Why my friend with benefits doesn't ask for sex anymore but he'll be around me whenever I need him in non sexual way?

Question

Answer 1

JPrez | 1K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

Could be a few things. He now has a girlfriend and doesn't want to threaten that relationship. He may be tired of the sex and still value you as a friend. He could be becoming gay. Could be a beta type who has a low sex drive.

Asker

3 d
hmm my instinct didn't tell me that he has new person. and he seems lost weight a lot because of work stress :/
JPrez

3 d
Oh, well, the stress may be causing his sex drive to suffer then. One other issue and do not take this the wrong way but it does happen - he may have lost his attraction for you and not be interested in sex because of it. Happens to guys and girls sometimes.
Asker

3 d
what's it like to lost attraction for someone?
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Asker

3 d
should I test him by sending him my underwear picture to him?
JPrez

3 d
It can make the relationship suffer. Men are visual creatures so we zero in on body parts and if a girl changes her appearance, could be hair, could be stomach, could be boobs that affects how we are attracted to that person. We need the attraction in order to feel the passion. If we don't have the attraction, we're not gonna get jazzed about a girl, just being honest. Rather than send the picture, I would try to ask him in a non-confrontational way and be prepared mentally beforehand if he tells you that he's no longer feeling the attraction. Tell him you want him to be totally honest. At least you will know the truth then and you can decide what to do. Delaying the inevitable conversation will increase your worry. Better to know and move on or if it's not the attraction issue, then the two of you can work on the problem together perhaps.
Asker

3 d
hmm why I should not send the picture?

I don't know how to ask him. because I don't like the topic.
JPrez

3 d
I don’t think the picture would make a difference- just being honest. Think you need to have conversation whether you like the topic or not but in the end, that’s your call to make.

Answer 2

Asker

hmm my instinct didn't tell me that he has new person. and he seems lost weight a lot because of work stress :/

Answer 3

JPrez

Oh, well, the stress may be causing his sex drive to suffer then. One other issue and do not take this the wrong way but it does happen - he may have lost his attraction for you and not be interested in sex because of it. Happens to guys and girls sometimes.

Answer 4

Asker

what's it like to lost attraction for someone?

Answer 5

Asker

should I test him by sending him my underwear picture to him?

Answer 6

JPrez

It can make the relationship suffer. Men are visual creatures so we zero in on body parts and if a girl changes her appearance, could be hair, could be stomach, could be boobs that affects how we are attracted to that person. We need the attraction in order to feel the passion. If we don't have the attraction, we're not gonna get jazzed about a girl, just being honest. Rather than send the picture, I would try to ask him in a non-confrontational way and be prepared mentally beforehand if he tells you that he's no longer feeling the attraction. Tell him you want him to be totally honest. At least you will know the truth then and you can decide what to do. Delaying the inevitable conversation will increase your worry. Better to know and move on or if it's not the attraction issue, then the two of you can work on the problem together perhaps.

Answer 7

Asker

hmm why I should not send the picture?

I don't know how to ask him. because I don't like the topic.

Answer 8

JPrez

I don’t think the picture would make a difference- just being honest. Think you need to have conversation whether you like the topic or not but in the end, that’s your call to make.

Answer 9

OlderAndWiser | 17.1K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

Perhaps he has someone else in his life for a sexual relationship and he wants to be faithful to her but also maintain some loyalty and respect for you.

Asker

3 d
really? :( but my instinct didn't tell me that he has new person. and he seems lost weight a lot because of work stress.
OlderAndWiser

1 d
Or he lost weight to make an impression on a new lover.
Asker

1 d
hahaha. to be honest he looks awful when he's thin like underweight. so when I was around him a lot, he gained some weight and he looked much better, 😛

Answer 10

Asker

really? :( but my instinct didn't tell me that he has new person. and he seems lost weight a lot because of work stress.

Answer 11

OlderAndWiser

Or he lost weight to make an impression on a new lover.

Answer 12

Asker

hahaha. to be honest he looks awful when he's thin like underweight. so when I was around him a lot, he gained some weight and he looked much better, 😛

Answer 13

Tjsmoove | 142 opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Xper 5

he don't like the sex and he's demoted ya into the friend-zone with no sex bag

Answer 14

Lovesickkit

Xper 1

either he's no longer interested in that or he wants to become romantic with you

Answer 15

AmeerX | 2.5K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

Has already developed feelings for you

Asker

2 d
ooh 😳
Asker

2 d
but why he doesn't message me to talk about anything?
AmeerX

2 d
You have not opened up to him and most friends with benefits partners usually don't know if the other likes him or her or not. Someone here said it too that friends with benefits is about no communication or feels it is purely sex
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Asker

2 d
I don't know how to be open up to him.. and I mostly talk to him about my current situation. and I ever told him that I like him from beginning.
AmeerX

1 d
Just be yourself, you can do it. He likes you and you can start talking more about relationship and family with him
Asker

1 d
hmm... I don't know how to tell him.. my mind empty when I want to talk to him
AmeerX

1 d
Aww, you two share the same bed. Don't worry, he will like you of course

Answer 16

Asker

ooh 😳

Answer 17

Asker

but why he doesn't message me to talk about anything?

Answer 18

AmeerX

You have not opened up to him and most friends with benefits partners usually don't know if the other likes him or her or not. Someone here said it too that friends with benefits is about no communication or feels it is purely sex

Answer 19

Asker

I don't know how to be open up to him.. and I mostly talk to him about my current situation. and I ever told him that I like him from beginning.

Answer 20

AmeerX

Just be yourself, you can do it. He likes you and you can start talking more about relationship and family with him

Answer 21

Asker

hmm... I don't know how to tell him.. my mind empty when I want to talk to him

Answer 22

AmeerX

Aww, you two share the same bed. Don't worry, he will like you of course

Answer 23

boggboss | 5.6K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Master

No longer wants sex

Asker

3 d
I meant why?
boggboss

3 d
Only he has that answer

Answer 24

Asker

I meant why?

Answer 25

boggboss

Only he has that answer

Answer 26

Valnac | 10.6K opinions shared on Sexuality topic.

Yoda

Dump his ass.

Why my friend with benefits doesn't ask for sex anymore but he'll be around me whenever I need him in non sexual way?

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