under the age of 30 now!

Answer 37

OlderAndWiser

But that doesn't mean that they trust you that much on the first date! If it works for you. . . go for it. With the women I date, that would not work.

Answer 38

Praisethewalls

I respect and appreciate your input but times have changed there are a lot of different women out there but they look at men through narrow tunnel and to my knowledge and throughout most of my life a woman who can't figure it out it's not a good thing it normally means she either doesn't respect you or she's looking to date more than one person we never know anyone sex life

Answer 39

OlderAndWiser

I understand that you need to know about sexual compatibility and you don't want to wait until the wedding night to find out that she's as cold as ice. However, for most women I have dated or discussed this with, they don't want to have sex until they trust that you will be respectful of them and they will feel safe being naked with you. I know that all women don't feel that way but I don't think that the majority of women under the age of 30 want to have sex on the first date. Maybe I'm wrong; I certainly don't date women under the age of 30 now!

Answer 40

CalmYourTits | 131 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 5

My answer isn't up there, but I went with the three date rule because I figure I can spread out the dates lol.

Honestly, to me it depends on how good the connection is. If I think he really likes me than yea, but I need to be convinced first.

Jamie05rhs

1 mo
See, that's the shit that's annoying to me. When girls drag their feet and delay on going out just because they're expecting to have sex. It's ridiculous.
CalmYourTits

1 mo
@Jamie05rhs I said that my answer wasn't up there lol! You don't get it man. For me personally, I can't have sex with someone I don't trust. If that bothers you then don't effing go out with someone like me. I think you are a bit of a cry baby. There are so many girls out there with open legs.
Jamie05rhs

1 mo
Whoah, whoah. Lol. I think we're misunderstanding each other. I don't want sex!!

And I'm sorry I misread your answer. You are right; I should have paid better attention.
Show All Show Less
CalmYourTits

1 mo
@Jamie05rhs seems so
Jamie05rhs

1 mo
:) .

Answer 41

Jamie05rhs

See, that's the shit that's annoying to me. When girls drag their feet and delay on going out just because they're expecting to have sex. It's ridiculous.

Answer 42

CalmYourTits

@Jamie05rhs I said that my answer wasn't up there lol! You don't get it man. For me personally, I can't have sex with someone I don't trust. If that bothers you then don't effing go out with someone like me. I think you are a bit of a cry baby. There are so many girls out there with open legs.

Answer 43

Jamie05rhs

Whoah, whoah. Lol. I think we're misunderstanding each other. I don't want sex!!

And I'm sorry I misread your answer. You are right; I should have paid better attention.

Answer 44

CalmYourTits

@Jamie05rhs seems so

Answer 45

Jamie05rhs

:) .

Answer 46

MissDawn7961 | 950 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

I am waiting for marriage for that is what marriage is for and that is the way God wants it too ! thanks

Answer 47

DiegoO | 3K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

When I had my online relationship, I waited 4-5 months to see her on cam... At the same time I had a volcanic urge to start something sexual with her. Jeez, I shouldn't have ignore that red flag, but then I was naive at the time, so it stayed as a lesson.

Answer 48

Cindy69 | 69 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 3

I always have sex on the first date why wait for the next one cuz you never know there might not be a next one

OlderAndWiser

1 mo
So you have sex with every guy you date?
OmNomaly

1 mo
Is that even considered dating at that point?
From a technical standpoint that's moreso like hook up culture with extra steps.

Answer 49

OlderAndWiser

So you have sex with every guy you date?

Answer 50

OmNomaly

Is that even considered dating at that point?
From a technical standpoint that's moreso like hook up culture with extra steps.

Answer 51

Agape93 | 4K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

3-4 months but that’s more so I can do quality control, so to speak.

Answer 52

cth96190 | 2.5K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

When, or if, it happens it happens.
There is no imposed timetable.

OlderAndWiser

1 mo
I'm NOT asking whether you answer this question according to a formula or a rule. I'm simply asking - on average - how often do you date someone before you are comfortable moving on to physical intimacy.
WowwGirl

1 mo
Weeks to months

Answer 53

OlderAndWiser

I'm NOT asking whether you answer this question according to a formula or a rule. I'm simply asking - on average - how often do you date someone before you are comfortable moving on to physical intimacy.

Answer 54

WowwGirl

Weeks to months

Answer 55

douride2 | 11.5K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

It varies. Most times not until we are in a exclusive relationship & I feel comfortable.

Answer 56

The_Inquisitor | 192 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 5

3 date rule I will not lay my penis in the foundations of her women hood until we get to know each other better

Answer 57

jamesgoldman | 757 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

Using my average I end up with around 10 weeks

One was before the relationship and the other was 5 months

Answer 58

Myk13 | 199 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 6

It depends on the girl. If we get along and there’s chemistry. Why wait? If I really like her and there is the possibility of a long term relationship. There is no time frame. Whenever it happens.

Answer 59

Anonymous

I have sex even before becoming boyfriend and girlfriend

OlderAndWiser

1 mo
That could lead o a fairly high body count for your age.
Opinion Owner

1 mo
Well I'm 24 and my body count is 1 so I think I'm doing fine
OlderAndWiser

1 mo
Yes, that is fine indeed. The wording of your original post suggested otherwise.
Show All Show Less
Daniela1982

1 mo
Why do people give likes when it sounds more like thy don' agree with what was said?
Opinion Owner

1 mo
Why don't you go make that question elsewhere?

Answer 60

OlderAndWiser

That could lead o a fairly high body count for your age.

Answer 61

Opinion Owner

Well I'm 24 and my body count is 1 so I think I'm doing fine

Answer 62

OlderAndWiser

Yes, that is fine indeed. The wording of your original post suggested otherwise.

Answer 63

Daniela1982

Why do people give likes when it sounds more like thy don' agree with what was said?

Answer 64

Opinion Owner

Why don't you go make that question elsewhere?

Answer 65

OmNomaly

Xper 5

"More than four months but I'm not waiting for marriage."

I want long term relationships based on love and trust. I'm tired of being used.

Answer 66

Avicenna | 5.8K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

Well, these days a few dates. In my 20s, it was faster.

WowwGirl

1 mo
Ha😂

Answer 67

WowwGirl

Ha😂

Answer 68

monkeynutts | 1.2K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

Unfortunately I just jam it in there after the first date, sometimes it’s the second time we meet. Sometimes I have known them for years.

Answer 69

katiesmuff | 6.4K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

At least 15 to 20 minutes

OlderAndWiser

1 mo
Obviously, I missed that option in the poll choices!
Daniela1982

1 mo
It would take you longer than that to get your clothes off.
WowwGirl

1 mo
Odd.
Show All Show Less
katiesmuff

1 mo
@Daniela1982 I don't know? Shorts and a T can come off pretty quick! LOL
katiesmuff

1 mo
@WowwGirl Yes it would be if I was serious! LOL
WowwGirl

1 mo
My mistake

Answer 70

OlderAndWiser

Obviously, I missed that option in the poll choices!

Answer 71

Daniela1982

It would take you longer than that to get your clothes off.

Answer 72

WowwGirl

Odd.

Answer 73

katiesmuff

@Daniela1982 I don't know? Shorts and a T can come off pretty quick! LOL

Answer 74

katiesmuff

@WowwGirl Yes it would be if I was serious! LOL

Answer 75

WowwGirl

My mistake

Answer 76

Anonymous

Average is around 2 months, but I've done it (intercourse included) as early as the 2nd date when the chemistry with a woman was really strong.

Answer 77

Agem123 | 2.5K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

Depends on the person.

With my current boyfriend we had sex on our first date.

WowwGirl

1 mo
Yeah 😂
Agem123

1 mo
Marriage huh? I see you girl😂
WowwGirl

1 mo
We see each other 🤗
Show All Show Less
Agem123

1 mo
Haha for sure😉

Answer 78

WowwGirl

Yeah 😂

Answer 79

Agem123

Marriage huh? I see you girl😂

Answer 80

WowwGirl

We see each other 🤗

Answer 81

Agem123

Haha for sure😉

Answer 82

SuccessfulHornDog | 6.5K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

It depends on the girl and how long we knew each other prior to dating

Answer 83

OddBeMe | 3.3K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

Third date to a few months. Chicks are the time keepers.

Answer 84

Titanic1912 | 3.9K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

I’m waiting until the wedding night.

Answer 85

Jamie05rhs | 3.3K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

Nothing sexual before marriage.

Answer 86

Therisinghero12 | 371 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 7

H. Depends on when I'm comfortable

OlderAndWiser

1 mo
I understand that most people do not have a formula to decide this question. That's why I said, "I'm NOT asking whether you answer this question according to a formula or a rule. I'm simply asking - on average - how often do you date someone before you are comfortable moving on to physical intimacy." Saying that your average is, e. g., four months doesn't mean that you always have sex when you get to the four month mark in a relationship.

Answer 87

OlderAndWiser

I understand that most people do not have a formula to decide this question. That's why I said, "I'm NOT asking whether you answer this question according to a formula or a rule. I'm simply asking - on average - how often do you date someone before you are comfortable moving on to physical intimacy." Saying that your average is, e. g., four months doesn't mean that you always have sex when you get to the four month mark in a relationship.

Answer 88

Twalli | 12K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Guru

3 months if she's not a virgin
6 months if she is
I will wait up to 2 years though.

Answer 89

msc545 | 2.4K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

About the third date, but it varies from the first date to never. Too many variables in this situation to make any estimate reliable.

WowwGirl

1 mo
Agree

Answer 90

WowwGirl

Agree

Answer 91

Likes2drive | 16.6K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

Around 3 to 5 dates which could be a month

Answer 92

clampfan101 | 4.4K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

Marriage.

Answer 93

Massageman | 3.6K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

friends, engaged, marriage, sex, kids.

Answer 94

Trooper205 | 2.1K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

Until after Our Marriage.

Answer 95

Anonymous

Wait forever till marriage.

On average, how soon after you start dating do you wait before having sex?

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