How can you make a stubborn girl understand "Hey you can't afford a child... so don't be a whore okay?" ?

[Anonymous]

My little cousin goes from a boyfriend to another mostly for sex. Her current one is a police officer who is married with a kid but she doesn't care as he tells her all the "my bitch wife did that kid to keep me but our marriage never worked dadadi dadada you're different" and as she's naive for a dick she swallows all that.
I her big cousin and even her big sister could just let her be but the girl is 19 and never uses protection as she seems to only find the type of bastards who say "it just doesn't feel right with a rubber tho why can't you trust me blablabla" so she just goes "okay whatever was learned at school is fake then haha".
Mind you we're a brown family, what she's doing is against all odds, her parents only know she always comes home late from "work" and sleeps at her "friend's house" too often. We don't want to ditch on her but she just doesn't take care of herself at all and doesn't understand that if she falls pregnant none of these dickheads will stay! If she wants to start a family spending all your money on makeup and clothes is not the way to go start saving and understand you have brown parents-
I'll stop here but I'm honestly just so worried and she's so stubborn and dumb for dick I don't know how to help her please give me advice...

[Ozanne]

Usually telling people what to do is the worst thing you can tell someone who's stubborn, because they double down and motor right on making bad choices despite you. Stubborn people often need a lot of ego-stroking and encouragement to do the right thing, because often enough - insecurity is the issue.

Even the most staunch, loud, rude feet-firmly-planted-on-the-floor stubborn people who make themselves out to be so tough and so all-knowing are usually the ones that require more encouragement. Unlike most people who can respond to some reason, these are the type of people that respond to some understanding and calmer communication.

You can tell her that you know she's beautiful and worth so much better, that what she's doing is going to eventually put her in a category she doesn't deserve to be in. If she hears it from you that you value her and think she's great and deserves better, she may half-believe it enough to start making the right choices.

[Screenwriter]

Could say you'll take her to get birth control insert that lasts for 5 or 10 years...
I can't think of anything else that will prevent pregnancy.
But I'd be more worried about her contracting an STI!!! Unprotected sex with many men is foolish for more than one reason...
Mention there are venereal warts, herpes, and a HOST of STIs that can block your tubes when you finally WANT to have a child. This is no joke. And most of them are common, too.
The problem is she IS very young and the very young never think anything will happen to them. Saying you'll take them to the birth control clinic for blood tests and to be examined might be helpful.
But you can neither take a horse to water, NOR make it drink.
Good luck.

[ZackBan]

Well seems both you and her are on the extreme ends of the spectrum where she's completely going full ho and having unsafe sex with lots of dudes you're being too uptight about family and kids and finding someone who will "stay".

I say it's ok to live while you're young, try things, have experiences, meet people. But as much as I hate condoms I've never touched a girl without one before because it's also improtant to be safe, make sure you don't get someone pregnant or catch something.

I think instead of talking her out of her entire lifestyle you should focus on talking her into considering safety regardless.

If condoms are not an option at least she can take pregnancy pills to suppress ovulation or something like that.

[samiammm]

Is there any way you can get the parents involved?
I know it's not the bets idea but nor is the one wherein she is pregnant with a married man's child.



She should do something to avoid pregnancy as well as all the STDs.


Try an intervention, if not then it's probably best to get adults involved.

[purplepoppy]

Tell her use contraception or keep your legs closed.

[havingfun101]

Future single mothers are funny!

[Iknowbestgirls]

Send your cousin my way!

[shanshu]

Tough love, let her learn the hard way, you tell her something like that then she will bite back at you, why you want to call her a whore, you basically calling every woman who loves sex a whore. Let her enjoy the sex and all, it's her life

[Valnac]

She needs to get counseling.

[Yourman89]

Geeze! Maybe she will just have to learn the hard way.. the married men will run her off so fast if that happened.